Reality: Republicans’ Final Frontier

October 23, 2008

By Yul

Republicans are now fixating on who’s “real.” Sarah Palin recently told North Carolinians that certain parts of the country are more “American” than others. She meant small towns like Wasilla and wide-open spaces like the Alaskan tundra. Anywhere the inhabitants are sparse, live simply, and may be poorly educated.

It’s those evil city slickers with diplomas who read books and newspapers (and can name titles) and care about the world around them who aren’t “real” Americans.

They think too much and ask too many questions.

North Carolina’s Representative Robin Hayes, while campaigning for McCain, recently added that “liberals hate real Americans that work and achieve and believe in God.”

The McCain campaign has declared Northern Virginia “not real” because it leans Democratic. McCain’s brother Joe went so far as to jokingly call it “communist country.”

For a party that side-steps facts like the cast of River Dance – on the reasons for invading Iraq, stem cell research, healthcare, teen sex, evolution, global warming, Palin’s qualifications, you name it – their sudden zeal for real is truly bizarre.

Columnist Leonard Pitts asks, if they’re real, what does that make the rest of us? Fake?

Well, you can dress a Barbie Doll in a $150,000 wardrobe (Mrs. Joe Six-Pack should be so stylish) and program her to chirp platitudes when you pull her string, but that doesn’t make her a real choice for VP.

Palin still doesn’t even fully understand the job.

Unable to bring himself to play the court jester for his party (again), Colin Powell has endorsed Barack Obama. I guess that makes Powell fake, too.

Why Does McCain Think We Need MORE Fighting?

October 20, 2008

By Yul

Once again, John McCain has switched his campaign theme – from “change” to “fight.” At a Miami rally the other day, he talked about fighting about 17 times. Does he now plan to fight change if elected?

If so, admitting it is the first honest thing he’s said lately.

But I don’t get it. Thanks to Bush and Cheney’s “our way or the highway” attitude, there’s been nothing but fighting at home and abroad.

After enduring 8 years of threats and intimidation – from their own government – Americans want a cool head, not a perpetually angry guy who suddenly wants to drain the Congressional swamp he’s been happily wallowing in for 22 years.

As election day nears, McCain and Palin have resorted to spouting gibberish, nonsensically try to ride in to victory on another wave of rage and fear, not sensing that the tide on that tactic went out with Bush’s approval rating.

We’re sick of being the world’s biggest bully. People want a leader who’s smart enough to understand foreign and domestic matters, and willing to be constructive, not destructive.

McCain’s campaign recently said they don’t consider Northern Virginia “real” Virginia because it’s diverse, near Washington, and isn’t leaning Republican. Apparently, they think “real” Virginians are predominantly white, blue-collar simpletons who’ll turn up at their rallies and cheer for anybody who makes a few NASCAR references and pretends to be one of them.

They have no clue how sophistiCATed many of us really are.

So Virginia polls show Obama leading by 2-10 points, the first time a Democrat has been favored here for president since 1964, and McCain has been reassuring his dwindling supporters, “Friends, we’ve got them right where we want them.”

See what I mean? Gibberish.

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