By Adele
Wall Street would be swarming with cats if only:
1) We had thumbs so we could draw clever signs
2) We could march around on 2 legs while holding our signs
3) We weren’t so short, we’d probably get trampled
4) Karen would ever let us out of the house
But we want all the humans who love us to know that we CATS ARE MAD AS HELL, AND WE’RE NOT GOING TO TAKE IT ANYMORE.
In case you haven’t noticed, we’re staging subtle solidarity protests every single day. We call them Occupy Couch.
You may be wondering, “What do corporate greed and political corruption have to do with housecats? Cats have it made!”
Let me tell you…
Humans who get laid off and can’t find work, or who get sick and end up buried under medical debt, start sliding into bankruptcy. That’s whey they start buying us cheapo poisoned cat food from China.
When humans lose their homes to foreclosure, we end up in shelters or on the street.
This isn’t about cats losing cushy perks. Our very survival as pets depends on the prosperity of the 99%.
Besides, any protests that Virginia’s disgrace in Congress, Rep. Eric Cantor, calls “gathering mobs” are doing something right. Cantor’s attitude is, “Let them eat cake!”
Critics say Occupy Wall Streeters are pointless because their demands don’t fit on a bumper sticker.
Wall Street is a symbolic ground zero for greed and corruption. The protesters could be marching on almost any government building, health insurers and Big Pharma, retailers whose inventory consists of cheap goods made by slave labor, any company that has outsourced jobs or has an incomprehensible call center in India, any company that hides profits off-shore and pays almost no taxes.
The list could go on and on. You can’t “boil down” the myriad ways the wealthy, wily 1% steal from and screw everybody else — unless we fire up the cauldrons and literally boil down a few of them as examples.
The Tea Party should love that. They’re one step from burning witches themselves.
We hope the protests keep growing — and people follow through at the polls and unemploy every rich, self-serving, two-faced politician who thinks the 99% should go pound sand.
Eric Cantor, we’re looking at YOU.