One Inch of Snow, Richmond Paralyzed

January 27, 2015

By Cole

It’s noon and I’m sitting on my cozy kitty perch watching snowflakes meander down, even though our local weather gurus said the snowfall would end by 9-10 a.m., tops.

Their inaccuracy aside, I’m kind of embarrassed to be a Southern domestic shorthair today.

Richmond must have really, really, REALLY wanted to be part of the “big snow event” that just whumped the Northeast. When we woke up this morning, local meteorologists on the 3 major networks (ABC, CBS, NBC) refused to cede to the national morning shows, which were, presumably, discussing actual blizzard conditions north of here.

Instead, our guys stood steadfastly in front of maps showing puny and fast-dwindling snowstorms across the area, trying to whip us all into a frenzy that there was something life-threatening afoot.

They had reporters in thick parkas and knit caps posted all over town with little rulers, futilely trying to find somewhere to measure an inch of snow.

Even the school districts embraced the madness and canceled school at the last minute so the little darlings could stay curled up with their toasty Xboxes, rather than battle “treacherous conditions” in some feckless pursuit of an education.

Richmond “International” Airport canceled some flights. Morning commuters were urged to stay off the roads unless they absolutely had to go out, so many vacation days were probably called in for nothing.

I say “nothing” because, by 11 a.m., our residential backstreet had no trace of snow. Karen didn’t shovel because the driveway was already clean, too.

People, get a grip. We got less than an inch. OK, maybe an inch in some spots. But a blizzard?

Adele calls this a classic “head up our own ass” moment. There’s nothing more embarrassing than watching fellow Southerners throw a hissy fit over a mere dusting, while those who are seriously butt-deep in snow aren’t whining.


Afterthoughts on “The Taste” Season 3

January 26, 2015

By Karen

Yes, I swore off Anthony Bourdain’s cooking competition, The Taste, after Season 2, but it pulled me back in. But I’m no Bourdainiac like Vanessa, that creepy fan girl on his team who cooked only to please her Tony.

Season 3 wrapped up last week, and I saw it all. Bourdain was a contender, but his last team member, Eric, got knocked out just before the grand finale, leaving it to Ludo and Marcus.

The premise is still ridiculous, but ABC’s pumping the hyperbole, calling Bourdain a “culinary legend” and the show an “international juggernaut.”

Bourdain’s too young to be legendary, but I’ll give him juggernaut. The Taste format is being reproduced worldwide. I hope Tony and Nigella get a nice slice of all that franchising.

What I liked…

  • Bourdain as host. He comes across as reasonable, likable, caring, the perfect foil for tantrum-throwing, trashcan-kicking Ludo.
  • The person who does Tony’s hair deserves an Emmy for confiscating his hair gel and ending the wet, mangy dog look.
  • Marcus Samuelsson. What’s not to like? He’s a cordial, articulate guy with an interesting background who knows his stuff.
  • Gabe as winner. He had the skills and the most favorite spoons. It was a nice touch that the judges allegedly didn’t know the winner themselves until they pushed the last button for their favorite.
  • They let us get to know the cooks better, although I felt like I knew Jen, Ludo’s token home cook, too well. At times I wanted to slap her even more than he did.

What left me wondering…

  • Where’s Bourdain’s wedding ring? He never wore it once, and it’s been missing elsewhere I’ve seen him. I hope it’s just a jiu jitsu thing, now that he’s in training.
  • Why doesn’t Nigella look in a mirror and kill the person who dresses her? In one early episode, her neckline was so low, her bra hung out. By mid-season when she was plumping up, she wore big horizontal stripes. And for the finale, they dressed her in full-on Morticia Addams. Nigella’s got a beautiful face, but she’s voluptuous all over and looks like haggis on legs poured into tight dresses she can hardly walk or sit in.
  • Why is every episode 2 hours long, even after they’re down to a few cooks? Didn’t ABC learn anything from over-milking Dancing with the Stars?

What I still don’t like…

  • Ludo, the once and future douche. He was more dickish than ever.
  • Home cooks pitted against professionals. Once again, Nigella was rendered moot almost immediately because her team of home cooks got creamed. No home cook has ever won.
  • A finale that dragged on for three rounds. Two would have been plenty.

So, I ended this season OK with The Taste, and I’d watch Season 4, although I don’t think it’s renewed yet. But I’ve got a new favorite: Master Chef Junior.

Stay tuned…


ENOUGH About the Footballs Already!

January 23, 2015

By Adele

Here we go again with another big “scandal” in football. The New England Patriots won a game playing with soft balls. Oh, the horror, the stain on humanity!

It was the top story last night on NBC’s Nightly News with Brian Williams. It was the top story this morning on the Today Show and CBS This Morning.

