Post-Debate: Donald Trump’s One Chewed-Up Cheeto

September 27, 2016

By Adele

Hope you tuned in for the debate last night to see the beginning of the end of Donald Trump’s run for president.

He started out fairly calm, but with no teleprompter to keep him grounded, Hillary soon got under his hide like a cat burrowing into a warm blankie. That caused him to retreat to his comfort zone, which means interrupting, bragging, lying, repeating himself, and mostly keeping a safe distance from facts.

And sniffling and guzzling water. What was up with that? Does cocaine need a chaser? I couldn’t take my eyes off his nose, waiting for a bat to escape the cave and gross out Lester Holt. “Joe Blo” on YouTube kindly compiled Trump’s nose action…

Later, Trump nonsensically claimed his “defective microphone” was the culprit. How? Did he get confused and try to snort it?

His hapless running mate, Mike Pence, claimed today on CBS This Morning that he never noticed Trump’s labored breathing. Sure, the world began tweeting about it simultaneously last night because Trump WASN’T sniffling.

Another hilarious moment came when Trump said, “I don’t believe she does have the stamina. To be president of this country, you need tremendous stamina,” while hanging onto his podium for dear life with both hands. He used his podium to prop himself up through much of the debate, while Hillary stood under her own power.

Hillary did a masterful job of holding her ground, letting Trump’s monosyllabic grunts and rambling accusations roll right off. You knew from her smile that she was picturing some idiot child playing grownup in a suit and tie whenever she looked at him.

I stand by my prediction that Trump won’t do any more debates, and his BFF, Rudy Giuliani, agrees it’s a bad idea. Trump knows now that he’s incapable of doing the prep necessary to get the best of a policy wonk like Hillary. To beat her, he’d have to become things he’s not — reasonable, rational, and coherent — and sustain it for 90 minutes.

Here are two other analyses of the debate I agree with. Seth Meyers brought out some great points…

And so did Trevor Noah…


Trump v. Clinton Debate is Must-See

September 26, 2016

By Adele

Not because it will be so enthralling, but because it will stand alone in this election. Trump’s campaign has consisted mostly of playing “I’m Rubber, You’re Glue,” turning EVERY criticism about himself into a charge against Hillary, even when it’s patently absurd.

He’s gone so far as to say she should be jailed and could be assassinated. He’s coasted on name-calling, bullying, threats, and precious little substance.

Tonight Trump’s in the big leagues for the first time, against the most seasoned debater he’ll ever face. He’s probably over the moon about the anticipated viewership, but if he thinks his schoolyard bully schtick, free of any grasp of the issues, is a recipe for success, Hillary’s going to hand his ass to him.

And when she does, Trump will withdraw from the remaining two debates and whine until election day that the process was unfair and rigged.

Trump has already cautioned NBC moderator Lester Holt not to fact-check, an indication Trump’s strategy is to rely on the well-debunked, fact-free lies he keeps repeating. He’s dumped such an avalanche of ignorance on this country, it’s become too deep to detail.

To prepare for the debate, Hillary’s been learning facts and practicing with a Trump stand-in. Trump thinks he can do it off the cuff because nobody expects him to know what he’s talking about.

There’s some truth in that. Trump’s supporters, who choose to remain willfully ignorant, will declare him the winner if he manages not to lose control of his bowels on stage.

In the past week, both candidates met with foreign leaders visiting the UN. Well, Trump verifiably met one, Egyptian President Abdel Fattah al-Sisi. To Fox News he claimed there were more to come, saying, “I don’t want to comment specifically on who, but a couple of people are coming over.”

But there have been no photo ops of any other fawning world leaders kissing his ring at Trump Tower. Maybe they asked to see his tax returns and he had his goons throw them out.

Clinton, in contrast, met also with Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe and Ukrainian President Petro Poroshenko and knew what was going on with their countries, as witnesses and press reported.

Meeting with al-Sisi, Clinton called for release of a U.S. citizen held hostage since 2014 for operating a nonprofit in Egypt. Trump never mentioned that. Maybe he was unaware of the situation, or he thinks the hostage is a loser for getting captured and deserves no help.

Now it’s time for Trump to face the woman he’s been lying about and demonizing. I hope Hillary leaves Trump looking like a chewed-up Cheeto. And when she does, mark my words, Trump will never debate again. There’s nothing a bully hates worse than being confronted.


