Bill Maher Takes Posthumous Pot-Shot at Bourdain

By Karen

For his liberal, albeit cynical, voice, I generally appreciate Bill Maher. But when it came to Anthony Bourdain, I’ve thought he behaved like a weasely little dick. It’s probably height envy.

The only time I ever saw Bourdain on Real Time with Bill Maher was August 5, 2011, when he joined in mid-debate the panel, which included Neil deGrasse Tyson and Steve Bannon. Tony came onstage carrying a paperback book that was probably Medium Raw, apparently thinking he was there to discuss it. But it was never mentioned.

This clip shows a just a slice of the welcome he got from Maher and their somewhat wary body language…

Here’s Tony’s contribution to the general discussion, when he could get a word in…

Now, fast-forward to last night. It marked exactly three weeks since Tony died by suicide. It was also the last live episode of Real Time before a month-long hiatus. Bill Maher offered a series of “future headlines” to tide viewers over until he returns on August 3.

Among them was this headline about Bourdain…

Here’s video of the whole series of headlines so you can judge for yourself how the audience reacted to Tony’s…

They seemed to me to laugh and applaud as had been the pattern, but then they caught themselves. Maher quickly recovered by launching right back into another dig at Sandra Huckabee Sanders and regained their full enthusiasm.

I’m still scratching my head trying to make any sense of the Bourdain joke. Pairing the destruction of Asia with Tony’s death seemed like a random dig to get in a gratuitous last word. It was a punch below the belt by Bill Maher, IMO.

PS: OMG, OMG, how did I miss the OBVIOUS??!! I just got the “joke.” Comet destroys ASIA!!

UPDATE LATER JUNE 30 : Bourdain had the last word. Lenora contributed this quote to the comments on this post from an interview Tony did on December 29, 2016…

Bisley: A few years back you were on Real Time with Bill Maher and part of the discussion was about people living inside their own bubbles. What do you think of Bill Maher?

Bourdain: Insufferably smug. Really the worst of the smug, self-congratulatory left. I have a low opinion of him. I did not have an enjoyable experience on his show. Not a show I plan to do again. He’s a classic example of the smirking, contemptuous, privileged guy who lives in a bubble. And he is in no way looking to reach outside, or even look outside, of that bubble, in an empathetic way.

That’s our Tony.

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204 Responses to Bill Maher Takes Posthumous Pot-Shot at Bourdain

  1. Francis Alan Wormald says:

    A VERY INTERESTING & SURPRISING POST..IT WAS “REAL”…MAHER WELL KNOWN FOR LAUGHING AT HIS OWN “OBSERVATIONS”..THE LATEST BOURDAIN “SHOT” WAS OBTUSE& POSSIBLY CRUEL…BE GLAD HE’S GONE AT LEAST A MONTH!!! 😕 {NEIL TYSON ALWAYS MAKES SENSE….}

  2. Mira says:

    Dancing on his grave…I don’t know who his audience is. I generally find the late talk show format of the forced laughter after quick 2 second soundbites not funny, and cringe-worthy.
    I did a super quick search and there was no love lost between these two guys. Bourdain described Maher as ‘insufferably smug’ etc. and vowed never to return to his show. Maher’s post-humous dig at him – beyond the pale.

  3. Anita says:

    I used to watch Bill Maher religiously but something a few months ago struck me as being a little cruel. I haven’t watched much since then. The AB mention is also a little cruel. Was his point that there are far more important things to be upset about than AB’s death?

    Bill is also very anti-fat people so I doubt he is a foodie. All of us foodies loved AB because we could live and eat vicariously through him. The Parts Unknown with Paul Bocuse where AB ate many of the chef’s most legendary dishes was one of my favorite shows. Definite food porn!

  4. feijicha says:

    Bill Maher is turning into the old guy who yells “get off my lawn”. In the last few years the pace of current society passed him by and he never fully caught up. I saw this last night and it pissed me off. It is jealousy,

  5. Lenora says:

    Posted below is AB’s opinion of Maher. The interview was in Reason 12/29/2016

    Bisley: A few years back you were on Real Time with Bill Maher and part of the discussion was about people living inside their own bubbles. What do you think of Bill Maher?

    Bourdain: Insufferably smug. Really the worst of the smug, self-congratulatory left. I have a low opinion of him. I did not have an enjoyable experience on his show. Not a show I plan to do again. He’s a classic example of the smirking, contemptuous, privileged guy who lives in a bubble. And he is in no way looking to reach outside, or even look outside, of that bubble, in an empathetic way.

  6. catsworking says:

    Lenora, thanks for that quote. Perfect! I wish I could have found more of their banter on video. It was obvious that Maher felt threatened or jealous or something.

    That I totally didn’t get the joke reinforced to me how little thought I give the skank when I’m not on the blog. When I see the word “Asia,” I always think of the continent first, even now. The more I think of it, the less sense the double entendre makes. Can someone explain it?

    And maybe someone can make sense to me why Maher said “white people” are still talking about Bourdain on FB.

    I’m beginning to think one of his writers who vaguely knew something about Bourdain came up with that one, and Maher used it just to be mean and topical but didn’t know what he was saying because the whole Asia thing has been so downplayed in the media. Maher was certainly no fan on Tony’s.

  7. izzy1957 says:

    Really, this is just too much to keep seeing from her, because as we know it looks like we wont get it from her anytime soon.

  8. Lynn says:

    Not surprised given they did not get along. I watch Maher every Friday because I agree with most of what he says (emphasis most). I like that he’s one of just a few nonbelievers willing to mock religion without fear of the PC fascists getting in his face, and of course his take on Trump. I would agree with AB that Maher is extremely smug and arrogant, and thinks he knows more than everyone else on every topic and is not open at all to other points of view.

    However, it’s a bit of a stretch to say Bill is in a bubble given how many dates he spends on the road in ‘flyover’ country. No, Trump voters are not going to Bill’s stand up shows, but he is at least in their midst as he does not limit his shows to blue states. I also don’t think Maher is just ‘preaching to the converted’ given that he frequently criticizes the left. If you look at far left bloggers and media types, for instance, they hate Maher. They label him racist, sexist, xenophobic, etc.

    I get what AB was saying but I’m a little sick of this break bread with Trump voters and stop looking down on them BS. My own mother voted for Trump and I’ve told her to her face I lost respect for her when she did. If these folks don’t want to be looked down on, perhaps they should stop doing things that are so easily looked down upon (exhibit A. the Cajun episode). It’s hard to have respect for people who are so easily conned and allow a reality show buffoon to play on their fears.

    I was always disgusted by AB’s “friendship” with Ted “I like to cause animals to suffer for fun” Nugent. A man who has made blatantly racist comments, was investigated for threatening the president, didn’t shower and crapped his pants for over a week to avoid service in Vietnam, and became legal guardian to an underage girl that he was sleeping with back in the day.

    Tony could get inconsistent – on the one hand saying we should be open to those we disagree with but on the other outright dismissing some people that HE disagreed with (vegetarians, people who show any courtesy to Henry Kissinger, Woody Harrelson, etc).

    Anita – Maher is definitely not a foodie. Check this out. https://www.esquire.com/news-politics/a55479/bill-maher-profile/

    He has borderline OCD / obsessive food habits and thinks he’s an expert there, too. Like he will only eat unpasteurized dairy and his breakfast is mostly seeds. I eat super healthy and am in no way a foodie, and I even I find his regimen ridic. He also won’t use microwaves.

  9. jwg22 says:

    I don’t understand if he meant Asia the continent or Asia the woman? Or is that part of the joke? But c’mon… white people are far from the only people talking about Bourdain still. It was crude, and I hope Bill didn’t write it himself. Bill’s ideology may be in agreement with mine a lot of the time, but I’m fully aware that he is a dick. Thanks for this round-up, what a very surreal gathering of characters that was back in 2011.

  10. Mira says:

    RE B.Maher – sounds like a proper douche bag. Provocation for the sake of provocation.

    And re AA’s new ‘post’ – she has been gaslighting him, and now she continues to gaslight us. The usual advice to targets of this behaviour is to cut them out of your life. Completely.

  11. Anita says:

    Karen, thanks for the article link. That was very enlightening. No, Bill is not a foodie. Ground seeds for lunch? I don’t think so. Maybe it’s one reason he has short term relationships. Most women unless they are anorexic sometimes want a nice meal!

  12. Lenora says:

    Its obvious Maher and Bourdain didn’t care for each other. Maher came off in that clip as trying to get a dig at Tony when Tony can’t give it to him back. What an ass. And to add further insult, the joke isn’t even funny.

  13. Donna Pavone says:

    Definitely some…..envy…..with this one. My unnamed friends who were bartenders and strippers in the unnamed strip club where he used to hang out HATED him. Apparently he has some skin condition that causes him to shed like a pile of snakes. Someone tell Bill Maher not to be a dick in strip clubs because strippers tell everyone

  14. Morganlf says:

    Karen you wrote about Tony’s appearance in August 2011, titled “Checking in On Bourdain”.

    Donna/Zappa you and I were there in comments in full force:

    MorganLF says:
    August 8, 2011 at 3:19 pm
    Bill Maher was marking his territory, Jersey style. Here is how it played out: Tony came out all smiles and Maher who is one of the most well-read up-to-date informed and scathingly funny analysts on television, was loaded for bear. Tony twice made the comment that they were both Jersey boys the same age but Bill seemed to brush over that. He mentioned that his staff was all excited that Tony was a guest. You can best believe Maher, who fancies himself as quite the “swordsman” is surrounded by a bunch of attractive ladies. It must have piqued him that Bourdain had them all worked up.

    Bill is smart and witty, but a meeskite of the highest order. Thanking “Arthur” Bourdain was a deliberate slight. He introduced Tony as a “chef and bad boy” for a guy so informed, categorizing Bourdain as he did was a big “tell”.

    Maher admitted to learning a lot about world politics by watching Tony intermingling with local cultures on No Res and also admitted he’s read “Medium Raw” when he asked Tony about patronized whores (he should know- Maher has been linked with some of Hollywood’s most notorious). Did he not read the rest of the book? Why not introduce Bourdain as writer, travel-host, and lecturer?

    Anyway, I thought Tony was disarmingly nice and quite respectful of Maher’s position as host and made no attempt at grandstanding. Maher was threatened and a bit dismissive and it showed. He has a staff of writers and his shit is fucking hilarious, but come on whose shoes would you rather have under your bed?

    https://catsworking.wordpress.com/2011/08/08/checking-in-on-bourdain/#comment-9647

  15. Morganlf says:

    Karen,

    if you think things got rough here a few days ago scroll through those moments from the above post in 2011 Look for Valerian..and our responses…lololol

    That’s how we roll…remember?

  16. catsworking says:

    Thanks, izzy. I felt compelled to post my first direct reply to her. She is an unredeemable POS.

  17. catsworking says:

    Lynn, I lost one friend last year when I learned he still supported Trump and got most of his “news” from Fox, and I’ve got a couple on hold where the subject has not come up, but I know I will cut them loose when it does.

    As far as I’m concerned, those who voted for Trump were woefully ill-informed and maybe brainwashed, but those who support him now are traitors, and that includes many members of Congress. After this travesty of putting children in Trump Child Prison Camps, I would shed no tears if they were all taken out and shot. The world would be better off without their ignorant hatefulness.

    OMG, as I was typing this, my TV was hijacked into taping a Parts Unknown episode on L.A. I’m listening to Tony right now…

  18. catsworking says:

    jwg22, thank you. I’m not the only one who found that joke nonsensical. On first hearing, I took it to mean the continent, and he was saying a continent was destroyed, yet “white people” were still discussing Bourdain.

    But then I thought, the girlfriend. Then it made absolutely no sense.

    And like you, I agree with Maher most of the time, but he is a smug dick.

  19. catsworking says:

    Donna, this is my laugh of the day. Psoriasis perhaps?

  20. catsworking says:

    Morgan, thank you for the research. I thought I probably wrote about it at the time, but didn’t have time this morning to dig.

    Anyone looking for early Bourdain can find it here in the archives and the comments when we were on the case.

    Your comments provide the video I couldn’t find.

