Let’s Pretend Trump Did Go to the Capitol

July 18, 2022

By Karen

We’ve heard that Trump wasn’t allowed to accompany his armed mob to the Capitol on January 6. But what if he had? Let’s imagine…

The White House and Capitol are 2 miles apart, about 1.995 miles farther than Trump’s ability to “march” anywhere, so he had to be driven. In this tale, his SUV had loyal Secret Service agents, guys Trump could count on to wipe their phones and obliterate all incriminating texts around 1/6.

After his speech at the Ellipse, when Trump barked, “I’m the fucking president and I can do whatever I want. Drive me to the Capitol,” he didn’t have to grab the steering wheel or strangle anyone.

[By the way, Trump driving himself to the Capitol might have been a crime in itself because his New York driver’s license expired in June 2020.

In the heat of his reelection campaign and daily coronavirus briefings, do you think he renewed it?]

His Secret Service detail said, “Yes, Sir, at once, Sir!” (They knew he loves being called “Sir.”) The SUV inched through the rag-tag crowd filling the street, so the usual 10-minute drive took longer. But that gave Proud Boys and Oath Keepers, who’d already spent hours crashing through the Capitol Police’s first lines of defense, more time to smash the unreinforced windows, which they’d located thanks to Trump’s sycophants giving them tours to case the place.

The SUV took Trump right to the Capitol steps to spare the germophobe from having to walk through the unwashed masses he loved precisely because of their poor hygiene. Just climbing those steps in shoe lifts and a girdle would be taxing enough for Trump.

Trump was anticipating his High Noon showdown on the House floor with Speaker Pelosi when he declared all vote-counting over and told that bitch, “You’re fired!”

A phalanx of more Secret Service agents materialized to form a human V in front of Trump to clear his path up the stairs, yelling, “Stand down, but stand by!” When rioters glimpsed the dead ferret on Trump’s head, they hailed their leader’s arrival, stepping back and holding their flag-spears aloft in salute.

Once inside the Capitol, Trump strode to the House chamber expecting to find Nancy Pelosi in hysterics and Democrat cowards bouncing off the walls in terror. But it was empty except for vagrants ransacking desks and a bare-chested nut wearing face paint and horns standing at the Speaker’s chair.

Enraged that Pelosi had eluded him, Trump screamed, “Fuck you, Nervous Nancy!” and stomped out.

In the underground garage where Mike Pence and his family were hiding came word that Trump was in the building. “Oh, Mother, he’s come at last to save us!” Pence exclaimed as he headed for the stairs.

From the top of the Capitol steps, Trump ordered some SS agents to lead “his people, but only the armed ones” to where Congress was hiding, because he wasn’t about to squander this opportunity to rid himself of Schumer, Pelosi and their Democrat scum.

Looking over the mob, Trump was inspired to deliver an impromptu speech (which would have come out as, “Stop the steal, rigged election, fake news, witch hunt, hoax, fight like hell, shifty Schiff, Hillary’s emails!” on endless loop). But Mike Pence ran toward him, with Mother waddling in his wake.

“Praise the Lord, Sir! My prayers have been answered. You’re here to deliver us from evil and make America great again!” Pence cried, dropping to his knees at Trump’s feet.

Trump looked down and replied, his voice dripping with contempt, “Mike, are you going to do the right thing or wuss out and be a pussy?”

Panicked and confused after fleeing from the mob, Pence momentarily forgot what Trump was asking about. That nanosecond of hesitation cost him everything.

Trump gestured to an obese, bearded clot of knuckle-draggers standing nearby and said, “Proud Boys, you know what to do.”

Trumps goons grabbed the still-kneeling Pence and dragged him screaming down the Capitol steps. When Pence saw the gallows, he went limp and the Proud Boys easily threw him onto the platform. Trump and Mother Pence had caught up and watched, but only one of them in horror.

As the noose fell around Pence’s neck, TV cameramen in trees a safe distance away broadcast worldwide his lips babbling a final prayer. The next moment, the Proud Boys yanked the rope.

Trump heard the satisfying snap of his VP’s neck as he struggled in midair. When Mike went still, Trump gave his signature thumbs-up.

“Mike got what he deserved.”

The mob roared and began chanting, “Nancy Next, Nancy Next!”

But Pelosi was on the phone with General Mark Milley, who deployed the U.S. Army, which arrived to find Trump smirking amid general jubilation and dancing around Mike Pence’s dangling corpse.

As the troops landed, Trump’s SUV whisked him away because he didn’t want blood splashing on his black cashmere winter coat.

The rioters, now finding themselves leaderless and under deadly threat from highly trained soldiers armed for combat, lunged at the army with their flag-spears. Concealed weapons came out and began firing, including AR-15s, of course.

Screams filled the air as heads and body parts flew all over the Capitol grounds, soaking everyone in unspeakable gore. Both sides suffered so many casualties, the epic Civil War confrontation at Antietam will henceforth be remembered as a garden party.

Since it was all broadcast live, the whole world watched the U.S. president lead a barbaric attack on the government he’d sworn a sacred oath to protect and defend.

Trump, now safely back in the White House after a quick stop at a McDonald’s drive-through, watched TV as he scarfed down three Big Macs and two large orders of fries swimming in ketchup. When he flung his porcelain plate against the wall, as 1/6 Committee witness Cassidy Hutchinson later described, it was not in rage, but celebratory.

Trump reveled in his self-made “American carnage” all afternoon, flipping from station to station. He replayed many times favorite moments when his people blew U.S. Army troops to smithereens.

It wasn’t until dusk, when his people were too hungry and exhausted to continue fighting, that Trump called a press conference. His message was simple and from the heart:

“You’re all very special people and I love you, but you can go home now. Thank you for your hard work. You are true patriots. I am going to reward you by giving you what you want more than anything in the world. I declare Donald J. Trump president for life.