Trump and Clinton Almost Face Off

September 8, 2016

By Karen

Trump and Clinton were like two ships passing in the night – on the aircraft carrier Intrepid. A weird setting for sparring with NBC Today Show host Matt Lauer, now known as Mr. Fluffmeister.

The candidates appeared consecutively to answer veterans’ questions on foreign policy and being commander-in-chief.

Hillary was first, and Lauer leaped for her throat, forcing her to explain her email misuse for the umpteenth time.

OK, we get it. Using her own server was dumb. But how many years has it been with no repercussions from anything that might have leaked, and no evidence she was ever seriously hacked? It wasn’t illegal at the time and there’s nothing to prosecute.

Hillary routinely gets crucified on many things that, if bungled by a man, would get a shrug and a, “Boys will be boys!”

Let’s face it. Hillary doesn’t have an open, sunny disposition. When cornered, she resorts to slippery lawyer-speak. Her detractors act like she’s the only politician in history to do that.

Thanks to Lauer’s pointless email questions, Hillary was hard-pressed to address foreign policy, and then Matt kept telling her to be brief.

But Hillary somehow managed to display great familiarity with geography, foreign affairs, and the challenges the next president faces.

And then came Trump. The bar for his performance was so low, all he had to do was not drool or poop his pants. His verbal vomit was presidential poetry to Lauer, who didn’t challenge any lie or boast. Nor did he push Trump onto the ropes to answer for anything.

With his customary disregard for the military audience, Trump dissed our generals as being “reduced to rubble” and hinted he’d fire many, yet make them submit within 30 days a plan for defeating ISIS. Not that Trump already doesn’t have his own secret plan. He just wants to see if his generals have another one.

Trump, you idiot. You’re not starring in The King & I.

Remember when Yul Brynner, the king of Siam, is stewing over how to prove to England’s Queen Victoria that he’s not a barbarian? When Anna, the English governess, asks what he intends to do, the king commands, “You guess!”

Trump wants to play “You Guess!” with the generals, thinking he’ll trick lowly beings with no right to advise a king president into giving him a plan. Which they’d do, and he’d follow because he has no clue.

Trump’s appearance was notable for its lack of specifics, admiration for Putin, and inability to resist insulting Obama and Hillary, which both candidates were asked not to do, and Hillary mostly complied with.

Trump sat slouched and didn’t even turn his head much to respond to any veteran’s question. Hillary spent most of her time on her feet, facing her questioners.

For all his attacks on Hillary’s physical fitness, Trump looked like an out-of-shape, low-energy, unhealthy couch potato.

Considering the double standard, I thought Hillary showed presidential-caliber comportment and intelligence. Trump, as usual, was a clown show.

Can’t wait for the September 26 real debate when Trump finally has to face Hillary.


FINALLY, Trump’s Sanity in Question

August 8, 2016

By Karen

“I am rubber you are glue, whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you.”

That’s about the only childish line Donald Trump hasn’t used in his insult-filled standup routine on Hillary Clinton.

Since delivering the most egomaniacal acceptance speech ever at the Republican National Convention, Trump’s been viciously lashing out in so many directions, the GOP has had no choice but to admit their emperor has no clothes.

But they still support this ranting lunatic who thinks he’s going to rule the world if he can convince us that his own demons are really Hillary’s. His delusions have officially reached Godzilla-like proportions.

CNN quoted some of Trump’s assertions about Hillary at his weekend appearance in New Hampshire…

“She took a short-circuit in the brain. She’s got problems.” “Honestly, I don’t think she’s all there.” “Unstable,” “unbalanced,” and “totally unhinged.” “She’s a liar. She is a horrible, horrible human being.” “She’s incompetent and I don’t think that you can even think of allowing this woman to become president of the United States.”

But days before that, Robert Kagan pointed out “There is something very wrong with Donald Trump” in the Washington Post, including…

“His personality defect would be the dominating factor in his presidency, just as it has been the dominating factor in his campaign. His ultimately self-destructive tendencies would play out on the biggest stage in the world, with consequences at home and abroad that one can barely begin to imagine. It would make him the closest thing the United States has ever had to a dictator, but a dictator with a dangerously unstable temperament that neither he nor anyone else can control.”