  21. catsworking says:

    Morgan, thanks for the memory. I had completely forgotten about Valerian and the witty repartee that followed — without the troll. Those were surely the days…

    Well-considered snark is always welcome at Cats Working. Bourdain would want nothing less.

  22. Morganlf says:

    😉 Wink..we have always been a “tart”crew. I think Tony appreciated that. Which is why he’s reached out to YOU.

    By FEDX no less….

  23. catsworking says:

    Oh, Morgan, you may make me shed the tears I’ve been holding in for three weeks. CNN is airing old shows and my DVR is filling up. I’m on vacay this week and I think it’s going to be a Bourdain binge. Full immersion one last time.

  24. Lynn says:

    “Apparently he has some skin condition that causes him to shed like a pile of snakes. ”

    Ewwwww. I’ve always wondered about Maher. I don’t think he likes women very much. Why are his relationships always short term and why does he only date strippers, hos, porn stars etc.? Has he ever been with a classy woman who was his equal in any sense of the word? Or is he threatened by any woman that he can’t look down on? He seems super rigid and closed off, afraid to let any woman get too close. Actually he and AA would make a great pair. Maher once said (paraphrasing): “When you’re in a relationship, the other person’s problems become your problems, and I’ve always found that too burdensome.”

    He doesn’t seem at all capable of the empathy, heart and kindness that Tony showed. I can’t imagine Maher ever acting humble or self deprecating, and he prob wouldn’t be as patient with pushy fans wanting selfies, either. That said, he probably wouldn’t have fallen victim to A’s ‘my crotch is busier than Grand Central,’ either.

  25. Adele Prass says:

    Thanks for the memories, Morgan. All these years later, I still remember your explanation of the fine art of the Jersey put down.

    As for Maher, he can be clever, and I generally enjoy New Rules, but his vehement anti-Muslim stand; his anti-vaccine rants, and his feeling that he had the right to use the “n” word really get on my last nerve..

    I think the “white people” reference in the Bourdain slam meant snowflakes, who don’t care about anything else that’s happening in the world. Years ago, when Chicago rehabbed Navy Pier, they had an entertainment venue, where Maher appeared. A friend was the managing director of the venue, and she said that Maher was so rude and demanding that his girlfriend (at that time) ended up apologizing for him. My friend said he wasn’t that nice to the girlfriend, either.

  26. izzy1957 says:

    Absolutely, Karen. I replied directly too – for the second time. Apparently, this time I hit a nerve. AA blocked me on Twitter.

    I can only say as much as she might have her small fan base, she and her supporters are none too pleased with social media’s responses. You’d think she’d understand she should just go away and STFU, but she keeps stirring the pot.

    On AA’s Instagram stories – there’s one with her ass plastered with a “Fuck You All” banner. Gee, what happened to Fuck Everyone, You Know Who You Are?

    I know I can sleep tonight.

  27. catsworking says:

    Lynn, once again we are of the same mind. I don’t know if Maher is secretly gay, but his contempt for women comes through like his contempt for God. He seemed threatened by a red-blooded, sure, hetero like Bourdain.

    And Maher’s brand of empathy is cruel. We’re lucky he’s on our side, because if he was on the other, he’d be advocating having all the immigrant children lined up along pits and shot so they could fall into their graves.

  28. Lynn says:

    HA, too funny I’ve often wondered if he was closeted. I don’t think he has contempt for God because you need to believe someone/something exists in order to have contempt for it. 🙂

  29. catsworking says:

    izzy, congratulations. You are officially a member of the Antiargent. (I just made that up.) I haven’t checked Twitter, so I don’t know if I’ve been blocked as well for tweeting her directly. I hope I am. Let her fester with her coven of devotees while the rest of the world roasts her at the stake. She knows what she did, and she knows what may yet be revealed.

    Having sex with a big dog or a horse in her next film isn’t going to bail her out of her current dilemma, much as she would wish it to.

  30. Morganlf says:

    Adele,

    Those memories seem like a memorial.

    I’m sure you remember the days when 11 years ago. We sleuthed,dug in, wrote, and ultimately met our guy. What nerve we had! And what a nerve we hit!

    On the way we traded life stories, opinions, and a recipe or two.

    Some of us (ok me) met Ottavia and were shamed of our earlier opinions of Tony marrying someone so young. She was, is charming.

    But we never used Karen’s platform to besmirch Anthony, like some.

    Anyway, felicitations, I’m a gonna relax with a baccardi n coke!

    Still missing him..

  31. Adele Prass says:

    Morgan,

    I’m sipping a Balvenie on the rocks, and binging on Parts Unknown on CNN. I’m in Newfoundland, now, but I just watched Oman — a place I never wanted to visit, but that Tony made so interesting, I was ashamed of my narrow view.

    It was fun. Weren’t you kicked out of the White House, when we were all in DC together — camera? Just as Tony brought the world to us, I suspect he he brought disparate groups of Americans together. I started reading Cats Working, because I liked talking to the cats and got to meet a bunch of interesting people and Anthony Bourdain instead.

    I can’r believe we’ve lost Tony’s voice. This will always hurt.

  32. Morganlf says:

    Adele,

    Pick at a scab why dontcha? Yes I made the arrangements.

    It took a bit of forms and so forth, but got on the White House Tour..during the term of Obama one of my heroes!

    Here’s the rub: the instructions said no cameras. So I didn’t bring one, but then 2012? I brought my cell to communicate with you and Karen so we could meet up.

    This was early in smart phone era. I had a quasi smart phone, shit camera that I didn’t think about.

    When we got there waited in line,I surrendered the phone and was banned. We were given a choice I could leave with the phone or my friend could.
    Since I made the arrangements I told her I’d take the tour. No way she said. So even though she is now a Trumper who dismisses the “kids in cages as fakers who never should have come here” she got to tour the WH.

    I split, got a soft pretzel and a coke and sat in Lafayette Park across the street stewing.

    Thanks a lot I’m still vexed!

    She and her husband trash Obama, Hillary endlessly, still bring up emails, wear MAGA hats ..

    Don’t ask! I live in North Jersey, very blue. But these friends of mine are evidently racist. 50 years we grew up together, and unbelievably..Trumpers. That’s how hard a black POTUS hit them..except he is half white.

    Thank god my family…is proper,
    .

  33. Mary Hunter says:

    I used to really enjoy Bill Maher, back in the day. One if my favorite sayings he had was “Married people make a pretty bad advertisement for their own product.” I thought it was funny. But looking forward, he just was not into any long term relationship. Then somewhere, and I don’t know where, I read something he said that was truly anti cats. So not funny to me. That kind of told me what I needed to know about Bill Maher, kind of like when you start dating someone and they aren’t cool to pets.

    Morgan, great post, “whose shoes would you rather have under your bed.” Perfect!

    Lynn, .loved your comment about Maher not empathetic. So true, you hit the nail on the head.

    Morgan, I believe Ottavia was so good for Tony, even though at first we might have been wary. I remember those shows with him and her in Italy and how good they were together.

    Karen, thanks always for this place to share.

    .

  34. catsworking says:

    Mary, I’ve never heard Bill Maher say anything against cats, but I can totally see him doing so. He’d find a cat’s intelligence and dignity threatening. But he’d probably also be contemptuous of dogs because they’re so blindly obedient.

    Anybody who doesn’t like animals is not to be trusted, in my book.

    Have any of you ever noticed how often random cats show up in Bourdain’s shows as B roll? Occasionally, he’ll even interact with strays that approach him. Of course, he and Ottavia had a black cat named Lupetto (he was hers) for many years.

    While we’re strolling down memory lane, here’s an interview my late cat Cole did with Lupetto back in 2011…

    https://catsworking.wordpress.com/2011/05/23/lupetto-bourdain-confidential/

  35. Mira says:

    I can’t recall if I saw this poignant painting on this blog or elsewhere,
    it’s called ‘The sky is falling. I am learning to live with this’, by John Lurie, and AB purchased it a few days before he died.
    I tried to copy it here, maybe someone else succeeds.

  36. Mira says:

    and by the way, super cute cat interview 🙂 , I feel like I stepped into a parallel universe for a brief few happy minutes.

  37. catsworking says:

    Mira, it must have been somewhere else. I’ve seen the painting but I haven’t posted it on the blog, and I don’t think people can put images in their comments. At least, I’ve never seen any.

    Jacques Pepin said he sent Tony a few weeks before he died a painting that Pepin had painted himself. It was abstract, but much more cheerful-looking that the one you reference, which was all dark blue.

  38. izzy1957 says:

    “The sky is falling, I am learning to live with it.”
    Now in the collection of Anthony Bourdain.

  39. catsworking says:

    izzy, thank you! Great image of the painting.

  40. Mira says:

    https://goo.gl/images/zoS2EE

    I hope it’s the right image. I feel his world was literally caving in.

  41. Mira says:

    Ah, you beat me to it, thanks.

  42. izzy1957 says:

    Here’s the link to the abstract painting entitled “Construction 1” that AB picked out from the list that Jacques Pépin provided to him to pick out a painting from.

    https://www.kqed.org/bayareabites/128903/jacques-pepin-shares-memories-of-anthony-bourdain

  43. catsworking says:

    Mira, you got it as well. I’m leaving both links up in case one goes bad at some point.

  44. catsworking says:

    izzy, thanks for the link to the Pepin interview. I hadn’t seen it. Great photo of the painting, and a very rare glimpse of Gloria, Pepin’s wife.

  45. Anita says:

    Karen, regarding men and cats. My husband forced me to get a cat when we were first married because I was working at home and he thought I needed a buddy. I never had a cat, but of course it really was for him. And now 20 years later I am madly in love with any and all cats. The first one died a few years ago and we are gone too much to have another, but I threaten my husband all the time that he did this to me!

    We are going to Rome next year and I am going to surprise him with a trip over to the Cat Sanctuary. They live among the ruins and are supported by non-profits there. BTW, I would never trust a man that doesn’t like cats and the fact AB did makes me love him more.

  46. Lynn says:

    I saw today that KC is #1 in nonfiction, not surprisingly.

    Re: Maher, he’s actually an animal activist but a selective one. He’s on the board of PETA, but eats meat (when he’s not obsessing over seeds lol). He has done various PSAs, the most recent I believe was against a cruel experiment on dogs. He has a few times mentioned animal mistreatment on his show and in interviews, but he may very well dislike cats. Never heard him say anything pro or con.

    I watched his most recent show and I have to say I wish he’d stop saying Trump plans to stay in office even if he loses in 2020. I thought the idea was to motivate people to vote. How exactly will saying this do so? Looking forward to Moore’s new film Fahrenheit 11/9!

    AA’s latest IG pic is her and AB both giving the finger in separate pics, with the caption “These birds are for you-hoo. You know who YOU are.” Warning don’t view these pics while eating:

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5906227/Asia-Argento-dons-denim-shorts-say-epic-loser-mourns-Anthony-Bourdain.html

    And she posted a link to this story on twitter:

    https://www.playboy.com/read/the-misogynistic-aftermath-of-celebrity-suicide?utm_source=twitter&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=native&utm_content=article

    While wanton blaming of a woman for a man’s suicide with no evidence she did anything wrong is, I agree misogyny, that is not the case when there is clear evidence that the woman treated the man like shit in the days/weeks leading up to his suicide. So, no AA, this is not the ‘Courtney Love phenomenon’. Nice try.

  47. Donna says:

    Ooooohhhh….Lynn,I love Bill Maher and Asia together! He can be her submissive little bitch! That should be her next movie! Morgan your investigative skills are genius, perhaps Mueller needs an assistant?

  48. bamboo.skewer says:

    Cynical, skeptical people can get beyond curmudgeonly as they age, and all the cynicism piles up into a Mount Everest of their lives – they get so disrespectful, distasteful and even cruel. That is Bill Maher’s path.

    Asia’s IG stories today are BEYOND. They also show she has strategy. She’s building toward something. All the angry faces and words, the victim words, it’s a consistent strategy in her roll-out. She has now merged social media stories with public media. She deftly puts the most gross images on stories that fade away (keep screen shotting that shit!), they are not in her permanent Instagram feed. I wish Playboy to be the last from her, hope it’s not the first.