“As of this moment, I’m dissolving Congress and firing all the Joint Chiefs. All branches of the military, including my most brilliant Space Force, now report directly to their Supreme Commander, Donald J. Trump. I declare martial law throughout the land. The 2020 election never happened, and we’ll never need an election again. Thank you, and good night.”

Trump took no questions.

As the rioters packed up, Congress returned to find their building in shambles, including urine in every corner and human feces all over walls, paintings, and statues.

Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer stood together, looking through a broken window at the silhouette of Mike Pence framed by moonlight, hanging from the gallows. If they still had jobs, they would have drawn up a list of possible members for a committee, which would then decide if the events of 1/6 needed to be investigated to determine if it was even remotely conceivable that Trump or anyone with him had possibly committed any crimes.

Mitch McConnell finally felt safe enough with all the Democrats gone to poke his head out of his shell and Kevin McCarthy pulled his thumb out of his mouth. Even though now also unemployed, they chanted in unison, “All Hail our Glorious Leader!”

Trump left the Supreme Court and Justice Department intact because he needed them to enforce his will and persecute his enemies. In an odd twist, he appointed Merrick Garland his new attorney general because he knew Garland would never dare to make a political fuss by charging anybody with anything. And he never did.

Pence’s killers faced no punishment. The rioters who slaughtered Capitol Police and Army troops were exonerated by Trump’s next executive order, which stated, “Since the United States loves the Second Amendment more than life itself, everyone must own a gun and murder is no longer a crime.”

Nobody lived happily ever after, including Trump. After about a year, dementia had reduced his mind to such mush, he couldn’t remember he’d ever been president. But the damage he’d been allowed to do wiped the United States of America right off the map.


Thoughts on Jan. 6 Hearings So Far

June 22, 2022

By Karen

We’ve had four hearings to date. I’ve watched every minute because this is too important, and I don’t trust TV pundits’ recaps’ accuracy.

Photo: wmur.com

I feel as if Trump’s gaslighting is now coming from journalists (I’m looking at you, Maddow and Reid) who keep using words like “shocking” and “bombshell” to describe the hearings. Have they forgotten their reporting since 1/6, or are we watching different hearings?

This cognitive dissonance spreads like a fungus because with the hearings foolishly held during business hours, working people rely on pundits, who regurgitate only what they consider highlights. That is, viewer bait, not necessarily important stuff.

The baseline fact is that Trump & Co. committed sedition by trying to overturn the election through coercion and insurrection. It was as illegal as it appeared. These hearings are just gilding the lily, dumping on us and the Justice Department an additional mountain of actionable evidence that should send Trump & Co. to prison forever.

As for the hearings themselves, I’m so over-saturated with Trump and his crimes, I absorb all information through the filter of, “Is this something I didn’t already know?” The answer is mostly no.

From the first prime-time hearing, my major takeaway was that the Proud Boys and Oath Keepers arrived at the Capitol hours early and skipped Trump’s speech so they could begin the rampage while Trump whipped reinforcements into a frenzy.

Bottom line: The insurrection was planned and coordinated with the White House, not spontaneous.

A subsequent hearing revealed that Trump has bilked $250 million from his cult for a nonexistent “Defense Fund.” He probably continues to this day because no one’s stopping him. He’s already stolen millions from his Inaugural Fund, gifts from foreign leaders, boxes of top-secret documents, and overcharged the Secret Service for profit, so why not?

Every hearing reiterates that Trump was told ad nauseam the election wasn’t stolen. They’ve also confirmed that Rudy Giuliani is a washed-up drunk, Jeffrey Clark and John Eastman plotted treason, and they’re all low-hanging, rotten fruit, but Merrick Garland coulda-shoulda-didn’t arrest them all months ago.

A truly sickening unintended consequence has been the glorification of Mike Pence and other Republicans who have testified. The truth is that Pence scoured every possibility to proclaim Trump the winner. But since he and all these witnesses had the sense to see prison looming if they obeyed Trump, they “did the right thing,” a.k.a, their jobs. Period.

Also, as the plot unfolded, with the exception of Arizona’s House Speaker Russell Bowers, who issued a press release no one saw, they all publicly said NOTHING to alert the country to Trump’s coup attempt.

Any other day, they’re still greedy, selfish, polluting, misogynistic, gun-loving, child-hating racists who want only to see white men owning and running the entire country again.

One huge takeaway from Georgia’s Secretary of State Brad Raffensperger: 28,000 ballots had NO vote for president, but did vote for Republicans down-ticket. Had all those voted for Trump, it would have been 173% of the 11,780 Trump demanded Raffensperger “find.”

Bottom line: Georgians didn’t want Trump reelected.

Why hasn’t this been a huge headline, media?

Raffensperger also told questioner Adam Schiff that Georgia found only four instances of votes from dead people. I expected Schiff to ask, “And who were those votes for?”

We’ll never know because Schiff let it drop. I’m going to take a wild guess and say Trump, because most of the few fraudulent votes anyone has found were for Trump.

That’s one small nail in the coffin, but a crucial one in driving home the point that the MAGA cult’s moral bankruptcy matches Trump’s own, and is even more dangerous by sheer numbers.

Yesterday’s hearing featured two black female Georgia vote counters. Trump and Giuliani have repeatedly named and reviled them with false accusations of vote tampering, which has stirred up the MAGA cult to have them living in fear for their lives.

This is a dot the media is doing a poor job of connecting. Trump’s continued freedom to spew lies is still inspiring bottom-feeding, brainwashed, armed scum to commit violence for him. Like the 1/6 insurrectionists, these people need to be tracked down now, arrested and dealt the most severe consequences the law allows, because nothing else is getting through to them.