If the United States’ shameful absence from the recent mass demonstration in Paris wasn’t a clear enough signal to the world how far up our own asses our heads are these days, then anyone tuning in to what’s passing for “news” here right now would see it.

While Americans agonize over whether beloved Patriots quarterback Tom Brady knew his balls were soft, here’s what else we’re largely ignoring…

  • Netanhayu’s in cahoots with Boehner to make Obama seem out of the loop on foreign relations (as if Obama needs any help)
  • Islamic terrorists are about to behead 2 Japanese hostages
  • Measles are making a comeback because we allow idiot parents to not get their kids vaccinated

Yeah, yeah, I know. “Deflategate,” “Air of Deception,” or whatever cutesy name you want to call it, has big implications for the upcoming — oh, gasp, swoon! — SUPERBOWL!!!

And once again I’m going to remind you that football is a GAME, people. It’s not real. Never has been. Anyone who makes a living off football is one lucky SOB and a leech whose “job” is sucking bucks out of fools willing to pour money into it (i.e., fans).

There’s NOTHING about football that has any business dominating the news — ever.

Fine, anyone who must waste time on sports nonsense, go ahead and hash out with your ilk your burning “issues” on the sports pages of newspapers or in online forums. Discuss it all you want on ESPN. But the mainstream media needs to STOP rubbing the rest of our noses in this crap.

Any country that inflates men in tight little pants who prance around a field carrying soft balls into a national crisis is a country that’s going downhill fast.


Only One Appropriate Response to North Korea

December 19, 2014

By Cole

Does North Korea’s childish hijacking of the satirical comedy, The Interview, remind anybody else of that annual Dr. Seuss holiday special, How the Grinch Stole Christmas?

If you’ll recall, the big, bad Grinch whose heart was two sizes too small crept into the village of Whoville on Christmas Eve and stole all the trees, decorations, and presents.

And what did the Whos do when they woke up robbed? They celebrated Christmas anyway.

As Americans, we need to take a page from the Whos’ playbook.

Granted, The Interview’s best moments may have already been shown in the promo clips before Sony shelved the film. But since when do we let a Kim Jong-un tell us what’s entertainment?

Or cower at a threat from faceless hackers that reads like a satire of itself:

Warning

We will clearly show it to you at the very time and places “The Interview” be shown, including the premiere, how bitter fate those who seek fun in terror should be doomed to.

Soon all the world will see what an awful movie Sony Pictures Entertainment has made.

The world will be full of fear.

Remember the 11th of September 2001.

We recommend you to keep yourself distant from the places at that time.

(If your house is nearby, you’d better leave.)

Whatever comes in the coming days is called by the greed of Sony Pictures Entertainment.

All the world will denounce the SONY.

More to come…

George Clooney is right. If we let North Korea win this point, where does it end? We might as well shelve the First Amendment.

The movie chains and Sony need to grow a pair and release The Interview on Christmas Day — in theaters, on DVD, and on demand. And movie-goers should make like Whos and watch it — and laugh even at the lame parts.

If Kim Jong-un can’t find it in that shriveled little raisin he calls a heart to laugh with us, then we can laugh at him.

PS to the hackers: If you want Americans to take your threats seriously, learn English.


The Votes Are In: Racist and Stupid Win

November 6, 2014

By Cole

With approval for the Republican-smothered Congress standing at 14% in September, what did voters do this week? They gave Republicans an even bigger majority in the House AND handed them the Senate.

After 6 years of thwarting and obstructing Obama at every turn, on every issue, this Congress is poised to be remembered as the most useless one in American history.

Yet Rush LimpPaw is declaring the election a mandate for Republicans to do nothing more for the next 2 years than to STOP OBAMA.

There are only 2 logical reasons voters would want to perpetuate this insanity:

1) They approve of Republicans’ gratuitous, often irrational, opposition to Obama, which makes them suspects as an accessory to racial bigotry.

2) They are too self-absorbed or stupid to comprehend that Republicans, Wall Street, and Big Business are, and always will be, BFFs. If there’s one certainty in politics, it’s that the GOP will screw the little guy financially, occupationally, medically, educationally, and environmentally to further its own self-interests.

Earlier this year in Virginia, many Democrats temporarily crossed over to the dark side to help rid Washington of that odious Republican fixture, Congressman Eric Cantor. But then they couldn’t get one of their own elected in his place. So now our congressman is a political neophyte and extreme right-winger named Dave Brat. The best Virginia can hope for is that he gets squashed at the bottom of the pecking order.

Cantor wasted no time cashing in on his defeat. The Wall Street crooks he courted throughout his political career graced him with a prestigious job in investment banking carrying a 7-figure annual compensation package that he has scant qualifications for.

It’s called showing gratitude, Republican-style.