    Playboy is complicit in lying by omission for her!!! We are not upset by only one photo of her holding hands with a guy that she shared in her Instagram feed. Is this why she deleted that photo? To cast the attention to that deleted photo? WHY in the hell is there no mention, Playboy, of all the photos with Hugo taken by two different photographers, doing a lot more than holding hands, only days before the suicide? Surely Playboy is aware of them? Have they done their own research? Or is Asia’s PR team their sole source? If they know of those photos (surely they do?) then why ignore them? Why do AA’s bidding?

    C’mon.

    Here’s what’s going on, it’s plain as day now. Asia is stealing energy from all of us. This is abuse to a mass audience. It’s lying and gaslighting and projection to a mass audience. I don’t wish to have energy and time of my life drained by her any more. I don’t wish for her to stretch her narcissist tentacles across an ocean and ensnare me in them. Nor do I wish that for all of you. I’m stepping back. The last few weeks were helpful to process what happened with a community of AB’s fans. I thank you Karen for this blog, and everyone who put their time and care into trying to get the truth out on Instagram. At this point, now, to get drawn in any further is falling for Asia abuse, in my eyes, for me.

    I’ll be checking in whenever, if ever, more factual truthful information comes from Tony’s side. If there is more to say, I can totally understand holding on to it until the right time, whatever the right time means for AB’s family and friends, for when a public opinion tide comes along, or to show the concrete evidence that refutes AA’s lies and omissions.

    Meanwhile, this is playing out in Penthouse and Playboy for cripe’s sake. I could agree with mainstream media if they think AA is not worth coverage, and I’d say don’t give her the attention. Maybe a discussion between Penthouse and Playboy is all she’s worth — that’s her kind of ballpark. Says a lot.

  49. gettngclear says:

    Please forgive this tangential question. What was Steve Bannon doing on a talk show in 2011? Had the general public been aware of him b4 2015?

  50. catsworking says:

    Lynn, thanks for those two links. Looks like Playboy is essentially giving her a pass; omitted mention of the Hugo photos, only the seemingly innocent hand-holding with Raz.

    The Daily Mail account of her behavior this weekend — wow. She’s mourning Tony by posting nude selfies like some 16-year-old porn star wannabe. Pathetic.

    If there’s one thing NO ONE on this planet can ever accuse AA of, it’s having class.

    Bill Maher is certainly a bundle of contradictions. I can just hear him saying, “I don’t want any animals to be mistreated. I just don’t want them anywhere around me. They behave like animals.”

  51. Morganlf says:

    I hope this link works. Lots of pics of young Ottavia, Ariane .Tony and in her own words:

  52. catsworking says:

    bamboo, I apologize that your comments keep getting delayed in moderation. I’ve searched for a way to fix it and can’t find one. But it sounds like you’re going on hiatus anyway.

    Whenever I gain new facts or there are any developments in this, I’ll do a post on the front page for people who don’t want to wade through all these comments. If feijicha is correct and Hugo’s about to flip and cash in, then there you go.

    I wrote my earlier comment to Lynn before seeing yours and noted that Playboy omitted the Hugo photos. She’s getting ink the “girlie” mags because she puts herself out there as a piece of meat that will fuck anything. She derives self-esteem from shocking people. We see her trying harder and harder to shock.

    Like with Trump and his barrage of daily abuse, people have to eventually turn away and say, “Enough!” Same with AA. She’ll have to keep topping herself with grossness to maintain attention. She’s headed for a bad end, I can feel it.

  53. catsworking says:

    Welcome, gettinglclear! I was surprised to see Bannon myself. Yes, he was out there pushing the alt-right agenda, but I can’t say that I’d heard of him in 2011. According to Wikipedia, he was in showbiz during that phase. When Andrew Breitbart, who was publishing the notorious website named for him, died suddenly in 2012, I think Steve went returned to that side because he’d been one of the site’s founders.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Steve_Bannon

  54. L Villeneuve says:

    I saw a lovely letter on Josh Homme’s twitter page that AB wrote to JH’s daughter after she was upset that her Dad’s guitar had been smashed by Tony. It was well thought out and tender with “minimal swearing” and I think you all would enjoy it. Unfortunately I can’t post it here but if you look it up its current.

  55. catsworking says:

    LV, I took a screenshot of that letter that I think is legible. When I do another post, depending on the subject, I may use it.

  56. Daisy says:

    Bamboo wrote,

    “Meanwhile, this is playing out in Penthouse and Playboy for cripe’s sake. I could agree with mainstream media if they think AA is not worth coverage, and I’d say don’t give her the attention. Maybe a discussion between Penthouse and Playboy is all she’s worth — that’s her kind of ballpark. Says a lot.” Well said!

    Let’s see if hugo spills the beans and what media outlet will carry that one. I am sure if he does we will gain insight into what really happened that week.

    Cats, Interesting you should say that you feel a bad end is coming for AA. I have had that same feeling. This is like watching a train wreck.

  57. Mira says:

    I tried to link here the sweetest of photos, Bourdain and his friend Eric Ripert on a tandem bicycle, on their last shoot in France.
    Its idyllic, somewhere in an Alsace forest. When I first saw it, in the immediate aftermath, I still had no knowledge of his personal hell he was going through. And I was confused, thinking, how could someone surrounded by friends and the idyllic countryside do that?
    But then of course, now we all know what happened.
    I hope someone is able to uploaded it here.
    P.S. Karen, I had no idea, until i had a bit of a look around your website, that you actually teach people how to write! I would have asked you to proof read and edit all my comments :). (English is not my first language).

  58. catsworking says:

    Mira, I have seen the photo of Tony and Eric on the bike and imagine Eric must think of that scene now. They were totally together then, but then Tony went his separate way.

    I hope CNN and ZPZ find some way to use the footage they filmed for Season 12 to do something so it’s not all lost. Tony isn’t here to do the voiceover, but it was his vocation and what he did film should be preserved if at all possible.

    Mira, I have noticed that English may not be your first language, but I wasn’t sure. I do little tweaks to fix obvious typing and spelling errors when I notice them, but I am happy to do more, now that I know that’s what you want. 🙂 PS: Your English is excellent!

    Daisy: Your description of AA as a “train wreck” is spot on. That’s what we’re seeing. And like with Tony, there’s no stopping it. Only in this case, the world may be spared some future hours of gross, low-budget porn of the most profane, perverted kind that adds nothing to humanity. Such is the “art” of AA.

    PS: Watched the Berlin episode of Parts Unknown tonight. Remember, that’s where AA went when the Italian press rejected her version of “poor little innocent victim” of Harvey Weinstein. The way Bourdain portrayed the city, it totally makes sense it would draw her — they accept artists with talent or not. I don’t know the shooting schedule, but maybe it coincided with when she was licking her wounds there so he could be near to support her. A crew member would know.

  59. Lynn says:

    I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone post such self serving insane shit after losing someone they purport to love. That Playboy article mentions that Michelle Williams was blamed for Heath’s suicide. I never heard that, but if true, she was an ADULT and stayed quiet. You didn’t see her posting bizarre crap, middle fingers and photos of Heath. She kept her own counsel and laid low. And Eric R. is posting stuff that shows he’s going about his life, but isn’t saying a word about AB or posting any pics of them together. That’s what a normal person does in the public eye following suicide of a loved one. I guess next she’ll shave an image of AB into the fur of her cat.

    It amazes me how many of Tobacco Cooch’s cult on Twatter just completely disregard 1. the pics 2. the unfollowing/blocking between her and AB days before he died, 3. the ‘f you all’ t shirt she took down after the news hit and 4. the biggest doozy of all, AA was not invited by the fam to the memorial, plus Ottavia and Sandra R. posting tacit agreement with the Penthouse piece and JFT.

    Ashtray Argento’s supporters are like Trump’s. I suppose all that is ‘fake news’? And shockingly the media is on their side. Everything is publicity to her.

    Bamboo, I get what you’re saying, but I don’t see AA as ‘stealing energy’ from me. I find her interesting in the same way I find, say, Jeffrey Dahmer interesting. How could he eat people? And how could she be the way she is? What mental illnesses does she have? The immaturity and cray cryptic posts are entertainment for me. I enjoy hating her and wishing her ill. I enjoy the nausea I feel looking at her disgusting tats. It’s literally like going to a freak show at the state fair. So I choose to take peeks at her social media feeds. Eventually I’ll grow tired of it and stop. Hell, the way she smokes she’ll prob be on 24/7 oxygen in a few years or be talking through a hole in her throat like Jimbo on South Park.

    Like Daisy said, it’s a train wreck and I’ll enjoy watching.

  60. feijicha says:

    random thoughts have popped into my head after stepping away from reading any new stuff re: AB

    Given Asia’s admission of having affairs with people she works with — because she’s bored, because they’re there blah blah– and then, when they finish working together, she’s ready to move on… I was thinking about how she was with Tony long enough to get the gig directing the HK show– a job, one more feather in her cap, etc… and then, time to move on. Maybe she, in a move that would seem consistent with her past actions and her stated approach, decided she was done with their relationship and ready to move on with Hugo or whoever. Tony, of course, thought the relationship was far more serious and would go on and on and on. Maybe he’d move in with her at some point (he said “it wouldn’t suck” and told People he tried to spend as much time with her as he could). He also told People that neither of them held it against the other if they went off to do work “work comes first”…. yet maybe he didn’t realize the deal was when you go off to work it means the other person can then have public relationships with other people?

    I dunno. The whole thing is crazy and sad. It’s late and I’m not articulating clearly but guess my point is there seems to have had to be a fundamental misunderstanding between them about what their status was.

  61. Mira says:

    For all Bourdain aficionados, there was another link I wanted to post, to a 2 hour long interview for the American Archives of Television, done in 2015; the link can be found on reddit, if not easily accessed on you tube. It focuses more on the professional, not so much personal, but it has got a lovely respectful considerate tone, and if you have not seen it, I’m sure you will all enjoy it.

    ( and P.S. thanks Karen :), I just wanted to apologise for the not so perfect grammar/syntax, all I can remember from English grammar lessons is ‘SWOMPT’; in my native language, the arrangement of words in a sentence does not matter, because their role is defined by the declination that is used. As long as it makes sense, I’m happy, I wouldn’t want you to waste your time on it, but if it’s a complete logical mess, please step in! : ) )

  62. wearesiameseifyouplease says:

    “Taken out and shot”?

    Bourdain’s recent shows in WV and MT show he was willing to reach out in understanding.

    I’ve appreciated this site, because I believe Bourdain suffered greatly from his contact with a malignant narcissist. I hope you will reconsider your comments.

  63. iwonder says:

    Just a little extra insight into when Tony commented here at Catsworking many years ago under the moniker bobsyouruncle…

    Here it is for reference, bobsyouruncle commenting on another person’s comments regarding his first marriage from another commenter, joantoast.

    bobsyouruncle says:
    September 16, 2009 at 11:31 am
    “Joan Toast is way off base. I knew both of them back in the eighties and nineties. A classic case of codependant junkies. A 20 year relationship with each other and with drugs. After working for a very brief time after graduation she never returned to a full time job. The two of them were a shifty pair. Watch Drugstore Cowboy and you get that marriage nailed. I didn’t trust either of them.”

    To follow on, here is the excerpt from Medium Raw, published June 8, 2010:
    “Of my first marriage, I’ll say only that watching Gus Van Sant’s Drugstore Cowboy—particularly the relationship between Matt Dillon’s Bob and Kelly Lynch’s …”

    Bob’s Yer Uncle is a song by Happy Mondays – basically a bunch of Manchester drug dealers who formed a band in the 80’s. When they recorded their fourth album in Barbados, they sold all of their equipment and the furniture of where they were staying to buy crack off the rock. They came back with raging crack habits and no album and bankrupted the record label, Factory Records.

