U.S. Elects its First Dictator

November 9, 2016

By Karen

They’re calling it the American Brexit.

Donald Trump is president-elect and it’s official: ignorance, hatred, and bigotry are the fuel that runs the United States.

And don’t forget deceit. To people who listened to Trump’s year of verbal diarrhea and thought it sounded great, yet lied to pollsters because they were ashamed to admit it, I say, just wait. Your payback is coming. Very soon.

You can’t hand a demented monster absolute power, shored up by BOTH houses of Congress, and expect rainbows and roses.

Trump managed to deliver a coherent, moderately dignified, and inclusive acceptance speech, but we can count the days before he reverts to type. He’s never been able to sustain sanity.

In fact, it wouldn’t surprise me if he gloats and announces today that he was being sarcastic.

For a first lady, we’ve got a piece of Slovenian arm candy whose website misrepresented her level of education. In researching her immigration history (which Trump promised to provide but never did), the AP uncovered that she earned $20,000 in seven weeks, modeling in the U.S. before she was legally allowed to. She stole jobs from American models.

Melania announced that her focus will be cyber-bullying. Let’s hope she starts by closing her husband’s Twitter account.

What’s most galling about this revolting development is that Hillary may have won the popular vote.

After Trump has repeatedly bashed Mexicans and all Hispanics, Muslims, blacks, the military, women, and many others, you have to be a real fool to believe he’ll work in anyone’s best interests but his own.

One election won’t turn a profane, ignorant, narcissistic buffoon into a statesman overnight.

I’m going to go curl into a fetal position and cry now. This feels so much more ominous than the Bush-Cheney victories. Sure, that pair started wars, but they had some experience governing and didn’t go around pissing in everybody’s face with personal insults while they did it.

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Do We Need to Read EVERY Hillary Email?

November 2, 2016

By Adele

Emboldened by FBI Director James Comey announcing he found 650,000 emails that may or may not relate to Hillary Clinton on, of all places, pervert Anthony Weiner’s laptop, Trump supporter Wayne Allyn Root boldly wished for Hillary and Huma Abedin to die in a car crash like Thelma & Louise. Here’s Root’s outrageous warm-up act for Trump in Las Vegas…

And Trump crept up in the polls again. How on EARTH does Hillary’s email make him any less a paranoid, delusional, ignorant racist?

Trump, in the last week of his national fact-free “Projection 180 Tour,” proclaimed, “We can be sure that what is in those emails is absolutely devastating,” and, “This is bigger than Watergate, in my opinion.”

Talk about comparing apples to aardvarks.

I say it’s projection because Trump knows he’s hiding the “absolutely devastating” stuff in his own taxes. He shoots his mouth off with the assurance that Comey can’t touch those.

Then Trump bizarrely projected that Clinton is a “terrible example” for Trump’s 10-year-old son Baron.

(Baron? Why did Trump shoot so low on that? Why isn’t the kid called Duke, Earl, or even Prince?)

If Baron needs a role model, he just has to look at Dad to see a cheater, groper, tax evader, disreputable businessman, con artist, liar, and all-round ignoramus. Dad’s the whole package.

Everybody’s still wondering why Comey decided to throw shade on Hillary now, without having a single fact to present.

What I wonder is why the FBI stopped at Weiner’s PC. Why don’t they just seize EVERYBODY’S email and read until they can find anything, anywhere, to indict Hillary on something?

That’s what this witch hunt has been about all along. Sure, Hillary’s staff talked a lot of smack, but no threat to national security ever came of any of it.

As for the WikiLeaks email dumps, who knows what’s real?

But no matter what the FBI finds, no minds will change. Anyone who didn’t know who they were voting for before this week is probably too stupid to find their polling place anyway.

And while we’re making comparisons, I’ll stick with Trump and Hitler. On Election Day, as the big screen TVs flashing the election results of doom close in on Trump, maybe he’ll think about what Hitler did when it became clear he was the world’s biggest loser and there was no escaping it.

As Trump himself said when he dog-whistled for some gun nut to kill Hillary, that would be a “horrible day.”

BONUS: Here’s John’s Oliver’s hilarious take on the email connection to Weiner.


Why the Media is Not Biased Against Trump

October 28, 2016

By Adele

First, let me state that Cats Working is biased against Donald Trump. We want him shredded bigly on Election Day. (Or is that big league?) He’s a menace to humanity and he must be stopped.

But I’m not the media. I’m a cat.

With that said, a new AP poll revealed 56% of likely voters think media reporting is biased against Trump.

I think those voters are wrong.

Any perceived bias (i.e., negativity) toward Trump is created by Trump himself. The media can barely keep up with the torrent of lies and insults that spew from Trump and his surrogates. In fact, some vile nonsense has gotten short shrift because it was so quickly followed up by something even worse.

If that seems like biased reporting, then Trump could flip the election’s tone 180 if he’d stop calling everyone “horrible,” a “disgrace,” or a “disaster.”