Which brings me back to Attorney General Merrick Garland. I was incensed to see him almost giddy when asked if he’s watching the hearings…

Yeah, he’s watching, but is he DOING anything? Well, just yesterday, Garland hopped over to Ukraine to promise them he’ll deliver justice to their war criminals.

Bottom line: When the 1/6 hearings end, Garland had better deliver justice to the traitors in his own country who his inaction is enabling to STILL plot a coup, or he and the rest of us are all fucked.


How Anthony Bourdain Came to Be an American

November 11, 2021

Researched by James McNiff

Veterans Day feels like the fitting occasion to share the story of Anthony Bourdain’s paternal grandfather, Pierre. Jim McNiff originally submitted this as a comment, and Cats Working has edited it for clarity and length. He found his facts and photos at Ancestry.com and Newspapers.com.

James McNiff is a health care industry retiree who now does genealogical research on famous people for fun. His work has appeared in The Boston Globe and the Irish Echo (New York). He also self-publishes some of his findings and makes them available on Amazon.com.

Now, let’s learn about Anthony Bourdain’s paternal grandparents. But first, Jim sets the scene…

National WW1 Memorial Debuts in Washington, D.C.
Smithsonian Magazine, April 16, 2021

President Biden delivered a speech virtually, saying…

“More than 100 years have passed since WWI ended, but the legacy of those doughboys sailing off to war, and the values they fought to defend still live in our nation today.”

& & &

From The Stars and Stripes: American Expeditionary Forces Newspaper,
November 29,1918…

“One of the most heartening and cheering things about this whole business is the infinite capacity for mutual friends that exists between the children of France and the soldiers of America.”

* * *

On July 19,1919, the U.S.S. Kroonland sailed from Saint-Nazaire, France, with Army personnel onboard. The Treaty of Versailles had ended the Great War a few weeks earlier. Over 9 million soldiers would never return home. Another 21 million were injured, some beyond repair.

As soldiers streamed up the gangway, Quartermaster Sergeant Arthur H. Murphy waited until the last minute to personally escort a 13-year-old boy dressed in military garb. The child seemed to become invisible as he ascended the ramp; officers overseeing embarkation turned their backs as if he didn’t exist.

Next stop: Hoboken, New Jersey.

This is the U.S.S. Kroonland’s manifest for that sailing…

Officers294
Army Field Clerks3
Nurse, A.N.C.1
Civ., Q.M.C.1
Enlisted Men3,213
Total3,512
And 1 French boy

The New York Tribune reported the story of “doughboy” Pierre Michel Bourdain:

“The Kroonland had the distinction of bringing the youngest number of the A.E.F. (American Expeditionary Force). He is Michel Bourdain, 14 years old [his 14th birthday was actually two weeks after the article], dark-haired and blue-eyed. He stands 5’2” and wears the Sphinx head on the collar of his blouse, denoting a civilian interpreter. He says he speaks ‘Amurican,’ not ‘Engleesh.’ He was accompanied by Sergeant A.A. [sic] Murphy, who said he had the permission of the lad’s parents to adopt him.

“Bourdain helped his aged parents on a little farm at Maine-Loire, in Brittany.

[Pierre’s actual birthplace was a commune in Trelaze. The farm was on the outskirts of Angers, a larger city in western France. The Loire River was a few miles south. Trelaze is 440 miles due east of Port Saint-Nazaire.]

“When the 52nd Ammunition Train camped at [the farm], Pierre thought they were the finest soldiers he had ever seen and immediately started to help them in their marketing, using the little English he learned in school. The 52nd Ammunition Train moved on and was followed by the 54th Coast Artillery. Now called “Mike” by the soldiers, Pierre had accumulated quite a vocabulary and made himself invaluable to the new arrivals, none of whom spoke French. Soon they found that they could not do without him, so he was given a uniform and put on the payroll as a civilian employee interpreter at 225 francs a month.

“His parents moved to Bordeaux… The[y] opened a grocery store with Mike’s savings, which they realized was much more profitable than farming. Sergeant Murphy said that he is going to give Mike a good education.”

[Pierre’s father (Anthony Bourdain’s great-grandfather) is portrayed differently in various newspapers. Some say he died at Verdun. His birthplace quite frequently documented was Sao Pedro, Rio Grande do Sul, Brazil).

Pierre’s American Guardian: QMC Sergeant Arthur H. Murphy

Arthur Murphy was born in Duchess County, New York, in 1888. His father was from Virginia and his mother lived in New York.

By 1910, Arthur lived in Poughkeepsie and worked as a candy salesman, according to the census. He was single and never married. At age 29 he enlisted in the Army at Fort Slocum in New York.

He was promoted to sergeant in 1918 while overseas, where he spent 14 months and made a stop in the commune of Trelaze, where he met young Pierre Bourdain. By his discharge in 1919, he was a Quartermaster (QMC) Sergeant.

Upon returning to New York, Arthur, and presumably Pierre, lived in an Allerton House (later renamed Tatham). The Allerton Company rented homey apartments to young men to provide “a safe, stable and economical arrangement,” according to their owner.

Pierre’s Future Wife Arrives

When Pierre was 9 and still living in France, Gabrielle Riousse [Anthony Bourdain’s paternal grandmother] crossed the Atlantic on the Lafayette and passed through Ellis Island on December 6, 1915. She was 22, 4’11”, with chestnut hair and eyes, and her occupation was milliner [dressmaker]. She was visiting her older sister Berthe Corr, who lived with her husband James at West 91st Street in New York.

Gabrielle was born in Paris on February 25, 1893, to Alfred and Ernestine (Loret) Riousse.

When Gabrielle arrived in New York, her parents still lived in Paris. Alfred was from Alençon, Orne, home of Alençon lace, “the Queen of laces and lace for Queens.”