    Lyrics to Bob’s Yer Uncle:

    What do you want to hear when we’re making love
    What do you want to hear when we’re making love
    Can I take you from behind and hold you in my arms
    What do you want to hear when we’re making love
    Can I take you from behind and feel you in my heart
    What do we need to re-live to bring us close
    Why don’t you do it to me
    Why don’t you do those things to me
    Why don’t you do it to me
    Why don’t you do those things to me
    Four fall in a bed, three giving head, one getting wet
    Four fall in a bed, three giving head, one getting wet
    What do you want to hear when we’re making love
    Can I hold you from behind and tell you that it’s me
    Why don’t you do it to me
    Why don’t you do those things to me
    Why don’t you do it to me
    Why don’t you do those things to me
    The love drug is a bug that cuts us both up
    Why don’t you do those things to me
    Why don’t you do it of me, why don’t you do those things to me
    What can I say to you when we’re making love
    I could take you from behind and make you live
    What do you need me to say when we’re making love
    I can take you from behind and then I’ll forgive
    Why don’t you do it to me
    Why don’t you do those things to me
    Why don’t you do it to me
    Why don’t you do those things to me

  64. catsworking says:

    iwonder, what wonderful research! We never ascertained 100% that bobsyouruncle was Tony, but you pretty much sewed it up here. And did you notice that he died exactly 8 years to the day after the publication of Medium Raw?

    We did, however, determine JoanToast’s identity, and she was absolutely someone who would have known Tony and Nancy well during the time in question.

  65. catsworking says:

    Welcome, wearesiameseifyouplease. Had to check back to verify I made the comment you quoted. Guilty as charged. But it was a brief digression into politics, not a pronouncement about the “malignant narcissist.”

    As for Trump and his cheerleaders in Congress and supporters around the country, I’ll “reach out in understanding” when Trump stops ripping the guts out of everything decent this country stands for and they stop applauding it. Maybe they will when they all lose their jobs because his ridiculous tariffs sent the jobs overseas, and they lose access to affordable healthcare because the “something terrific” he promised to replace the ACA with is actually NOTHING. Or maybe when they end up in prison camps in the desert because he woke up one day and decided he just doesn’t like the cut of their jib anymore.

  66. catsworking says:

    feijicha, I agree that she seemed to follow her usual pattern with Tony. They were a thing for nearly two years, and when he failed to make her an international celebrity like himself, she dumped him.

    His comments about living with her were within the past few months, I believe, so they would indicate he was still fully invested in the relationship.

    If she lasts so long, I’m wondering at what point AA will turn on him and dismiss him as someone she had an expedient affair with because they were working together. Or if she’ll go full Weinstein on his memory and claim he forced himself on her, and that’s how it all began. I wouldn’t put anything past her.

  67. catsworking says:

    Lynn, “Tobacco Cooch?” “Ashtray Argento?” You are becoming almost poetic!

    I’m still monitoring the situation, but I really don’t think of AA unless I’m on the blog. She’s the next train wreck coming through the tunnel, so it’s hard to completely turn away until the inevitable crash.

  68. feijicha says:

    bob’s your uncle is a very old English expression. Kinda like, ‘and there you go’. I have an older Brit friend and it’s one of his fave expressions.

    Karen, I didn’t get that you were being asked to tone down your political opinions, just the references to violence i.e. taken out and shot. I normally wouldn’t personally get too excited by such an expression, but given how that sort of language has been co opted by our dear leader to speak to his followers, and given that they take it literally and act on it (see 5 dead journalists this past week) I’m inclined to kindly suggest that we not sink to their level at least not here. Just a thought.

  69. creiber says:

    So the “white people” comment is in reference to Leah McSweeny, the author of the Penthouse opinion article and some texts between her and a black SNL comedian, where she was trying to set up a date. How unfortunate for her that he posted screenshots of the conversation. What a D#ck.
    Still do not get the comet/Argento reference.

  70. bamboo.skewer says:

    Ha ha, Lynn, well here I am still here. I am fascinated by Jeffrey Dahmer too. I had a Ted Bundy back in the 80s as a young teen! With AA, I like to pick apart her communication strategy, what she’s doing to win the court of public opinion, what could be done to counteract her. Because that’s where the ballgame is now. It’s entertaining.

    However, I did get drawn in and over past weeks too much time of my life was stolen, really, not productive after a certain point. Maybe that was a seedy underbelly stage, finding out what the heck she is. It’s like drinking too much and getting stinking drunk on Bud Light. YUCK. What a waste of an evening of life. I’m drinking better stuff enough now about AA to have a good evening only.

    I was also surprised to see Michelle Williams dragged into the Playboy article. Maybe there was something I missed, but I do keep up on celebrity gossip and there was no big mention of Heath being traumatized by Michelle as a reason for his death. It sounded like an unintended overdose. He took a combo of drugs that interacted with fatal results. We’ve since learned the big problem with opioids. There was far more mention of the Olsen twins’ involvement. I thought there was a lot of sympathy for Michelle.

    I am curious if the Bill Maher “white people” comment had any relation to white people shot taken at Leah, or was that coincidence. I thought Bill + Playboy = BFFs 4 EVUH and is he part of a coordinated campaign roll-out for Asia’s benefit? Instagram commenters have been blasting the crap out of Asia and using bomb, explosion emojis so the fiery comet strike Asia … yeah the Argento version of Asia is the first thing I thought.

  71. catsworking says:

    feijicha, perhaps you haven’t seem my Trump posts. I agree with you about sinking to their level, but it’s too late. 😉

  72. catsworking says:

    creiber posed the “white people” translation while bamboo’s comment was still in moderation, so how we have 2 independent opinions that Maher was referring to Leah McSweeney.

    Not sure I follow it, but if you’re saying he’s somehow endorsing AA to spit on Tony’s grave I’m going to cancel my DVR recording of his new standup special this weekend, and I will be finished with Real Time. He’s a much smaller man than even his petite size would indicate.

    I knew nothing of Heath Ledger, so I can’t add anything to that conversation.

  73. Morganlf says:

    Wonder I get it. He used an old Brit catchphrase which had a more modern ironic twist. Clever.

    That boy taught me a lot of arcane things, like Brompton Cocktail, which I’d gladly serve certain whiskey voice, no talent, soul-devouring “actress”.

  74. Lynn says:

    I don’t think Maher meant anything by ‘white people’ beyond that in his estimation most of Tony’s fans and those buzzing about his death are white.

    A ‘my vagina is like a trashed drug den after a raid’ A did herself no favors with black women after her dis of Ava Duvarney at Cannes.

    OH, finally something useful from her twitter feed:

    “Prosecutors filed new charges against Harvey Weinstein. They include felony charges for predatory sexual assault against a third woman, which carries a maximum sentence of life in prison.”

    I see she’s turned comments back on in her IG, posting a pic of her kids. And the comments are already making me proud. Aside from the ones calling her devil, evil, and cheater, there is this:

    “Why did Tony BLOCK you before committing suicide? Did it have anything to do with the other guy you were caught cheating with? Everyone around AB knew you were bad news, but love is blind and unfortunately AB saw it too late and he died of a broken heart 💔 #karmaisabitch”

  75. feijicha says:

    Regardless of whether Maher thinks Tony’s audience is mostly white– which in itself would indicate a shocking lack of awareness of his work, which most often features the cultures, histories, cuisines and issues of NON white people– it also reflects a lack of awareness of him as a person who had friends of all colors and ethnicities. The “all white” tag, no matter how you slice it, just doesn’t fit with Tony and who he was. He made good friends with people all over the world who were not white and those people are just as upset by his death as any white person. So it’s not just white people who are upset by his death.

  76. Morganlf says:

    Feijicha…did you know Tony and his friends? Just asking it seems you know him so well.
    Maybe you could fill us in on so many details we crave. I knew him and Ottavia a bit , but you seem to know more!

    Thanks for your insight, it’s been great!

  77. Mira says:

    Just some thoughts…after almost one month of processing it all….

    When you put someone’s life under a microscope, and look at the depth and width of connections, you may discover that there is not much depth. Bourdain had a lot of so called friends, but mostly either from his professional or drinking circles; or friends who had their own families and he caught up with them a couple of times a year. He spoke of it many a time, that he cannot really nurture friendships, as he is on the road 250 days a year. Even his crew would be on rotation, and he would be the only one constantly working, on the road, and burning out.

    When you look at his ‘romantic’ relationships, specifically the last one, he only saw her on a few occasions this year, if you look at their social media footprint.

    He spoke to a friend of coming back to his New York flat, a ‘featureless’ place, probably just a place he slept over when on his 5 days per months attempt to spend time with his daughter.
    He reached out to fellow depression sufferers, again, mostly via social media and sought solace.

    When you are in the depths of despair, being around people who are leading supposedly happy lives, being surrounded by a beautiful landscape, just amplifies and underlines the pain and emptiness in your own life.

    I am still haunted by that idyllic image of Bourdain on the tandem bike, with his good friend in France; I look at his face, and his spirit is broken.

    Lets not delude ourselves, when you are on your own, in a hotel room, with everyone else going their merry way, including the supposed love of your life, you are in a dark dark place, and the twitterverse and chatrooms are no substitute.

    I guess the only thing that can save you, from that wretched heartbreak ache is maybe your pet, but being on the road, he would have been denied that source of unconditional love.

  78. Morganlf says:

    Mira, well said! From what I knew of Tony he’d have loved this dissection of his deep, dark self.

    Are there still chat rooms?
    Golly I’m so out of it!!

    Thanks for your informed analysis. I’m sure Ottavia finds it comforting.

    I’ve never delved into his depressive, psychosis…since I’m not competent to.
    But I appreciate your insight. Thanks!

  79. wearesiameseifyouplease says:

    I’d stopped watching Anthony Bourdain awhile back for various reasons.

    His death hit me in an unexpected way.

    In a foolish fashion, I started piecing together the timelines.

    My, very uninformed take: he had his ups and downs in his marriage, which is only to be expected in any marriage. Ups and downs were accentuated because of his chosen career. His wife loved him very much, and sometimes felt a bit insecure – again, perfectly understandable in any marriage, but especially these two.

    Bourdain had always cherished a celebrity crush. He had the chance to meet the person in real life, and the celebrity crush was translated into infatuation. He left his marriage and his daughter for said infatuation. He made excuses in public for it. Perhaps he made excuses in private for it as well.

    But he did not choose well. His infatuation was not with something real, it was with an image that did not hold up to daylight. A tremendous tragedy.

  80. Morganlf says:

    Wearsia…
    “He left his marriage and daughter for a sad infatuation…he made excuses for it,,,but he did not choose well…”

    Sho you right. Truth.

  81. Mira says:

    Thanks Morgan, I had a need to say this, as there is this perception that he led this charmed life, and at times it felt like he himself dared not complain about it, as if, it might appear ungrateful…He mentioned somewhere that his then wife, was the only one who knew it was not a ‘dream job’. Of course, I have no insider knowledge, I am merely another fan, who has been obsessing about it and pouring through pages and pages of info available on internet. But I have watched so many of hours of interviews with him, that I feel like I know him.

    In case his loved ones are reading this blog, my heart goes out to you, there is no consolation, other than he had a rich life, and gave so much hope and love to so many. There are so many accounts of people testifying that his was the only program they could enjoy and take comfort from and be entertained and soothed by his voice, whilst in hospital bed somewhere, or in the grips of depression.

    I myself found out about his death, three weeks after my mother died – I was trying to find some of his episodes on you tube, because I was so distraught with grief, only No Reservations came to mind, as something that would not be jarring; and the first thing that appeared was the news of his death. Since then, I sort of escaped into delving into the circumstances of his death, instead of dealing with my personal grief.

    Lots of love and hugs to all out there who are missing their loved ones.

  82. izzy1957 says:

    LOL – can’t help it. AA must be obsessed with checking her social media platforms. How does she find time to smoke?

    Lynn, her Instagram account only had the comments turned on “briefly” for the pic she posted of her two kids with another child that sometimes seen with her family.

    When I checked about an hour ago, I noticed the comments were disabled again, but not before I captured a screen shot. The comments were not too bad at all that I saw, but someone did post that she deleted a “fuckton of comments”.

  83. izzy1957 says:

    And, Morganlf – thanks for posting that video of Fightland with AB, Ottavia with the early pics of Ariane. That was quite interesting, and I have to say, I quite liked Ottavia. Don’t know why I was surprised to hear the Italian accent though, lol.

  84. catsworking says:

    Lynn, I saw in today’s paper that Weinstein’s got new charges against him.