And if by bias people think Hillary’s not getting her share of nasty reporting, it’s because Hillary doesn’t play victim and lash out with insults every waking moment. Sure, she’s had scandals, and they’ve been dissected ad nauseam. The press shouldn’t mine the archives just to publish equal dirt.

Trump and his crowd are the ones talking and tweeting crazy stuff faster than anyone can absorb it.

Through the primaries and the Republication convention, the media gave Trump a pass, reporting on him as if he were a mature, rational adult who said unusual things. It’s only in the past few months that most journalists have acknowledged that Trump is an evil, bat-shit, raving lunatic.

He probably doesn’t even want to be president. This whole nightmare has been him seeing how many suckers loyal supporters he can put the squeeze on to enrich the Trump family and its businesses. He hasn’t — and won’t — give the $100 million he promised to his campaign.

In fact, Karen has received two letters from Trump, begging us for money! How pathetic is that?

Only since the debates has the media focused on accompanying Trump’s bizarro claims with disclaimers when he provides no proof or evidence, which is always. Before that, he went unchallenged.

Calling out this demented, sleazy geezer on his fact-free rants isn’t bias, it’s journalists finally doing their jobs, and it’s about time.

All signs indicate that Trump’s going down in hot orange flames November 8. I hope Sarah Palin’s preparing to hand off the crown as the most shameless, money-grubbing loser in American political history. She’s about to get Trumped.


Nasty Women, Let’s Sink Trump

October 25, 2016

By Karen

First, apologies for being MIA lately. I wore myself to a nub staying up many midnights watching this train wreck of an election unfold. So I went to sea last week and kept the TV off until the third debate Oct. 19 and the Al Smith dinner for Catholic charities the following night. Donald Trump didn’t disappoint with his many indefensible remarks.

The world owes Trump gratitude for calling Hillary Clinton “a nasty woman” during the debate. It was galvanizing, coming from a man whose actions and words have been far nastier and degrading to more people than any other candidate in U.S. history.

Even in attempting to fend off charges of groping and lip-locking female strangers, Trump can’t resist using demeaning language like “Look at her!” insinuating that his accusers are so ugly, he’d never touch them, let alone stick his hands up their skirts or his tongue down their throats.

Slathering on more irony, Trump doesn’t get how he failed spectacularly when he trotted out that gaggle of aging women to rehash similar accusations against Bill Clinton.

Since all parties involved are in or near their dotage, it’s been just pathetic. But it serves to reveal that Trump views all women as objects to be used in whatever disgusting way he wishes.

I hope calling Hillary “a nasty woman” drives the decisive nail into Trump’s political coffin. Women must vote against him in droves. Let’s send him back to his golden tower so he can bring the avalanche of ridiculous lawsuits he’s promised against everyone who’s crossed him, including the New York Times and all his female accusers.

Here’s Megyn Kelly (the Fox reporter Trump said “had blood coming out of her whatever”) trying to nail Trump’s hired gun, Kellyanne Conway, on Trump’s unpopularity with women, and this was even BEFORE the Access Hollywood tape, ensuing accusations, and the last two debates.

But Elizabeth Warren stated women’s case against Trump best in New Hampshire yesterday, so let’s watch her…

Warren made other good points about the irrational down-ticket support that continued to cling to Trump even after he repeatedly disgraced himself, so here’s her full speech if you’re interested…


Donald Trump is Toast

October 10, 2016

By Karen

George Bernard Shaw said, “I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it.”

That sums up the second debate between Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump. It was the highlight of Trump’s weekend of being trampled in a Republican stampede for the exits after a 2005 Access Hollywood tape surfaced of Trump talking like a pig about women.

Donald’s dirt is dropping so fast now, who can keep up?

Trump started out more subdued, but it couldn’t last. He was soon pacing, scowling, interrupting, whining that the moderators were unfair and not picking on Hillary enough, and sniffling 80 times (by my count).

Turns out sniffling is his debate style. I noted that he often sniffed when he was about to, or had just, said something untruthful or particularly nasty.

Die-hard Trump lovers think he won, excusing the rehash of threadbare old stump content, complete with the usual exaggerations and boasts, fact-free and plan-free.

Now that Trump is engineering every week to be a bad week, his campaign is down for the count.

In a last gasp, he dug up some women from Bill Clinton’s past. Trump wanted to seat them with his family so they’d be front and center, but it didn’t happen. Sex scandals lose their fizz when all the players are grandparents.

Besides, Bill’s not running for president. Whatever Hillary said about those women, she said as a wife who’d been cheated on. Did Trump really think THEY were the victims?

As a ploy to embarrass and disgrace Hillary, it was a resounding fail.

But in the face of Trump’s blistering idiocy, Hillary showed a leader’s temperament and restraint, even as Trump persisted in slouching around behind her like a bratty kid.

Trump managed to maintain a poker-face while he sang the same old song: Everything’s the biggest “mess” and “disaster” in “the history of the world,” and Trump will make it all rainbows and lollipops for the very people he’s bashed — blacks, Muslims, Mexicans. “What have you got to lose?”