Bob Cesca at The Daily Banter compiled 30 excellent examples of Trump’s mean-spirited blather. You can’t read them and still think Trump should be allowed anywhere near Washington.

Trump undoubtedly believes his Hillary attacks are pure genius, as if nobody notices he’s regurgitating his own critics. Yeah, his wife Melania thought nobody would notice her parroting Michelle Obama, either.

Even old pickle-puss Charles Krauthammer thinks there’s a problem, saying Trump…

lives for the adoration. He doesn’t even try to hide it, boasting incessantly about his crowds, his standing ovations, his TV ratings, his poll numbers, his primary victories. The latter are most prized because they offer empirical evidence of how loved and admired he is.”

NBC reports that Trump’s mental state has become a campaign talking point.

But none of this should be new. Doonesbury cartoonist Gary Trudeau has lampooned Trump and his political ambitions for 30 years, publishing them in July as the book, Yuge! 30 Years of Doonesbury on Trump. The Washington Post ran a sizable sampling.

I’m relieved that election-watchers are finally acknowledging the elephant in the room. It’s a shame they didn’t during the primaries, before it was too late.


Cats for Hillary

August 3, 2016

By Adele

Yes, it’s a real movement. Just go to www.Twitter.com and search on #catsforhillary. Trump’s not the only one tweeting. In fact, cats are infamous tweeter-eaters, so let Donald consider himself warned. Just sayin’.

One detail I haven’t seen about Trump is if he has any pets. I’d bet a year of my treats he’s a dog person. Since he requires blind obedience, a cat couldn’t fail to in-fur-iate him.

Hold the presses! I just found something. Can’t confirm it anywhere reputable, but to put it as Trump himself would, “I’m reading that many people think” Trump has a Lab named Spinee (a retriever, the breed preferred by slave-drivers) and this pic of him is all over the ‘net…

SpineeTrump

On the other hand, Hillary’s not a pet person, although the Bill Clinton White House had a cat named Socks, and then Bill got a dog named Buddy. I was the CW reporter on the political cat beat back in the day.

I was also once an ardent Hillary nonsupporter, but started coming around during her run against Obama. Today, since Trump is the alternative, I’ve done a complete 180 on Hillary.

She’s ruthless, conniving, smart, organized. She can lie with a straight face. And she has claws — like needles — although she usually keeps them well-hidden. She’ll take what she learned from every misstep as secretary of state and see that nobody ever gets the best of her again. Putin, you hacking sack of Trump-loving poo. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Trump, on the other hand, thinks he’ll single-handedly make the world a better place by building walls, torturing families, persecuting Muslims, deporting 11 million people, bombing the Middle East, letting nukes multiply willy-nilly in bad places, screwing our allies, cozying up to despots, all while insulting, berating, and mocking everyone involved.

Let’s hope the latest outrage: Trump’s cluelessness on workplace harassment, reinforced by son Eric on CBS This Morning, drives another nail into Trump’s coffin with women…

As a fe/male/line who’s harassed by Max and Roc every day of my life just because… I can attest that being a strong female has nothing to do with it. And sometimes you can’t just “change careers” to escape it.

So, harassed women get tossed on Trump’s ever-growing pile of losers. Let’s hope they help to hand Trump the biggest loss of his life in November.

BONUS: While you’re on Twitter, if you want to ROTFLYAO, check out #TrumpYourCat.


Donald Trump Reveals His Black, Black Soul

August 1, 2016

By Karen

I stayed up late many more nights than I intended, watching the Republican and Democratic national conventions. The RNC was a riveting train wreck of D-list nobodies and has-beens willing to glom onto the Donald, culminating in Trump’s meandering, boastful, fear-inspiring, fact-free acceptance speech.

As for the Democrats, I wish they had stuck to Michelle Obama’s strategy the first night, which was, never mention Trump by name. To do so is to feed the malignant tumor that’s smothering this election.

But on the DNC’s last night, before Hillary Clinton gave her acceptance speech, a grieving Muslim father named Khirz Khan, accompanied by his wife, ripped Trump a new one for his many anti-Muslim rants. The Khans’ son was a captain in the U.S. Army in Iraq who died to save his fellow soldiers during an attack.