    I think AA’s going to catch flak for Tony for the duration. If more info ever comes out about their interactions before his death (i.e., text or voice messages), I think she’s toast. The family may never reveal that information just to keep from launching a new shit storm of indignation from Tony’s fans.

    Still am trying to figure out why Maher dragged white people into his Tony dig. He and anybody else has no freaking way of knowing if most of his fans are white. He was international. Sheesh.

  85. catsworking says:

    Mira, I just read a lengthy interview Tony did in April that addresses a lot of what you’ve brought up. I probably won’t get to it today, but I’m going to see if I can locate it online because I think it deserves a post of its own on the front page. Stay tuned…

  86. catsworking says:

    Mira, so sorry to hear about your mother. It’s interesting that you turned to No Reservations to take your mind off your loss. I think I would do the same.

    My DVR has been filling up with episodes of Parts Unknown to the point that something had to give, so last night I started culling the list. I’m sure I skipped ones where he was in what Trump would call “shitholes,” and I don’t feel more compelled to catch up with those now. I want to see him in beautiful places, particularly if he was with Eric or other friends (besides AA — she’s never touching my TV screen again).

  87. catsworking says:

    izzy, it sounds like AA is trying to clean up her social media presence by scrubbing the vitriol against her. Rotsa ruck with that. Before any of this happened, there was already enough out there about and by her to damn her forever as an irredeemable deviant. It’s disturbing to think that she’s allowed to travel freely and walk among us like a normal human being when she’s anything but.

    To be posting photos of her kids at this time is the epitome of poor judgment, IMO. Heaven help those kids, whose exposure to secondhand smoke all their lives is just the least of their worries.

  88. feijicha says:

    AA is now going after Ronan Farrow because he didn’t devote enough space to her story in his reports about sexual harassment. She claims his summarization of her story “ruined my life”. She won’t sue him because that will deter him from continuing to investigate sexual harassment but she’s considering writing a book so she can tell all about her story. This during a talk she gave at Harvard in spring, wearing her “I’m trying to look smart” glasses. Here’s a link: https://news.harvard.edu/gazette/story/2018/04/asia-argento-sets-the-record-straight-on-farrow-weinstein/

    A few highlights:

    Ronan Farrow won a Pulitzer Prize on Tuesday for his reporting in The New Yorker about the many sexual assault claims made against Hollywood producer Harvey Weinstein. Four days earlier, Italian director and actor Asia Argento, who had shared her own nightmare with Weinstein for the story, chastised Farrow for his “simplification.”

    Farrow, she said, hadn’t fully grasped the complicated nuance of her interactions with the powerful Weinstein in 1997 when she was 21, and how what she said were years of his stalking, manipulation, and “ultimate domination” of her had taken hold of her life and made her fear for her career and her safety.

    “I tried to explain this,” Argento told a crowd in Harvard Hall Friday. And while she acknowledged that Farrow couldn’t devote five pages to her story, she called his summary for the article “a simplification that ruined my life.”

  89. L Villeneuve says:

    how melodramatic…

  90. bamboo.skewer says:

    The Harvard article shows similar strategy as the Playboy article. Omit some things. Revise history. I would like to hear from AA a discussion about having an ongoing sexual relationship with Weinstein. Please. Help us understand this dynamic. Please explain more than just, “I felt I had to do it to have a career.” Because word is, there were financial benefits. Surely some in Italy know enough information that there are other reasons for their opinion of Asia, than misogyny. Of course, we know there will never be any straight answer, truth or accurate history from AA.

    It’s gross that Harvard gave her a platform.

    I just had the oddest thought. I almost wish that every damaging thing that people did to other people stuck on them permanently as a bad smell. The smell would add up over time. Some people would smell much worse than others. We would all easily know who to keep away from.

  91. Mira says:

    And re- the whole white people remark, on the Maher show, I saw it more as just a flippant remark, a dig at the AB obsession -( with one man’s death compared with all the atrocities that are happening), as a ‘first world problem’ or ‘white whine’. And the fact that we are analysing that remark ad nauseam, sort of confirms the show’s take on it.

  92. Laura N. says:

    Feijicha,

    She’s such a textbook narcissist. Of course she’s turned on Ronan Farrow. They were all smiles and buddy buddy on her Instagram a few months ago yet now his groundbreaking report has “ruined her life”. I’m sure her minions will go after him like they went after Ava Duvernay, who’s great crime was not bowing to Asia and calling her a magnificent goddess for her earth shattering speech at Cannes.

    And this leaves no doubt in my mind that eventually she absolutely would have turned on Anthony. At best, I could see her accusing him of being unsupportive of her as a “rape survivor”. At worst, implying that he was a predator himself. I put nothing past her.

  93. Mira says:

    And it just dawned on me, why was I so puzzled with AB’s attraction to her, – it’s the fact that she has no sense of humour, she is completely humourless.

  94. catsworking says:

    Feijicha, holy shit! And Bob’s your uncle. She IS thinking of a book, where she will throw Weinstein, Ronan “No Good Deed for Asia Goes Unpunished” Farrow, and Bourdain. Probably throw in Vincent Gallo, Hugo, and the paparazzi for good measure.

    Farrow failed to explain the “nuances.” Right. As in, she WASN’T raped. What Farrow did make very clear was her histrionics in the several interviews he had to have with her as she did her best to milk oral sex into a full-blown invasive procedure.

    Poor little Asia, all these men “ruin her life” when they notice her throwing herself across their paths, behaving like a piece of brainless, fuckable meat.

  95. catsworking says:

    Mira, you’ve probably got it right. It was witless and possibly a jealous shot at the guy who was taller, sexier, smarter, and more worldly than Maher could ever hope to be. Nerd waits until cool kid is down to get in his last kick.

  96. catsworking says:

    Laura, AA is probably pissed that Farrow earned a Pulitzer with her contribution and she did’t get a cut of it.

    Such a Trump move. Someone she likes has a triumph and she gets no credit, so she has to diss and try to negate it.

    How did we end up ass-deep in psychopathic narcissists?

  97. catsworking says:

    Mira, Bingo! NO SENSE OF HUMOR! Absolutely. But Tony did have one. It was sardonic, but he could crack a mean joke and did so frequently. He could also make fun of himself.

    Again, like Trump, AA is incapable of poking fun at herself or of tolerating anybody else doing it.

    (Sorry to keep bringing up Trump, but their personality disorders are extraordinarily parallel. Hope she never tries to get into Italian politics or they’re screwed.)

  98. Mira says:

    Yes, for someone so morally abhorrent, her twitter feed is full of faux moral outrage, calls for boycott this, boycott that. It never ceases to amaze me how men ( and women), completely lose their sense when infatuated with someone. There must have been so much denial and burying his head in the sand, on his part. I don’t know him, yet I am embarrassed for him, how much he put his reputation on the line defending her. I can only imagine how his friends and family felt, and in the end, when the penny dropped, how he felt.

  99. Daisy says:

    I have been thinking about AAs hold over him and It really does seem almost like a spell he couldn’t break away from no matter how destructive it became. I am sure it’s been posted here before but succubus fits the description of AA.

    From Wikipedia: A succubus is a demon in female form, or supernatural entity in folklore (traced back to medieval legend), that appears in dreams and takes the form of a woman in order to seduce men, usually through sexual activity. The male counterpart is the incubus. Religious traditions hold that repeated sexual activity with a succubus may result in the deterioration of health or mental state, or even death.

    In modern representations, a succubus may or may not appear in dreams and is often depicted as a highly attractive seductress or enchantress; whereas, in the past, succubi were generally depicted as frightening and demonic.

    We do know she is into witchcraft. I don’t know about demons but I do know there is evil in this world. What is even more astonishing is that AB had this infatuation with her for many years prior to their meeting. So who knows maybe this relationship was some kind of karmic destiny. Some things just may have to be lived and played out no matter how difficult they are or awful they end.

  100. catsworking says:

    Mira, I can’t help thinking how, in his last moment of life, Tony may have thought, “Wait a minute! What the fuck am I doing?” but it was too late. If he’d only given himself a few minutes to reconsider, he might still be with us.

    But even if he were, he’d still be going down the path to self-destruction, maybe prostrating himself at her feet, begging her to take him back in spite of all his “shortcomings.” Vowing to be better than Hugo.

    And in the final scene, it would end the same. Either him burning out or her flaming out. They were truly a match made in hell.

  101. Mira says:

    It’s interesting, it made me think of something he discussed in that 2 hour interview for the Archives of Television. He was talking about his early travel experiences, and positioning himself, like in a movie, and that he prefers to be the tragic hero, rather then something else, can’t remember. He certainly became a tragic hero of his own story.

  102. Mira says:

    Karen, I feel like he may have felt he was cornered, with no way out. Who’s to know. Either it was a totally impulsive act, and if he did not give in to that impulse, he may have weathered that storm.
    To get over this kind of heartbreak, would take months, but it was a lethal combination of humiliation and heartbreak, that he was dealing with. As I mentioned before, in those moments of tunnel vision, your judgement is completely impaired. His downfall was that he presented such a good mask of coping, to everyone else, and hence he did not get the help he needed.

  103. catsworking says:

    Daisy, I have no doubt that AA would consider it a compliment to be called a succubus, thrilled to have people believe she is demonic (which she is, but it’s of her own conjuring, nothing Satan would sanction).

    Her allure to Tony was pure evil, because beauty was never part of the equation. Scraggly, dirty hair reeking of cigarettes, skin smeared with tats, perpetually insolent, half-stoned expression, scrawny anorexic body. All this on the cusp of being a menopausal grandmother while having the perspective of a belligerent teenager. Some dream girl.

    Whatever this great intellect was that Bourdain was so enamored with has never surfaced in anything I’ve read. In any interview, she never expresses enthusiasm for anything. She’s bored, dismissive, condescending, or resentful toward everything.

    I really wonder what was going on with him deep down that he would allow himself be so totally duped by such a person.

    Maybe it was karma, some horrible holdover from a previous life that had to play out for Tony in this life.

    Here’s hoping the karma AA has accumulated in this lifetime of trying to destroy people, and sometimes succeeding, will play out for her one day as well.

  104. Mira says:

    He liked the ‘transgressive’, he mentioned that, and he was forever running away from his middle class suburban childhood. He mentioned Switzerland, as the only country he refuses to go to, on the count of it being too picture perfect, idyllic, it was his idea of hell.
    His taste in music and some movies and his dabbling in horror comics reflects this. For some reason he was afraid of having a ‘mediocre’ life. The more I think about it, the more his end makes sense. A self-destructive impulse carried out to its logical end.

  105. Lynn says:

    Maybe it was karmic ‘balance.’ I mean, consider how few people get published in the New Yorker ever, let alone their first time out. And then THAT article gets them a book deal because an editor or publisher reads it and thinks yea, that’s a book. And THEN that book is a best seller. And then Lydia from ZPZ thinks wow, the person who wrote that book should be on TV.

    Yes AB was talented, but many people are and don’t have this kind of luck. It’s like stuff just fell in his lap. (Remember the friend who hooked him up with a deal where a publisher paid him to go to Mexico to write a novel? Mind blowing. Who does that happen to? Most writers bust their asses to get just 1 editor or agent’s attention.)

    With AA it’s like the luck ran out. Or maybe he felt unworthy of it all and getting involved with her was a type of subconscious penance.

    “…the complicated nuance of her interactions with the powerful Weinstein in 1997 when she was 21, and how what she said were years of his stalking, manipulation, ”

    LMAO nuance? You banged him voluntarily for 5 years? That nuance? I do see how a woman, if her self esteem is nonexistent, could get involved with her attacker – but for FIVE YEARS?

    Mira, yes his taste was rather, well let’s just say he liked gross things (AA included). Who doesn’t want to visit a clean country? Clean doesn’t have to equal boring. Who likes garbage? It reminds me of that scene in Rocky where the young girl Marie is smoking and he says, “It makes your breath smell like garbage.” She replies, “yea well maybe I like garbage” and Rocky says, “C’mon, nobody likes GARBAGE.” It would appear Tony did. Stacked about 5 feet 6 inches high.