One of Trump’s best lows came when a Muslim woman asked him about labeling Muslims a threat to the country. Trump responded that he’d welcome Muslims if they’d just agree to spy on and rat out each other, then in the next breath he called for “extreme vetting” because Muslim immigration is “the great Trojan horse of our time.”

After the debate, Hillary shook Trump’s hand when she probably could have slapped the spray tan off his face, and then she approached the town hall participants to pose for selfies.

Trump made a beeline for his family because his show was over. Literally.


Tim Kaine, You Muffed It!

October 5, 2016

By Adele

What made Tim Kaine go all Trumpy? Within the first five minutes of the VP debate, he had my tail in a fluff and I began counting his interruptions. The Daily Mail heard 70. I got 75 for Kaine and 39 for Pence.

The result: Pence came off as calm and mature, Kaine a two-legged pit bull.

Pence started out badly by thanking “Norwood” University instead of Longwood. And soon after, when he was asked about Trump’s temperament, he dodged with some crap about Hillary as secretary of state, and then threw in a line about Hillary and Kaine’s “avalanche of insults.”

I think he repeated that phrase again, and if it’s a new linguistic jab of Trump’s, let me recommend the ONLY appropriate response to it…

“Just listen to yourself,” accompanied by the indulgent smile you’d give a child’s imaginary friend.

On immigration, Pence kept calling immigrants “criminal aliens” to warm the hearts of Muslims and Mexicans.

Pence even insulted Trump’s BFF, calling Vladimir Putin the “small and bullying leader of Russia.”

And every time Kaine cited direct, outrageous statements from Trump, all recorded on video, Pence shook his head and denied they were said.

At that point, Kaine should have sat back, shut up, and let Pence dig his own fact-free grave. Instead, he kept giving Pence opportunities to spin more baseless fantasies.

Pence’s “support” for Trump consisted of denying almost everything Trump has ever said or done. He chose instead to calmly lay out his own plans for a Trump presidency.

And that’s how Pence somehow won this battle. But he probably lost the war because he’ll pay dearly for momentarily pushing Trump out of the spotlight and raising the bar on Trump for his next debate with Hillary October 9.

My favorite Pence nonsense line was in closing when he promised, “Trump’s entire career has been about building. People are going to see real change after DECADES of just talking about it.”

Like nobody remembers George W. Bush was president for EIGHT of the years he’s referring to, destroying entire countries.

Kaine had the facts on his side, and he knew them. His policy message was upbeat. He hoisted Trump by his own petard MANY times. But he blew it with the incessant interrupting.

Trump live-tweeted during the debate, but I ignored that sideshow. Now I see that he called Virginia a “failed state.”

And you can kiss this failed state’s electoral votes buh-bye, Trumpy-poo.

Basically, Pence was deemed the winner because he interrupted only half as much as Kaine, even though he mostly disavowed all that Trump stands for.

Pence had better savor his victory while he can. There’s probably a closet in Trump Tower with his name on it where Mike will be spending the duration of the campaign.


Post-Debate: Donald Trump’s One Chewed-Up Cheeto

September 27, 2016

By Adele

Hope you tuned in for the debate last night to see the beginning of the end of Donald Trump’s run for president.

He started out fairly calm, but with no teleprompter to keep him grounded, Hillary soon got under his hide like a cat burrowing into a warm blankie. That caused him to retreat to his comfort zone, which means interrupting, bragging, lying, repeating himself, and mostly keeping a safe distance from facts.

And sniffling and guzzling water. What was up with that? Does cocaine need a chaser? I couldn’t take my eyes off his nose, waiting for a bat to escape the cave and gross out Lester Holt. “Joe Blo” on YouTube kindly compiled Trump’s nose action…

Later, Trump nonsensically claimed his “defective microphone” was the culprit. How? Did he get confused and try to snort it?

His hapless running mate, Mike Pence, claimed today on CBS This Morning that he never noticed Trump’s labored breathing. Sure, the world began tweeting about it simultaneously last night because Trump WASN’T sniffling.

Another hilarious moment came when Trump said, “I don’t believe she does have the stamina. To be president of this country, you need tremendous stamina,” while hanging onto his podium for dear life with both hands. He used his podium to prop himself up through much of the debate, while Hillary stood under her own power.

Hillary did a masterful job of holding her ground, letting Trump’s monosyllabic grunts and rambling accusations roll right off. You knew from her smile that she was picturing some idiot child playing grownup in a suit and tie whenever she looked at him.

I stand by my prediction that Trump won’t do any more debates, and his BFF, Rudy Giuliani, agrees it’s a bad idea. Trump knows now that he’s incapable of doing the prep necessary to get the best of a policy wonk like Hillary. To beat her, he’d have to become things he’s not — reasonable, rational, and coherent — and sustain it for 90 minutes.

Here are two other analyses of the debate I agree with. Seth Meyers brought out some great points…

And so did Trevor Noah…


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