Gabrielle eventually returned to Paris, but came back to New York in February 1920. Her height then was recorded as 5’4”, and her profession switched to teacher.

Arthur Murphy Adopts Pierre

The New York Herald of September 9, 1919, provided this update…

Yank Adopts Lad He Met in France. Ex-Interpreter to Rear son of Verdun Defender

“There was something in the wistful face of little Pierre Michel Bourdain which haunted Sergeant Arthur H. Murphy of 143 East Thirty-ninth Street, on the occasion of their first meeting in France. From the time the eyes of the big sergeant, who was an interpreter in the American Expeditionary Forces, and little Pierre met in Bordeaux there developed a mutual attachment.

“Every opportunity found the doughboy and the French lad together, and little Pierre told his story. He was a half-orphan; his father having been one of the thousands of French poilus who defended Verdun against the German onslaughts at the cost of their lives. His mother, Mithilde Belliard Bourdain, was in poor circumstances, scarcely able to support her children and herself.

“When the time came for his departure from France, Sergeant Murphy obtained permission from the boy’s mother to have Pierre follow. There was a lot of trouble in getting this permission, but it was only the beginning of Sergeant Murphy’s difficulties. There was the official red tape to be untangled, and that also took time.

“Finally, however, young Bourdain arrived in New York and was welcomed by his doughboy friend Murphy, an accountant, who had returned to civilian life.

“It was fitting that the day on which Gen. Pershing returned to America should be made one of the happiest in little Pierre’s life. Surrogate Cohalan signed yesterday the papers of adoption for which Murphy had applied, and Pierre Michel Bourdain became Pierre Michel Murphy. He will reside with his foster-father and the latter’s widowed sister.”

[CW Note: This account contains some unverifiable factual discrepancies from the earlier New York Tribune story.]

1924 was the last year Pierre was noted living in New York before returning to France to visit his mother, now in Bordeaux. It’s unknown if Pierre had a falling out with Arthur Murphy, but when he returned to the U.S. on the Rousillon, his name was listed as Pierre Michel Bourdain, not Michel or Michael Murphy, and the person he knew in the States wasn’t Sergeant Murphy, but a neighbor named Mr. Wilgus.

Gabrielle Returns to New York While Pierre Sails to France

Gabrielle traveled to Paris twice between 1924 and 1926. Gabrielle lived at 57 East 58th Street, NYC (the Hotel Claredon), and her occupation was professor.

It’s unknown how or where Gabrielle and Pierre met. On October 3, 1928, she married Pierre M. Bourdain in Manhattan. She was 35, he was 23.

Anthony’s grandfather, Pierre Sr. Photo submitted by Thomas, Ancestry.com

Their son, whom they named Pierre [Anthony Bourdain’s father], was born December 12, 1929.

Gabrielle and her son Pierre made many trips over the years to Paris to visit Gabrielle’s father Alfred and her mother-in-law Mithilde, who had moved to La Teste de Buch in Gironde, France.

The 1930 census listed Pierre M. and Gabrielle as married and living at 675 West End Avenue in New York with baby Pierre. Pierre Sr. was then working as a merchant in a department store. Gabrielle was again a dressmaker.

Sadly, Pierre Sr. would die at age 28, when Anthony’s father was only 3 years old. Cause unknown.

From the records of “New York City Municipal Deaths”…

Name:Piere Bourdain
Sex:Male
Address:317 West 95 Street
Burial Date:1 Jan 1933
Death Date:31 Dec 1932
Death Place:Manhattan
Birth Year:1904
Birthplace:France
Marital Status:Married
Occupation:Manufacturer
Race:White
Spouse Name:Gabrielle Bourdain
Cemetery:Fresh Pond Crematory

PS: In the Oral Biography at the bottom of page 3, Christopher Bourdain mentions how their father would take him and Anthony to visit their grandmother Gabrielle in New York [presumably in the 1960s], but remembers only that she was very old and crippled by arthritis.

If not for whatever inspired Pierre Sr. to drop his adopted surname and reclaim his birth name, his grandson, who became an international phenomenon, would have been Anthony Murphy. Somehow, it just doesn’t have the same ring, does it?


Democrats Plunge Virginia Backward

November 4, 2021

By Karen

Just like their dithering role models in Congress, Virginia Democrats failed to vote in this week’s statewide elections by just enough (~2 points) to make us lose EVERYTHING. In one day, they turned our totally blue state to flaming red by letting Republicans become governor, lieutenant governor and attorney general, and regain a majority in the House of Delegates.

Trump is gloating because — despite losing Virginia TWICE — he’s now got the state in his greasy pocket.

Our next governor, Glenn Youngkin, whom Stephen Colbert aptly described as “the love child of Mr. Rogers and Ted Cruz,” vows to “change the direction of Virginia.”

The vacant eyes, the vapid smile of Virginia’s next Republican governor

Youngkin will come to power inheriting a multi-billion-dollar budget surplus, COVID on the wane, again, the Civil War and its iconography no longer a “thing,” and women able to get abortions without undergoing the invasive, unnecessary transvaginal ultrasounds pervy Republicans mandated when they last ran the show. This is the direction he wants to change.

Youngkin, a millionaire and former CEO of a hedge fund, has never held an elected office in his life. While pretending he had nothing to do with Trump, he blew Trump’s ignorance and divisiveness through a foghorn that echoed in every dark corner of the state where knuckle-draggers get along jes’ fine with no book larnin’.

He encouraged parents who never read the book to demand banning Toni Morrison’s Pulitzer Prize-winning Beloved — because it makes slavery look bad and it’s written by a black woman.

He’s also got parents’ panties in a bunch over critical race theory. They have no idea what it is, it’s NOT taught in Virginia, but they’re slavering to abolish it — because they innately know more than teachers.

I won’t be surprised when they make Gone with the Wind a textbook and mandate it in all high schools as the definitive word on the Civil War.