  106. Mira says:

    Lynn, I agree with you that he felt unworthy. Successful people often feel like they’re imposters, that they don’t deserve their success. Some people just get lucky, you have to have talent and work hard, but only few are in the right place at the right time, and then we get to know about them. Statistically it is just how things work.
    And you are probably right that his subconscious did not do him any favours. Freud wrote about our drives , instincts, Eros (life instinct) and Thanatos, his controversial death instinct , which was not so much accepted, but I see it in my everyday work all the time, and it manifests in so many ways.
    I think the Revolutionary Road ( both novel and film) described well that dread of living your life in ‘perfect’ suburbia.

  107. Morganlf says:

    I tried, Bruce, I fucking tried! Sarcasm ain’t for the dull witted.

  108. Mira says:

    Thanks for the link to that heartwarming article. Let’s cherish the memory of the lovely, kindhearted , sweet person he was. His life was not wasted.

  109. catsworking says:

    Lynn, you’re right about the odds of breaking into the New Yorker, but that article was far from his first published writing. He already had two novels under his belt, published by Bloomsbury: Bone in the Throat in 1995 and Gone Bamboo in 1997.

    I believe it was a friend who paid his expenses for several months to go off the grid and write one of the novels, and then maybe said friend had some contacts in publishing. I don’t remember the details. But no way would any publisher pay for an unknown, unproven writer to go anywhere to write a book, then or now.

    To get anyone’s attention at the New Yorker, there had to have been a cover letter mentioning his published credentials, and being a 2-time novelist would have gotten him a read.

    Over the years the story morphed into a flukey tale. He wrote this story about the restaurant business thinking nobody would read it and sent it off to that indie paper. When they kept bumping it, he withdrew it and sent it again to the New Yorker, not really knowing what he was doing.

    I was getting published in magazines at the same time (mostly trades, nowhere anywhere near as prestigious) and trust me, there was/is a rigid protocol. You didn’t just dash off some shit and send it wherever. He would have totally known that.

    Another reader (feijicha?) has sent me shots of pages of three “lost” short stories in magazines Tony had published even earlier. I haven’t been able to quite piece them together, but the bits I’ve read were pretty amateurish. But they show that Tony was plugging along, honing his craft, until he was professional-grade.

  110. feijicha says:

    Nope, not me.

    I agree with others who said part of him felt undeserving of all the good fortune. It seemed to be part of what drove him to always talk to anyone who approached him, sign every autograph, take every picture etc. Yet it would seem he did pay a price for this, having to submerge part of himself to be who people wanted him to be — in a similar way to his description of going out to eat and only wanting something small or simple but then the staff/chef figuring out he was there and sending dish after dish to his table… and his feeling obligated to accept it, eat it, even when not wanting it because he didn’t want to be rude and he was aware of possibly coming off as ungrateful or douchey. That has to take a toll.

    I was thinking the other night, not intentionally about him but it just sort of came to me…. I, like a lot of people originally thought, “how could he kill himself knowing poor Eric would be the one to find him?” (likely) or his crew or others close to him who would be so affected by it. Then I thought, maybe in his mindset that would have been comforting to him. I mean, if he killed himself somewhere random, who would find him? Would he be there for days and no one knew? Would some stranger do bad things to his remains? But if he kills himself where he was, he could trust that he’d be found, and found by people who would do the right thing…. I can’t explain exactly what I mean, and it may sound weird to other people, but I was just thinking that we see it from *our* perspective like how could he burden Eric this way, but maybe in his headspace he was thinking he was so in pain he wanted out, and it made him feel like it was ok to do it because his friends were there. Like it removed another impediment from doing it because he knew others he trusted would be there to deal with the aftermath. I mean who knows what’s in someone’s head when they decide to kill themselves, so I’m just pondering different perspectives.

  111. Lynn says:

    Ah yes, Karen I forgot the 2 novels came before the New Yorker. But still, this part is the most amazing to me:

    I believe it was a friend who paid his expenses for several months to go off the grid and write one of the novels, and then maybe said friend had some contacts in publishing.

    The way AB told it, this ‘friend’ remembered that he was a good writer from college, meaning he encouraged him to write a novel sight unseen of anything post-college, or certainly nothing published anywhere prestigious. And the fact that anyone would PAY someone’s way anywhere to write before they were an established writer continues to boggle. Of course back then it was not about how many blog or twitter followers you have. It wasn’t as much about ‘oh you don’t have over a set number of followers, how are we going to market this book?’

    Bruce E. has new blog posts and they’re awesome as usual:

    http://brucecameronelliott.blogspot.com/2018/06/the-question-rose-and-asia-and-their.html

    “Her dark and sullen eyes are consumed with a cold indifference even when she smiles. I think Anthony was secretly impressed with her cynical disregard for human life, and for her potential under the right circumstances to shed blood without mercy or remorse.”

    http://brucecameronelliott.blogspot.com/2018/07/more-comments-on-anthony-and-asia.html

    And this from his comments section lmao:

    “Also, Asia Argento is a disgusting troll with a fly infested cooter who the devil would kick out of bed if he happened to wake up next to. Beelzebub would poke his eyes out if he had to stare into her crater covered canyon. Did I mention she’s a poser who pretends to punk but is just an ignorant twat?”

  112. catsworking says:

    Feijicha, I have had my own dark logistical thoughts, and we are on the same page. Terrible as it was, he almost couldn’t have picked a “better” place. French countryside, where the authorities’ attitude we’ve seen have been stereotypically laissez-faire about getting to the bottom of things. Imagine what a brouhaha there would have been if he’d done it in his NYC apartment. It would have been like an episode of Law & Order. And how long would it have taken to determine him missing? (Probably not long, considering all the pots he had his fingers in. Someone would have missed him pretty quickly, I’m guessing.)

    But I agree with you. I think he felt safe with Eric and his crew and knew that they’d take care of him and understand. Far better than for Ottavia and Ariane to bear the brunt of it.

    If he’d REALLY wanted to fuck with AA, he’d have done it when he was with her. So I’d say when he made his decision to check out, she was an afterthought, if that. He didn’t care how it affected her. Just like she didn’t care how her behavior affected him.

  113. catsworking says:

    Lynn, so true, so true about someone having faith in his abilities to bankroll the first novel. In those days it was all about talent, with no “likes” or “platforms” or social media bullshit of any kind. I miss those days.

    Saw the comment you quoted. People are tagging AA as the self-created piece of shit she has made herself to be, ignoring all her protestations that the people she screwed over “ruined her life.”

    Now that we don’t have Bourdain’s exploits to follow, it’s all about watching that twisted twat unravel until justice is served. Karma is coming for her.

  114. Anita says:

    I’m watching the Miami show tonight from Parts Unknown 2015. AB looked great. Healthy, happy, interested, engaged. How the hell did he get from that to how he looked on this 2018 season? In 10 years my looks my have changed a lot, but now in 3 and AB and I were the same age. The only answer is AA. I’m past the shock point of my grief and getting into serious anger. AB was such a great voice for the common ordinary people all over the world. There will be no one that can take his place.

  115. catsworking says:

    Anita, I deleted the Miami episode from my DVR. I’ve spent a lot of time in Miami in South Beach, and so did Tony and Ottavia. Too sad. CNN is running another marathon this weekend that I also deleted. No AA episodes that I noticed. That said, I still have 23 hours stored. I want to see him with people who actually cared for him, so Eric, Zamir, and others take precedence.

    I’m Nancy’s age, one year Tony’s senior, and I didn’t age as much (or so people tell me). Between the jet lags and the pressure to keep up with a 42-year-old who wears her libido like a weapon (whether she ever feels anything or not), he did age beyond his years. My heart aches that he even tried to keep her satisfied because she’s a bottomless pit of greed and need that he fell into.

    And now that we have Trump committing human rights abuses willy-nilly like a tinpot despot who WANTS the world to hate us, we need Tony’s voice of reason and ridicule more than ever, but he silenced it. THAT makes me VERY angry.

  116. Lynn says:

    Can someone refresh my memory what the other episode was that the succubus appeared in besides Rome? I recall they were standing in some ancient, forgotten area that I thought oh damn I want to go there.

    Don’t forget the smoking and drinking. That ages you fast, too. Just look at Keith Richards.

  117. Mira says:

    Dear cat ladies, don’t let her get to you in this way, this is exactly what she would like. Let her sink into oblivion. He made a mistake, in trusting her, and he paid for it. And if it was not her, it would have probably been some other unhealthy obsession.

  118. Sonne says:

    Stupid Gringo this Maher, no one knows him outside of usa, while AB was known and beloved all over the world. And the jokes aren’t funny at all, any of them and the one about Tony just disgusting. They only get by with the help of those pathetic fake recorded laughters. Oh, and I agree, AA is just the worst with all of those stupid and ridiculous post like a inmature teenager playing badass so fake… I think AB would be very ashamed of that behavior. Greetings to all broken heart AB fans all over the world.

  119. Morganlf says:

    The episode was:Southern Italy …the heel of the boot is an episode the succubus appeared in heavily.
    Also Francis Ford Coppola..a real “get”, indicated Tony’s status as an international celeb interviewer.

    His wife, Ottavia, was glimpsed in a few episodes, but figured prominently in his early Twitter and blog posts on No Reservations, they were a very cute couple, that I had the privilege to observe up close,

  120. catsworking says:

    Mira, you’re right. The less attention she gets, the better. Starve the beast.

  121. Mira says:

    Yes Karen. I feel like I let that toxicity seep into me, I spent too much time sifting through various twitter feeds of these toxic individuals, and the back and forth of their defenders and accusers. It’s like borderline PD central. No wonder he killed himself, if he spent so much time with this kind, and got sucked into their social media wars.
    It is not a healthy place to be.
    I think I’ll stick to reading a good book:)
    If anyone can recommend a nice read for a holiday, I need a detox. 🙂

  122. catsworking says:

    Welcome, Sonne! You have a point about Maher. His “humor” is very U.S.-centric, so he probably has little appeal to the rest of the world. Possibly another reason he resented Bourdain.

  123. L Villeneuve says:

    Thank you Sonne, we are still missing him a lot!

  124. izzy1957 says:

    From tmz’s site:

    “Anthony Bourdain left a sizable estate behind and most of it is going straight to his 11-year-old daughter, Ariane.

    A copy of Bourdain’s will was filed in a New York court Thursday and the celebrity chef/TV host left behind about $1.2 million in known assets at the time of his death. That includes $425k in cash, $250k in personal property, $35k in brokerage accounts, and about $500k in royalties and residuals … according to the NY Daily News.

    Bourdain’s will also reportedly indicates an outstanding $1 million mortgage, but doesn’t specify the location of that property.

    Ariane gets the bulk of his assets, and his estranged wife, Ottavia Busia-Bourdain, is the executor of the will.”

  125. izzy1957 says:

    Few more details in Page Six’s article. Yes, a far cry from the estimated 16 million reported.

    https://pagesix.com/2018/07/05/anthony-bourdain-worth-only-1-21m-at-the-time-of-his-death/

  126. Lynn says:

    Wow that’s it?! I’m shocked. And I’d really love to know who considers $1.2 million ‘sizable’. Perhaps a broke Millennial working at TMZ lol.

    Also surprised he needed a mortgage at all.

    The investor geek in me notices he had way too small of a percentage of his assets invested in the stock/bond market.

    I wonder what his ‘wishes’ were regarding frequent flyer miles, furniture, etc. I would think some of those personal items could be auctioned for charity.

    Anybody have an idea what CNN was paying him?

  127. catsworking says:

    Why is a “guardian” being appointed for Ariane when she has a mother who is his legal wife and executor of the will? I don’t know much about this stuff, but that seems absolutely crackers to me.

    And if Ariane predeceased him, the NANNY would get everything? What’s her secret significance? WTF?

    What’s not mentioned is the disposition of royalties from his books and residuals from his TV work. He had many, many streams of passive income that could come in for many years. To name just one, how about the foreign rights to The Taste (if any country is still doing it)?

    This article seems laughably simplistic. Yes, maybe in the bank he had relatively little (sorry AA! Sugar Daddy not as sweet as you thought), but his earning potential is not addressed at all.