All of us at Cats Working are disgusted with the mid-term election outcome, but there may be a silver lining.

Republicans are now perfectly positioned to self-destruct. They think they’ve got a mandate to keep on keeping on — scheming ways to disenfranchise women, gays, minorities, immigrants, and anyone who isn’t an old white fat cat — or to continue doing absolutely nothing, which has become their second nature.

With control of the House and Senate, they can keep that black cat in the White House under their thumb, where they think an inferior being like him belongs.

They can marshal all the proponents of racism and gun violence who call themselves “conservatives” to help them drag this country back to the Dark Ages on social issues.

They can keep taxing and whittling away at the middle class to help the rich get richer (and skim a generous percentage off the top for themselves) until there’s no one left for them to rob.

They think this is all a “recipe for success.”

Go ahead, Republicans, keep it up. In 2016, the looks on your faces when the next president is a Democrat are going to be priceless.


Football Players Behave Badly and that’s NEWS?

September 16, 2014

By Cole

Earlier this year, the media couldn’t report enough about racism in basketball, as if nothing else in the world mattered. Now it’s off-the-field brutality in football.

Baltimore Ravens player Ray Rice clocked his fiancée in an elevator, knocked her out, and dragged her off like some caveman, and it was all caught on tape.

It wasn’t until video of the actual punch leaked out that the NFL’s male brass were shamed into meting out some actual discipline against Rice.

Rice is now unemployed, the woman he socked is now his wife, and she blames everybody for embarrassing and humiliating them. But if Mrs. Rice thinks her husband’s aggression was a one-off and she’s willing to risk getting decked again the next time she pisses him off, who are we to judge?

Rice being exposed as a batterer has sent football’s skeleton’s flying out of the closet. I’ve seen so many reports of NFL players raping and beating women and children, I can’t begin to count or keep them all straight.

These are brawny guys who train every day to be vicious brutes on the field. It’s disingenuous to be shocked when they practice their lethal skills off the field.

It’s like being surprised when a pit bull who’s been raised to win dog-fights chews up a baby.

If anybody should be shocked, it’s the players themselves. The public LOVES watching them be savage. That’s football. Men crashing in to each other to inflict as much pain as possible, while leaving everyone intact enough to stand up and do it again.

For a handsome living, these guys willingly get their brains scrambled and their bodies broken. Why is everyone stunned when they become unable to discern their “enemies” in the game — the pretend war — from their “enemies” in reality? Why do we expect them to be able to switch their inner bully on and off?

All you football fans who claim to be appalled by these abusive players’ behavior have only yourselves to blame. Your ticket purchases finance their lessons in assault, and your cheers and adulation egg them on to commit it.

If you don’t like the result, then find a less bloodthirsty sport to squander your weekends on.


Obama and the ISIS Double Standard

September 11, 2014

By Cole

After two grisly beheadings, President Obama has finally stopped dithering and plans to swat at ISIS with air strikes and squander more money and men to train local troops and rebels who, at any moment, might toss their American-made weapons to ISIS and run like little girls.

It wouldn’t matter if Obama decided to send 300,000 ground troops to rampage through Syria and Iraq (again). Ten years from now, a fresh generation of twisted Muslims will still be committing mayhem.

The only real fix here is for Muslims in the region to decide enough’s enough, unify against their own lunatic fringe, and stamp it out themselves.

But when do Muslims ever do that? Never. Instead, they just follow our lead.

The U.S. has no grounds for complaint about ISIS when we tolerate — legally sanction and even glorify— terrorism just as brutal right here at home.

Reading excerpts from Obama’s speech today, I got a hearty laugh at these priceless gems:

“We will hunt down terrorists who threaten our country, wherever they are.”

“This is a core principle of my presidency: If you threaten America, you will find no safe haven.”

Buddy Boy, where have you been? Look out the White House windows. Our streets run red, too. Our terrorists are “Defenders of the 2nd Amendment.” Newspapers across America chronicle their atrocities every day. They’re a band of thugs, sane and insane, armed to the teeth, who may randomly mow down adults, children, and pets in their homes and in public places.

NOBODY is safe from being senselessly killed anywhere, any time.

How is this any different from what ISIS does? Are you saying one man cutting off another man’s head is worse than a 9-year-old girl blowing off her shooting instructor’s head with an Uzi?

And here it’s all perfectly legal. Our terrorists only face penalties if they get caught and their attorneys can’t lie well enough to convince a judge and jury they DIDN’T do it.

Why are we in a lather about ISIS when, if they were here, they could get their hands on assault weapons and continue killing, with the added assurance that a good chunk of the population would just shrug it off and defend their right to be armed?

The world is in a sorry state when civilized nations with good reason to fear ISIS look to the United States for leadership in confronting irrational evil.


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