And Monument Avenue could very well get all its statues of loser Civil War generals back. The pedestals are still there, just waiting.

For Virginia now to “change direction,” Youngkin means to turn it into East Coast Texas. He must be itching to ban as many abortions as possible, allow even more extreme gerrymandering, and procedurally disenfranchise Democratic (ahem, minority) voters under the guise of “election integrity.”

(NOTE: Even though the top three Republican ass clowns won by just a point or two, no Democrats are screaming this election was stolen. We’re not that abysmally stupid.)

And let’s not forget the death penalty, which Virginia abolished earlier this year. Youngkin must certainly want to revive that while he’s rolling back all gun control so Virginia can proudly resume giving every homicidal nut job on the Eastern Seaboard a hassle-free experience expanding their arsenals with unlimited numbers of guns and assault weapons.

Once murders pick up again, Youngkin will want to keep Virginia’s prisons from overcrowding by having the option of speedy executions. Of course, he’ll consider pardoning any felon who declares their victim “needed killing” (i.e., the shooter is white, the victim wasn’t).

That’s justice, Republican-style.

Ever heard our famous slogan, “Virginia is for lovers”? Forget that if you’re LGBTQ. Our leaders don’t want your kind around here. And don’t expect any legal accommodations that might spare you from being personally persecuted and discriminated against in housing, jobs and services.

It’s only a matter of time before Youngkin makes his obligatory trek to Mar-a-Lago to kiss the ring of his lord and master, whose repeated endorsements (which Youngkin pretended to ignore) undoubtedly delivered the voters that no candidate appealing to reason or decency could ever hope to reach.

And now Virginia’s going to pay. Thanks a lot, Democrats. You blew it bigly.


Richmond Bids Adieu to General Robert E. Lee

September 9, 2021

By Karen

It’s a rare morning when you can wake up to GOOD news, but September 8, 2021, was one of those days.

After a legal battle that began last year during the Black Lives Matter protests in response to George Floyd’s murder, on September 2 the Virginia Supreme Court ruled that the state-owned statue of Robert E. Lee could be taken off of Monument Avenue.

Majestic, moneyed Monument Avenue has been a shrine to the Civil War for over 100 years, featuring statues of several other Confederate “heroes”: namely, Stonewall Jackson, Matthew Fontaine Maury (Google him, I have no idea), and Jefferson Davis, who was the Confederacy’s Donald Trump. These three have already been removed.

Now, with Lee’s departure, the last man/statue standing on Monument Avenue is, fittingly enough, black tennis superstar Arthur Ashe.

Fun Facts about the Lee statue:

  • It was the largest Confederate monument in the U.S.
  • The pedestal, now covered with graffiti, is 40 feet tall.
  • The bronze statue of Lee and his horse was 21 feet tall.
  • The statue weighs 12 tons.
  • The horse isn’t Lee’s faithful steed Traveler, but some rando whose name I didn’t catch.
  • When it was erected in 1890, they hoisted it onto the pedestal in seven or nine pieces (I saw conflicting numbers) and welded them together.
  • The pedestal contains a time capsule that’s said to include a rare photo of Abraham Lincoln in his coffin. We shall soon find out, because that capsule is being removed and replaced with a 2021 capsule that the governor’s wife helped assemble. [UPDATE 5 MINUTES LATER: I just read that they didn’t find the capsule today where they thought it was and plan to keep looking.]

It seemed thousands of people turned out, including Richmond Mayor Levar Stoney and Governor Ralph Northam. Local TV stations had live coverage. The area around the statue and streets were blocked off. The crowd cheered and sang as Lee sailed majestically through the air…

Photo: John McDonnell, Washington Post

I didn’t see any hordes of Confederate sympathizers protesting. Maybe they were all too busy preparing to storm the Capitol in D.C. again on September 18.

Here it is on the ground…

General Lee’s face was apparently sculpted from a cast of his real face, so the likeness is genuine. He shows a Melania-like disregard for this final humiliation. All he’s missing is her squint…

I’m including this photo I took off the TV because it’s pretty funny. The equipment near his face looks like he’s smoking a cigarette in front of his own pedestal to face a fire squad…

Before transporting the statue to an unknown location for storage, workers carefully dissected Lee at mid-torso…

Trump said they cut the statue into three pieces, but I haven’t seen that. I just hope they didn’t hurt the horse. Here’s what else the orange clown spouted, just for the attention. The sentiments do reflect his idiocy, but he clearly didn’t write this because it’s coherent…

“Our culture is being destroyed and our history and heritage, both good and bad, are being extinguished by the Radical Left and we can’t let that happen! If only we had Robert E. Lee to command our troops in Afghanistan, that disaster would have ended in a complete and total victory many years ago.”

Trump’s handlers obviously don’t realize that Lee ended the Civil War in “complete and total surrender” at Appomattox.

This was the front page of our local paper today. The Times-Dispatch must feel frantic as Civil War “developments” they’ve relied on for decades as a daily staple of their reporting dry up…

Accompanying Trump’s mental diarrhea was a page of public comments, mostly pro, some con. Some Southerners are still butt-hurt that owning human beings for profit is no longer a “thing.” It will probably take another generation or two for them to die off. The fewer reminders they have of the “good old days,” the better.

Some years ago, I was driving through the rolling Virginia mountains toward Charlottesville (probably going to visit Thomas Jefferson’s beautiful home, Monticello). It made me sad to think that after spending most of my life here, I still couldn’t consider myself a Virginian because Virginia refused to let go of the Civil War.

A writer in today’s paper, Robert Allen, arrived here in 1977, five years after me. His impression of Richmond matched mine…

“…a Lost Cause theme park; statues, streets, schools, bridges, buildings — the glory of the Confederacy was the only story Richmond was telling.”