  128. Lynn says:

    So then what do they mean by ‘$500k in royalties and residuals’?

    Yes Karen that nanny part struck me as odd too, since he didn’t divorce Ottavia, I wouldn’t think she’d have gotten a settlement when they separated, and thus I would have thought he’d leave her something.

  129. Morganlf says:

    This is shocking and must be inaccurate. His salary alone had to approach a mil. Residuals of only 500k? Nonsense. We know what he paid for the condo 3.3 mil:

    https://variety.com/2014/dirt/real-estalker/chef-anthony-bourdain-buys-big-apple-combo-condo-1201237287/

    But if something happens it goes to the NANNY??!!

    There’s a story here. Not sure I want to hear it. It would mean someone had an axe to grind. 35k in brokerage account?

    That’s not possible. It does not add up.

  130. creiber says:

    Read ladies before going bonkers: An estate includes assets or property “WITHOUT a joint owner or named beneficiary”
    Assets he held in his name alone (without spouse) would be taxable to the estate.
    It also takes a year or more to settle an estate. So, you don’t put the joint checking account in probate, it automatically becomes the property of the survivng spouse.
    So I think it just means he was smart. ( i hope so, anyway)

  131. Morganlf says:

    Anderson Cooper is reported to earn 11 mil a year. Tony’s show was higher rated.

    Something ain’t right.

  132. creiber says:

    Also, someone needs to be named by the court as a trustee for the minor child’s money. ( that is the law) The court will probably appoint her mother as the trustee.
    I wouldn’t read too much into it. It was more than likely just estate planning.

  133. Adele Prass says:

    I have a text out to a friend, who does Family Law about the Guardian question. I wonder if the assets mentioned were those that existed in 2016, or those that exist now. Not to stir the AA pot, but if the assets are those that exist now, I wonder how much he spent on her.

    Re: the nanny. I know from reading Appetites that Ariane considered the nanny’s son as a brother, and in the absence of other information, I’m going to consider that Tony was thinking of the kid.

    Once again, we’re waiting for shoes to drop.

  134. creiber says:

    What I mean is that assests he held jointly would not be reportable to the probate court. Therefore, not reportable to the public.

  135. Adele Prass says:

    Thanks, creiber.

  136. Lenora says:

    Cat, This was all a long time ago, and I can’t explain the exact law behind it all, but when I was a minor, 17, my father died, my parents were divorced, my mother had full legal custody and the court appointed a legal guardian. My impression was the guardian appointment was just standard procedure when a minor was involved in a situation like this. Just a neutral observer to make certain the minor’s interests were protected.

    My bet (and hope) is that Bourdain had legally signed over most of his assets, maybe even the income from royalties, to Ottavia. So if he did that 2016 maybe all had left in 2018 was 1.5 million.

  137. Lenora says:

    It is pleasing that the nanny had a mention and Asia wasn’t even a thought. Granted the will was drafted before they were a real thing but he didn’t change it.

    If I am right and AB had signed over the bulk of his assets previously to Ottavia, I doubt the nanny mention is anything more than AB liking her and wanting the nanny to be provided for if something happened to his daughter. If god forbid his daughter died the nanny would no longer have a income.

  138. izzy1957 says:

    I agree with Lenora.

    1) The legal guardian appointment seems to more of a standard operating procedure to protect his daughter’s best interests possibly on advice he sought beforehand, and from what I read about inheritance in New York State, it seems to come into play more so where the inheritance is more than 10K.

    2) That he ensured Ottavia, the mother of his child was looked after both while he was still alive (when they split but didn’t formalize anything with divorce) and after he was gone. Whether with the condo they purchased and/or possibly other income streams or assets, but he obviously made provisions for both.

    Remember I posted this article before which only came out in March 2017 (after their split in 2016). He was generous to a fault and seemed to care and look after almost everybody in a sense. It mentions “a mortgage”; what his wealth is in comparison to estimated reports, and his attitude to investing money.

    See:

    “….I am fanatical about not owing anybody any money. I hate it. I don’t want to carry a balance, ever. I have a mortgage, but I despise the idea. That was my biggest objection to buying property, though I wasn’t in the position to pay cash.”

    “The reports of my net worth are about ten times overstated.”

    “I’d like my daughter and her mom looked after, both while I’m alive and after. They shouldn’t have to worry if something bad happens, so my investments and savings are based on that. I’m super-conservative. Money doesn’t particularly excite or thrill me; the making of money gives me no particular satisfaction. To me, money is freedom from insecurity, freedom to move, time if you choose to make use of time. My investments advisor understands that I’m not looking to score big on the stock market or bonds. I have zero understanding of it and zero interest. Life is too short. I like a limited amount of mail, and a limited amount of conversations with people who make the investments. If the money’s not less money every time I look at it, I’m pretty happy. If it’s a little bit more, great.”

    Footnote at bottom of article mentions same woman who is taking on helping put out that book in 2019: “As told to Laurie Woolever exclusively for Wealthsimple.”

    https://www.wealthsimple.com/en-us/magazine/money-diary-anthony-bourdain

  139. catsworking says:

    creiber, it sounds like you know about this stuff. Makes sense to me that the will would cover only what was in his name when he died. He must have left the bulk of joint assets with Ottavia when he moved out. But it sounds like he was still paying the mortgage on the condo, which had $1M left on the loan.

    The fluff in my tail over this news has smoothed out, but I’m still scratching my head over the nanny. Sure, Ariane’s best friend is apparently the nanny’s son (according to the cookbook Appetites), but why not set up a trust fund for him instead of just throwing everything to the nanny herself? That makes no sense to me.

    And you’ve got to consider the ENORMOUS amount of money the family must spend on MMA. I just watched an interview with Renzo Grazie where he said when Tony first took up the sport, he’d take a helicopter 2-3 times a week while they were vacationing in the Hamptons to come into Manhattan for lessons, and then fly back.

    I’m also surprised to see for the first time Ariane and Ottavia suddenly named Busia-Bourdain. Never knew they were hyphenating.

  140. catsworking says:

    Lenora, I wrote my response to creiber before I saw yours. We are of the same mind. And I suppose it’s fair of the court to appoint an impartial third party as guardian of a minor just in the case any family gets grabby to protect the minor’s stake. Not saying the Bourdains are. I’m thinking more about European royalty long ago when a king died, leaving a kid to inherit the throne and uncles would jump in, maybe marry the widow, and all the adults would assume power and run the country behind the kid’s back until he was old enough to figure it out and send them all to the Tower.

  141. catsworking says:

    izzy, thanks for that link to Wealthsimple. The thing that stuck with me most about that article (which reads like his assistant-turned-coauthor Laurie typed a transcript of him doing a monologue about money) was that he noticed his house growing up smelled of bacon. Every time I make bacon and stink up the house, I think of that.

    He also alludes to paying back the old college chum who must have bankrolled his trip to (I think the Caribbean) to write his first novel, and then hooked him up in publishing. No other explanation for why he’d split a $10K advance with someone.

    Like his parents, it seems he was willing to spend whatever he had on whatever he wanted in the moment. Hence, financing all the MMA for the family, keeping a girlfriend in Italy, etc. Amassing a huge fortune wasn’t his thing; he just wanted to make sure his wife and daughter would be set for the rest of their lives. I think I saw somewhere that he did those several stand-up tours in the fall a few years so he could make a lot of money quickly to finance Ariane’s college years.

  142. izzy1957 says:

    Karen, I’d like to think he didn’t pour too much money AA’s way, although I’m sure he was his usual generous self and paid and covered many things along the way.

    If anyone has noticed, her “estimated” worth has also been pegged at 16 million, but I also thought that when I read that it was probably way off base, and now, I’m sure it is reading details of what AB had left and what has been reported of his wealth. And,it’s not like she’s A-list. I’m sure she’s got some form of wealth accumulated, but I don’t think she’s swimming in tons of dough either.

    Also, I had read an article that said she doesn’t care for materialistic things, and that she doesn’t really have anything of great value in her home (someone had mentioned that from pictures seen out there, that her home didn’t seem to be especially handsomely furnished, etc., and she said if anybody wanted to steal or rob from her – like fuck off, go right ahead. This same article did state, however, that she did indulge in spending more on her kids’s education sending them to a good school. So, perhaps private school education?

    And, whether this is, in fact, all the truth, or just more so that she can pay for and manage her monthly ongoing expenses, who knows. She lives in a mansion yes, but neither is it the quintessential villa.

    Like has been said before, she is litigious, and she apparently had to spend lots of bucks to fight her daughter’s father in court for custody too, so that would have cost her some big bucks at that time.

  143. creiber says:

    Any Joe can go to the courthouse and request a copy of the will. It seems to me that the reporting on this is geared to be sensationalized.

    Anyway, someone had to be named to take the assets that were in his name alone. So the will could have stated daughter first, if she doesn’t survive, then my wife, if she doesn’t survive, then my brother, then the nanny, etc. We don’t know. And he may have made a trust for the nanny’s child, along with other family members.

    In any case, it is very likely that husband and wife did their wills at the same time, and whatever he wrote, Ottavia was at least aware of.

    Further, when you file for probate, you do a preliminary estimate of assets and debts, and pay taxes based on remaining assets. These are not final numbers. So the conservative estimate of $500k in royalties is good. That means he owes what he has in assets, and lower tax liability. I am actually surprised that the attorney filing was able to get all these numbers so fast to the court.

    If anyone here is married, you know that the 401k, joint accounts, the house(if it is joint), all pass to the surviving spouse.

    Like I said, I think that this is just an example of slanted journalism.

  144. izzy1957 says:

    And, there’s more info now – again TMZ – haha – probably posted elsewhere again, too.

    “Anthony Bourdain’s will surprised lots of people when it was revealed he died with around $1.2 mil in assets, because everyone thought he was way richer … turns out, he was.

    We obtained a copy of Bourdain’s will, and it appears he created a trust outside the will which contained an undisclosed amount of assets. It’s very common for rich folk to create trusts outside of their will … partly for tax purposes and partly for privacy.

    As we reported, the will discloses Bourdain left behind $425k in cash, $250k in personal property, $35k in brokerage accounts and around $500k in royalties and residuals.

    The will lists Ottavia Busia-Bourdain, his estranged wife, as trustee. The will was signed in 2016, after they had separated.

    Bourdain committed suicide last month in France.”

    Smart man, who obviously got some good advice.

  145. izzy1957 says:

    The New York City condo, which Bourdain and Busia bought in 2014, is not listed in the will, according to Page Six, but the filings indicate a $1 million mortgage liability for an unspecified property. “I own an apartment with a mortgage that my ex-wife and my daughter live in, and I’m a renter. I should always be a renter,” Bourdain told PEOPLE in February. “I regret buying that apartment. The bank owns it, and then you’re stuck with it.”

    https://people.com/food/anthony-bourdain-will-worth-daughter/

  146. Adele Prass says:

    Orange Janitor on IG said he was quoting an unimpeachable source and that Tony bought AA a house in Rome. He said that it was in her name.

    My lawyer friend also said that it was standard procedure when parents were divorced or estranged to appoint a guardian to oversee the interests of a minor.

    Somehow the info about the will, complete or not, makes things all so final; I’m really sad. He should be here to watch Ariane grow up.

  147. Mira says:

    Why this obsession with his will, and money? Why so surprised that he himself did not care so much about it, beyond providing for his family?

    His ex lives in the apartment he bought for them whilst together, with the MMA trainer, that she had on instagram photos whilst still supposedly living with AB; you keep talking of AB leaving her, but it was so obvious to everyone, that he was the one left behind.

    He would come once a month to NY, spend a few days in a ‘featureless’ rental, to spend some time with his daughter, and the rest of his time, on planes, in airports, in soulless hotel rooms.

    He finds this old fantasy of his, pins all his hopes on her, this inevitably ends not the way he was hoping, and we are surprised why he was depressed, why he lost hope? A man that everyone can see was a hopeless romantic, and dramatic, and just too sensitive. There is the very thin mask of machismo and bravado, and underneath the softest of shells. You know now from his many an account that he was suicidal after the 20 year marriage ended, you know that after the second marriage ended, and he immersed himself into that stupid MMA just to be closer to his wife, and got badly injured, and went to France on his own to lick his wounds, he speaks of the ‘accidental ‘ overdose on pain killers, losing consciousness in some cafe, sending an email to his first wife, all apologetic about leaving her. He took relationship break ups hard. And he strikes me as a very loyal person.