Trump’s response was unthinkable. He played the victim card, claiming Khan had “viciously attacked” HIM, and then went after Khan’s wife, implying that Ghazala Khan hadn’t spoken at the convention because she’s oppressed.

Trump was butt-hurt because Khan hit a nerve saying that Trump “has sacrificed nothing and no one.” We’ve seen not even a whiff of military or public service in Trump’s whole family.

Trump responded to ABC’s George Stephenopoulos with: “I think I’ve made a lot of sacrifices. I work very, very hard. I’ve created thousands and thousands of jobs, tens of thousands of jobs, built great structures. I’ve had tremendous success. I think I’ve done a lot.”

The man is so blinded by his own sense of entitlement, he has no clue what a “sacrifice” is.

Hillary got a bump in the polls to be in the lead again, but how on earth is ANYBODY in this country still thinking Trump, a lunatic with delusions of persecution and the habit of blindly striking back against every perceived slight, is fit to govern a country?

In what’s become their new daily routine, Paul Ryan and Mitch McConnell weakly repudiated Trump’s latest bullshit. They seem blissfully unaware that the fence they straddle is picket, and that Trump will say whatever it takes to impale their balls on it. With glee.

John McCain, with his own re-election on the line, denounced Trump in no uncertain terms. For once.

Mr. Khan appeared on Meet the Press over the weekend and expounded a bit on the anti-Trump sentiments Hillary actually asked him to delete from his speech, as well as his belief that Trump’s reaction to it indicates that Trump is utterly lacking in empathy and has a “black soul.”

Trump has shown it to us himself. How much more proof does anyone need?

BONUS: For anyone undecided about Trump, this article in The New Yorker is required reading. It’s about Tony Schwartz, the man who really wrote Trump’s book, The Art of the Deal. (Yes, he did. Trump even put his name on the cover.)


Mike Pence is Probably Doomed

July 18, 2016

By Karen

Donald Trump will never share the spotlight with any running mate, particularly one he hasn’t broken in as a doormat.

I’ve now seen Trump and his VP pick, Mike Pence, together twice, with Trump avoiding eye contact and behaving just short of dismissive. Pence will be walking on eggs, and no matter what he says or does, if Trump decides that telling Pence, “You’re fired!” will make Trump look more presidential to his followers, he’ll do it. And then claim the RNC “unfairly” stuck him with a low-energy loser of a VP.

I’m not shedding tears for Pence. He’s a typical backward-thinking, discriminatory misogynist who cloaks himself in religion, and now he’s volunteered to be the most pathetic second banana in American political history.

The best Pence can muster to say about Trump is, “He’s a good man,” and he repeats it like a mantra. I seriously doubt Pence’s religious faith recognizes incessant boasting, exaggeration, mockery, bullying, and lying as virtues.

I think we’re still looking at a Trump-Gingrich ticket by election day.

Meanwhile, Hillary’s team has been going great guns at turning Trump against himself.

After the Trump-Pence 60 Minutes interview, they must be giddy to get so much new fodder.

Trump says any disagreements with Pence occurred “a long time ago.” And after winning the nomination playing the outsider, Trump now says teaming with a career politician is good for “party unity.”

Since when did Trump EVER want party unity? His whole raison d’être has been to stomp the living shit out of the GOP.

Trump’s challenge now is to wring a drop of Pence-ibility out of all his positions. He’ll be making even less sense than Sarah Palin.

Pence must disavow most of his beliefs and dive into the deep end of Trump’s cesspool of negative campaigning. How long will Pence swallow his revulsion before he blows chunks all over Trump?

On 60 Minutes, Leslie Stahl asked Pence if he’d ever dare tell Trump he’d crossed a line, and Trump guffawed at the question, like, “Yeah, like THAT’S ever gonna happen!” Then Trump said he’d “listen” to Pence (not take his advice), but he’d never apologize to anyone for anything.

Pence brings nothing to the ticket but more mud. Now we’ve got two guys tap-dancing to make wildly divergent wacko notions mesh. Example: Pence tweeted that Trump’s ban on Muslim immigration is “offensive and unconstitutional,” so Trump’s now calling for “extreme vetting,” whatever that is.

How long and how much will Trump be willing to compromise? I’ll give him a month.

It’s a match made in hell. Let’s see how long those two can roast in it before someone spontaneously combusts.


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