Thank God, times are FINALLY changing here. A few years ago, nobody would have dreamed Richmond would sacrifice Monument Avenue’s perverted grandeur to get with the century.

There’s still one relatively modest Confederate statue in another part of town, of General A.P. Hill (I know, I have no idea either). It stands in a well-traveled intersection, and the general himself is buried under it — get this — standing up…

Those crazy Confederates, what will they think of next?


Jan. 6 Rioters Peeling Away from Trump

June 4, 2021

By Karen

But first, a trailer for the Anthony Bourdain HBO documentary, Roadrunner, debuting at the Tribeca Film Festival June 11, in theaters July 16…

At 1:59, see a nanosecond of Tony in a red sports car with a brunette whose identity I can only suspect. The more her existence gets erased, the more heinously criminal I believe her involvement in his final days. Call me the suspicious type.

Now, to the present…

The FBI has rounded up roughly 500 Capitol rioters. Those with clean records are getting slapped wrists. But the violent ones caught on camera face felonies and promise to be great entertainment at their trials.

FYI, here’s a Justice Department list of everyone arrested and charged. Another list at Insider.com includes personal details on the perps.

The minute TV cameras stopped rolling, Trump forgot these people exist. Without presidential pardons, desperate defense lawyers are floating, “My client is too stupid to live.”

If we didn’t have such a woke culture, they’d be calling their clients the “R” word.

Defense places all blame on Trump, his enablers and Fox “News” for dishing out a diet of lies to ignorant dupes, and claims they bear as much responsibility as the rioters.

Essentially, defense hopes to thread a needle with an elephant. They can’t go all-out and declare their clients mentally incompetent, because that lets Trump and Fox slither off the hook. Instead, the rioters were relentlessly attacked by incendiary rhetoric and finally succumbed on January 6.

Prosecutors are going to love destroying this argument.

As convicted rioters begin marching off to prison, MAGA cultists who stayed home 1/6 but still believe the Big Lie are left no choice but to wonder where their own willingness to continue eating Trump-Fox garbage may lead.

Rioter Anthony Antonio (the guy who screamed nonsensically about it being 1776), has said: “I kind of sound like an idiot now saying it, but my faith was in him [Trump].”

Antonio’s lawyer Joseph Hurley explained, “You can catch this disease.” Misinformation “is not a defense. It’s not. But it will be brought up to say: This is why he was there. Because he was a dumbass and believed what he heard on Fox News.”

I would add, and because he probably flunked history.

Footnote: Antonio has never voted in a presidential election, so he had no skin in the game.

With a pandemic fresh in their minds, MAGA cultists who hear these dipshits called, by their own lawyers, dumbasses who caught “Big Lie Disease” may realize they’re also infected.

Who needs COVID or masks when you can ingest toxic lies from your TV until your brain mush no longer comprehends that a guy who gets the fewest votes is the LOSER?

The lawyer for “QAnon shaman” Jacob Chansley claims repeated exposure to lies overwhelmed Chansley’s ability to discern reality (and fashion, obviously)…

Photo: Saul Loeb - AFP - GettyImages

Although I despise them, I don’t think all cultists are 100% evil — they’re ignorant. They’ll get the shock of their lives when the trials reveal exactly how Trump and Fox have twisted their sad little minds.

Defections are happening already. On Memorial Day in Florida, Trump falsely claimed “thousands” of boaters waved Trump flags on parade. WTSP in Tampa Bay reported

Just north of the former president’s residence at Mar-a-Lago, “Trump 2024” flags waved in the wind as dozens of boats took to the water.

Two days later, Trump pulled the plug on his 29-day-old From the Desk of blog to “put it out of its misery” (his words) because few were reading.

Trump’s ability to spread poison is waning. His mental faculties are more often discussed than his positions on anything, especially since his delusion that he’ll regain power in August. He’s making no major personal appearances with press allowed. The great showman who lives to feed off crowds like an energy vampire will be babbling remotely via Jumbotron at a Wisconsin rally on June 12.

Rioters’ trials condemning the “Foxitis” contagion and Trump’s growing inability to hide his dementia should thin the cult. Treasonous Republicans still courting Trump’s dwindling base may find themselves like Wile E. Coyote come reelection…

BONUS: Searching YouTube, I came upon this golden oldie cat video that still makes me laugh. In the original version, these cats were meowing at each other. Then someone gave them dialogue…


Wish Prince Harry Would Stuff a Sock In It

May 25, 2021

By Karen

His mouth, I mean. I’ve been fuming over Republicans trying to block a January 6 commission because they’re scared shitless of exposing their role as insurrection mentors and enablers. But the other nasty story that keeps pinging my radar is Harry and his terrible, horrible, beastly, nightmarish, very bad childhood.

The bulk of this tale has come out since Harry went to his grandfather Prince Philip’s funeral. There, he had to face William and Charles after letting his wife Meghan call the Royal Family a pack of racists, to Oprah’s everlasting faux-shock, on national TV.

Harry’s lucky Aunt Princess Anne and Uncle Prince Edward just cut him dead, when they probably would have liked to drag him out behind the castle and beat the snot out of him.

On a side note, Harry just showed an equal lack of respect for his adopted country during his Armchair Expert podcast when he called our First Amendment “bonkers” (44:54). Now Fox and Trump’s cult are pissed at him, too.

He followed that up by taking more whacks at the Windsors on an Apple TV+ series he’s producing with Oprah called The Me You Can’t See. As her subject for one episode, he nailed Charles as a terrible father who believed his sons should grow up as miserable as he’d been as a child.

By the way, the Queen is Charles’ mother. She’s still alive, 95, and freshly widowed. But Harry didn’t think twice about outing her by inference as a negligent parent.

But I’m most intrigued by what he unwittingly reveals about Meghan. He compares Meghan to Diana’s Egyptian boyfriend, Dodi Fayed, taking it no deeper than race. I suspect their motivations in hooking up with a royal is the more apt parallel to draw.

For example, after less than a year in the “Firm,” pregnant (manipulative value), Meghan chose right before she and Harry had to appear in public at a glittery concert to tell him she was considering suicide and how she’d do it. Then she apparently cried quietly during the concert, lest his memory fade.

The upshot was that Harry gave up his life and bought Meghan a mansion among the rich and famous in Montecito, where she’d be comfortable.

Then he described being awakened one night by Meghan right before the big Oprah CBS interview. He thought she was crying softly into her pillow so as not to wake him. This time, although separated by a continent and an ocean, Meghan was distraught over the royals’ and media’s “smear campaign” against her.

I wouldn’t put it past Meghan to have waited until Harry fell asleep to play this scene for maximum impact. She was bent on using Oprah to exact revenge on her in-laws and had to ensure that Harry wouldn’t back out because his grandfather happened to be lying on his deathbed.

Now Harry says he’s going around “telling his story” to help others. Our hearts all go out to 12-year-old Harry over the tragic, senseless loss of his mother. But no matter how Harry spins it, we saw him grow up with palaces, privilege and a devoted older brother, and party his way through life until he joined the army. Now he’s revealing that he has no sense of history, and no respect for his grandmother, who has dutifully lived the role history thrust upon her.

Harry wants the wealth without the responsibilities. The fame without the exposure. Total privacy while baring all in every media outlet that will have him.

Harry keeps lobbing these “truth” grenades at his family like a passive-aggressive chickenshit, knowing they can’t wallow in the muck trying to defend themselves.

I hope Harry and Oprah are over-milking this mental health cow and soon have people saying, “Enough already. We get it. You had horrible childhoods. But you’re rich and famous now. Stop acting like a pair of greedy ingrates and go away.”


Impeachment Conviction is Too Gentle for Trump

February 11, 2021

By Karen

I have but one regret about this second impeachment of Donald Trump for incitement of insurrection: That, if he’s convicted, it doesn’t come with a bonus sentence of eternity in prison and a daily torture session.

Consigning Trump to history as the only twice-impeached president is meaningless because he doesn’t do humiliation, and he’ll be dead anyway. Disqualifying him from running from office again is moot because he has no intention of doing it. He just wants to grift campaign donations.

I want to see Trump pay in actual physical suffering, which is a consequence he’s never faced before. I want to see him broken and whimpering, as he fondly says, “like a dog.”

The House impeachment managers have been doing a masterful job of weaving myriad pieces of January 6 together to give us a heretofore unseen and unheard montage of the hours of vicious horror Trump’s screaming scum inflicted on the Capitol.

I imagine many Trumpers who were there that day are watching raptly to see if they get any screen time. And I wonder if — unlike their enablers Cruz and Hawley in the Senate — they feel the teeniest bit of shame. They ALL let themselves be conned, and possibly killed, just to help Trump realize his fondest fantasy of seeing Americans sacrifice their lives to his glory.

Maybe the rioters will get it when they hear the FBI knocking on their doors.

Lindsey Graham has deemed the videos “offensive” and “absurd.” He actually thinks his colleagues seeing hard evidence of how close they all came to being torn apart by the mob will inspire more “not guilty” votes for Trump.

It makes you wonder what crackerjack defense Lindsey thinks Trump’s team will pull out of their asses tomorrow when they show up for Act Two of Tuesday’s babbling freak show that defended nothing.

Obviously, Graham was lying his prissy little pants off when he took this oath before the trial began…

“I solemnly swear (or affirm, as the case may be,) that in all things appertaining to the trial of the impeachment of Donald J. Trump, now pending, I will do impartial justice according to the Constitution and laws: so help me God.”

If their votes two days ago against the constitutionality of the trial is any indication, 44 Republican senators may still be determined to march in lockstep with Trump all the way to hell, with Lady Lindsey as lead drum majorette.

I don’t know how anyone watching this trial, especially those who were in the Capitol on January 6, can conclude that Trump isn’t steeped in insurrection and blood. Any senators who vote “Not Guilty” (Translation: the riot was no big deal and Trump is blameless because his incitement is protected speech) deserve to be cast out of Congress immediately for spitting on every oath they have ever taken to uphold the Constitution.


In Two More Days, the Nightmare Ends

January 18, 2021

By Karen

I have a feeling I’ll be on a crying jag Wednesday (January 20) — with joy and relief — watching Joe Biden and Kamala Harris sworn in as president and vice president of the United States.

At that moment, it becomes open season on Donald Trump, Mike Pence and anyone who enabled their racist, corrupt reign of terror.

Time to stick a pin in it. He’s finished.

Trump isn’t leaving Washington until the morning of Biden’s big day. Because…

  • Trump wants to seize at least some of the day’s headlines; it’s always all about him.
  • Trump’s incapable of behaving like an adult.
  • Trump thinks he’s entitled to a hero’s send-off, one week after his record-breaking second impeachment.

That’s right. Trump expects a color guard, a military band, a red carpet and a 21-gun salute.

I think a lot of taxpayers would be OK with the 21-gun salute — if Trump wore a blindfold and the bullets weren’t being shot into the air.

Like the pair of surly little bitches they are, Donald and Melania will not extend the same civility and kindness the Obamas showed them on Inauguration Day. They will NOT welcome the Bidens into the White House, nor accompany them to the inauguration.

No one will be surprised if Trump spends his final morning defacing the White House like his cult did the Capitol. Instead of leaving the customary note outgoing presidents leave for their successor, Biden may find a pile of Trump’s shit in the Resolute Desk.

Trump wouldn’t be above leaving water marks from wet Diet Coke cans all over the famous desk, a gift from Queen Victoria, or even gouging his name into it, just to remind Biden he’d been there.

Trump’s thinking is so spitefully immature, there’s no telling how he’ll act out. But he will do something demented and disgusting, mark my words.

As more horrific video comes out of the crazed mob Trump urged to attack the Capitol, many of the rioters are going on public record declaring they absolutely did it on Trump’s orders.

They stupidly think relaying this to Trump via the media (since they can’t tweet or Facebook him) is going to earn them nice pardons. They never learn.

Actually, they’re driving big nails into Trump’s coffin. “He made me do it” excuses will be used to validate his incitement to insurrection. This boosts his chances the Senate will vote convict him this time AND prohibit him from ever holding public office again.

And as of 12:01 on Wednesday, criminal charges could follow.

To see Trump ultimately crushed under the filthy, stinking boots of the ignorant MAGA mob HE created would be fitting as his political career ends and financial ruin, convictions and likely prison sentences begin.

In the end, it won’t matter. Biden will be president and able to rout out the corrupt saboteurs Trump planted in the government. Biden will mend fences with our allies and get us back into the globally vital treaties Trump couldn’t begin to comprehend, much less honor.

Fueled by national outrage and a need to see some justice at last, the FBI will continue arresting and charging Trump’s MAGA cultists.

Some of them already realize Trump threw them under the bus in his final little speech, abhorring the violence and acknowledging a new administration. Those desperate to cling to the last shred of crazy interpreted Trump as saying the new administration would be HIS come January 20, only with new faces because he’s cleaning house yet again.

Sure, whatever, you morons. On Wednesday, Trump is out. And like the Confederacy he so dearly loves, Trump will never rise again.

Hallelujah!

THIS JUST IN: The Trump Baby Blimp has just been acquired by the Museum of London.


Why Trump is Still in the White House

January 11, 2021

By Karen

I can explain why in two words: Mike Pence.

Last Wednesday, January 6, 2021, will be remembered along with Pearl Harbor Day and 9/11 not because it caused a staggering death toll, but because the United States came face to face with a terrifying monster inside the house.

Literally.

A crazed, predominantly white, mob, whipped into a seditious frenzy AT THE WHITE HOUSE by Donald Trump, erected a gallows outside the U.S. Capitol…

Photo: thesun.co.uk

Then they stormed the building screaming “Hang Mike Pence!” among other things. Some came with zip ties for binding hands and feet. Whose? Their hostages? Prisoners they’d condemn on the spot to hang? They wandered through the Senate Chamber where Pence would have been, had there been no time to hide him…

Photo: Win McNamee/Getty

The clown above in the helmet holding zip ties is retired Air Force Lieutenant Colonel Larry Rendall Brock from Texas. He was identified from photos by his ex-wife, arrested and charged.

Brock claimed to journalist Ronan Farrow that he found the zip ties on the floor and meant to give them to police, but shoved them in his pocket and “forgot.”

The FBI, aided by armchair detectives on social media, seems to be doing a fair job with IDs and arrests. For instance, they’ve nabbed Jake Angeli of Arizona, the shirtless guy in the furry horned headdress…

Photo: Saul Loeb/AFP – Getty

And Richard Barnett of Arkansas, the one with his feet up on a desk in Nancy Pelosi’s office…

Photo: Saul Loeb/AFP – Getty

Every day seems to produce more horrifying video of the violence, including the point-blank shooting by Capitol police of a female rioter trying to break through a door, and of rioters dragging, swarming and beating with flagpoles an officer on the steps outside.

Yet Pence and his dwindling band of gutless treason-weasels in Trump’s Cabinet (including Ben Carson, Wilbur Ross, Mike Pompeo, Steve Mnuchin, Mark Meadows et al.) STILL won’t invoke the 25th Amendment.

Pence’s has said he might consider the 25th if Trump becomes “more unstable.”

What the hell might that look like? Trump running naked through the Rose Garden, pounding the button to launch the nukes?

Nancy Pelosi is moving ahead today with one article of impeachment, “Incitement to insurrection.”

This came after a resolution from the House that tried to compel Pence to invoke the 25th got shot down in the Senate. After having all THEIR lives endangered by Trump last week, Mitch McConnell and his gang of traitors are still protecting him.

Or perhaps it’s because the resolution cited the Constitution’s 14th Amendment, which “prohibits any person who has ‘engaged in insurrection or rebellion against’ the United States” from holding office.

If they threw Trump out on that, Senators Josh Hawley, Ted Cruz and the others who supported the insurrection by continuing afterwards to vote against Biden’s certification would have to go next.

Trump only has nine days left. Thankfully, his ability to create chaos has FINALLY been crippled by being cut off from all his favorite social media platforms (Facebook, Twitter).

Amazon checkmated him by refusing to continue hosting Parler. Parler has evolved into an extreme right-wing forum where Trump’s cult planned a lot of the insurrection. After losing Twitter, Trump presumably intended to anoint himself king of Parler, but it’s got only a tiny fraction of the reach he had.

And since Google and Apple have removed the Parler app from their stores, new users can’t download it, so it seems doomed to remain fringey.

In a nutshell, I see these as the compelling reasons to boot Trump out NOW:

  1. To keep him from pardoning himself, his family, his criminal cronies and ALL the Capitol rioters.
  2. To prohibit Trump from running for or holding elected office. In addition to making the world safer, he’d have no reason to ever hold another stupid rally. AND it would end his stealing from his gullible cult because he could have no campaign fund.
  3. To make him a private citizen so state and federal prosecutors can proceed with all the indictments and lawsuits they’ve been working on.
  4. To begin fumigating the White House.

The country does need to move on. But it can’t heal until Donald Trump has no power, no money and no effective means of communication to spread his poison to anyone stupid enough to listen to him.


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