    Let the man now rest in peace.

  148. feijicha says:

    from what I’ve seen, people haven’t read the will carefully. It states that if Bourdain outlived his daughter, then Ariane’s share would go to the nanny. All his will talks about is what goes to his daughter. It doesn’t touch on whatever he had in trust, which presumably is the larger portion of his estate including valuables such as art, property, etc. So he clearly saw his daughter, followed by the nanny’s kid, as the next generation he wanted to help. Ottavia will be looking after her and Ariane’s finances, Ariane is left money strictly to her (which is a smart move in case unscrupulous people spend everything before she is of age… which is NOT a dig at Ottavia, but unscrupulous financial advisors are not unheard of, so he split out cash for Ariane directly, and apparently in the trust or trusts is money for her education and who knows what else). Should Ariane die before Anthony, he set it up so that if/when something happened to him, that bit of money would go ultimately to this other kid, whom his daughter supposedly thinks of like a sibling. The money goes to the kid’s mother but is intended for the kid. Lovely and generous, as we would expect. I’m sure the finances re: Ottavia were carefully laid out in the divorce documents and so would not be made public here.

  149. feijicha says:

    Mira, I agree with all you say about Tony. I don’t think people are curious about the money (not obsessed) because they want to know how much he had, really, they are more concerned and hoping that AA did not profit from his death any further than she profited while he was alive. No one cares that he left money to his child, or his ex-wife, and maybe even some to Nancy for all we know, or his brother or whoever. Ottavia is the mother of his only child, whatever went between them, so no one is surprised by this. It would be a bummer if the last woman to break his heart profited, although if that was what he’d wanted, you’re right, it would ultimately be no one’s business.

  150. catsworking says:

    Mira, it was Tony’s wish to move out of the family home and get his own place about 4 months after his affair with Asia started, right about the time he was placing the announcement of the separation in the media unbeknownst to Ottavia.

  151. Anita says:

    If AB truly paid for a house for AA and she turned around and openly or secretly had an affair she is due whatever karma and criticism she deserves.

  152. catsworking says:

    feijicha, I think you’ve got it right. I’ve learned that the nanny’s child was practically raised alongside Ariane and is considered almost a son, so the Bourdains wanted to ensure he was taken care of for all the years he and his mother were companions to Ariane.

    There were no divorce documents. The were separated, but no formal divorce proceedings were underway. The will was drafted after they separated so Ottavia and Ariane would be taken care of, no matter what.

    I think the Page Six article was slanted to make it seem like Bourdain was a spendthrift, or perhaps it was implying that he sank a bundle in AA and left himself with relatively little cash on hand.

    Now we learn that indeed he bought AA a house in Italy, so that theory seems to be borne out. Don’t know if he paid all cash for it, but fingers crossed he only made the down payment and left her with a mortgage.

    In one of the interviews with her I’ve read, she said she likes to take one lucrative gig at a time and live off that for a year before seeking more work. Her work ethic is hand to mouth, and obviously if she can find some man to sponge off so she doesn’t have to work at all, even better. She could shame a leech.

  153. catsworking says:

    feijicha, you’re right. It’s totally not that we care about how much wealth he amassed. If Ottavia’s been left with a $1M mortgage on her home and Asia is walking away with a new house he may have bought her all cash, free and clear, after seeing photographic evidence of the way she treated him, we have a problem.

    I know nothing about how Italian real estate works, but it seems a home sale should be a matter of public record and someone in the business could find out if there’s a mortgage on the property or not.

    Mira, since you seem to be satisfied that all questions have been answered and you’re ready to move on from this, then thank you for visiting Cats Working and contributing and I wish you the best.

  154. Bunny says:

    Heard “Cant’s stand losing you” on the radio today, and sadly thought of AB 😦

  155. Mira says:

    Thank you Karen, and thank you to all cat ladies 🙂 , its been a very supportive and welcoming safe space; your heart is in the right place, and keep up the good work.

  156. Lynn says:

    “It’s totally not that we care about how much wealth he amassed.”

    I do. I always want to know what people make and what they’re worth, whether they’re my friends or celebs. Of course I don’t ask anyone, I just wonder.

    One thing that stands out to me in AB’s money-related interview is he says he knows nothing about investing and has no interest. Fair enough, but that leaves you open to advisers who make bad decisions. Not saying his did; just saying it’s always best to learn about something (as well read as he was he could have easily learned) and not rely exclusively on others to invest your $.

    No surprise $ didn’t excite him. He didn’t have any until his mid-40s. If he cared about making a lot of $, he wouldn’t have become a chef.

    Are we sure he bought Rotten Crotch a house? Gawd, not surprising but soo just…. PUKE.

    “She said she likes to take one lucrative gig at a time and live off that for a year before seeking more work. Her work ethic is hand to mouth, and obviously if she can find some man to sponge off so she doesn’t have to work at all, even better.”

    I can’t criticize Ciggy Face for this. I don’t blame her. I’m self employed and hate working, so if I can make enough off one gig to last me, all the better. More time to travel. And if a rich man was dumb enough to buy me property, or let me “sponge” off him so I didn’t have to work as hard, I’d jump on that shit. Working sucks. But since she I thought LOOVED her work, ahem ‘art’, it surprises me she doesn’t want to do it very often.

    “His ex lives in the apartment he bought for them whilst together, with the MMA trainer, that she had on instagram photos whilst still supposedly living with AB; you keep talking of AB leaving her, but it was so obvious to everyone, that he was the one left behind.

    I don’t know that it’s clear who cheated first. It sounded like they drifted apart, mostly due to his schedule. If O was ‘blindsided’ by AB’s announcement that they were living separate lives, perhaps she hooked up with the trainer after that.

  157. catsworking says:

    Lynn, I’m also self-employed and I’m more like a squirrel gathering nuts than the hand to mouth type. Save as much as I can while I’m earning to get me through the lean times, and NEVER expect anyone to come along and pay the bills (which no one ever has). Even if someone did, from past relationships I’m cynical enough never to trust a “Hey, baby, I’ll take care of you. I love you. Trust me.”

    I may be proven wrong on this, but I do believe the Bourdains lived their separate lives while sharing the same space, to give Tony a home base and Ariane a sense that she had both parents, until he fell under the thrall of that she-devil AA and decided he needed the mindless passion she offered. Middle-age crisis, probably.

    Just as he made no move to divorce Nancy until Ottavia was well into her pregnancy, he made no move to divorce Ottavia — ever. Sort of brings to mind Henry VIII. Unless there was a piece he was hot to marry and bear an heir, he left well enough alone.

    PLUS, Tony probably had no desire to have his daughter become the child of divorce, forced to choose between her parents as to where she spent her time. Better for all to get along and continue to be the long-distance family they always had been.

    Yes, because of his work, it was weird, but it worked for them for many years until he met AA. She was insecure enough to demand he renounce his family and proclaim to the world that she was his girlfriend, so that at any point she could turn on him for whatever she thought she might gain from it.

    But he called her bluff. And the rest of us are left hating that he did because he still had so much to contribute if only he’d been able to kick AA the way he kicked heroin.

  158. catsworking says:

    Bunny, I saw Drugstore Cowboy for the first time last night. Thoughts on that to come.

    The stupid theme to Parts Unknown keeps popping into my head, and I HATE HATE HATE that type of music.

  159. Adele Prass says:

    Karen, Tony’s ironic gift from beyond the urn May be to turn you into a punk rocker.

  160. Lynn says:

    Oh I wasn’t suggesting a man has ever supported me. I save and invest like crazy. I just meant that if a wealthy man wanted to buy me property, no strings, just bc he was sooo smitten (as AB did for AA apparently), I’d let him. I’d also make sure it was put entirely in my name, not his. I know women who are letting deadbeat men mooch off them. The other way around is far smarter.

    And I just have to say, I’ve never understood this “Let the man now rest in peace” stuff. He was at peace the second he died. Our discussing AB or not, or what we are saying, is not in any way disturbing him or his ‘rest’. This phrase evokes images of the dead person somehow being unable to ‘sleep’ because of all the unpleasant chatter. Silly. People who are dead aren’t resting. Resting is for the living.

    I also don’t buy the whole ‘don’t speak ill of the dead’ thing. If someone was an asshole in life, I would have no problem saying so after they’re gone (pssst, I’m talking to you, Hugo arm candy). Ditto the orange traitor piece of garbage in the White House.

  161. Daisy says:

    Great commentary ladies. I was reading Bruce’s blog, I think it’s the first entry after AB died and I was surprised that he didn’t seem to praise either wife as being good matches for him. At least that was the feeling i got from the article.

    I read conflicting reports about whether Ottavia was with the new man before or after their seperation. I do remember reading an interview with AB where he said about his marriage to Ottavia, I thought I was marrying Sophia Loren and got Jean Claude Van Damme instead. Of course, he said it in jest, but we all know there is often some truth in jokes.

    I think at the end he just felt tired and drained. The failed marriages, constant travel, feeling disconnected and then AAs cheating and departure was just the final straw into despair and giving up. I do believe if the whole thing with AA hadn’t blown up that week he would still be here but who knows if it wouldn’t have happened at a later time. He was definitely in a delicate mental state combined with giving so much power away to another person and you are in a very precarious position.

  162. catsworking says:

    Lynn, nice touch at the end. You really know the way into my heart! 😉

    I’m not sure if it’s a legal, iron-clad thing, but they say it’s impossible to defame the dead. They no longer have a reputation to protect, so have it. (Of course, the family may get upset and come after you, but that’s another matter.)

    I don’t have a problem with the Bourdain discussion continuing here. I still feel there are other shoes to drop before we find closure, and it may take a while.

    When people say things like, “Let the person rest in peace,” I don’t think it has anything to with the dead, but with boredom and a desire to move on. That’s fine. Move on. I may want to stay where I am a bit longer. We’ve become such a transient species, needing something shiny and new every few minutes to grab our attention.

    Lynn, your first paragraph about having the luck to find a wealthy man to lavish stuff on you made me realize that I have NEVER had a man give me anything of significance. Maybe a piece of jewelry worth a few hundred $$, but that’s it.

    And for the record, I was married briefly in my 20s but kept my maiden name. I was a writer, and I didn’t want his name attached to my work, and it was financial protection. He was eyeball deep in debt and tried to hang some of it on me when we split, but because I’d kept everything separate, he got to keep all his bills. Easy peasy.

  163. catsworking says:

    Daisy, he used that Sophia-Jean Claude joke a lot. It didn’t have anything to do with fidelity, but instead the fact that Ottavia started out sort of a girly-girl and transformed into 5′ or so of pure muscle. He used to brag about her having his back if he ever got into a fight.

    I agree that sheer exhaustion had a lot to do with it. He was simply worn out, and AA stomped on his last nerve.

  164. Daisy says:

    Cats, I didn’t think it had to do with fidelity but that he married a soft, feminine woman and ended up with one who was tough as nails. Of course that could just be me reading more into it and he really did mean just what you said that she was strong and fit.

  165. Lynn says:

    When AB said of O following their separation, “she’s an interesting woman,” I took that as not much of a compliment. I kind of agree with Bruce. I was never much of an O fan bc I thought it so odd that she became obsessed with MMA and that’s literally all she did. I get wanting to be a trophy wife who doesn’t work, but it seemed almost pathological to me.

    I think if she’d been married to a more traditional type guy who was home more it would have caused even more problems in the marriage. Maybe she figured well, he’s never home, I need to occupy myself and apparently working was not of any interest to her, so in that way she was kind of like Nancy. And as you all have pointed out, he seemed to take on the interests of his women – drugs, MMA, etc.

    I fully agree if AA was enough to push him to the brink, if not her some other woman down the line would have. Cruelty didn’t seem to be a prerequisite for putting him in a suicidal mood. Exhibit A – his breakup with Nancy. I never read that she was in any way mean or humiliating to him. Just didn’t work out. And he took little solace in the fact that it lasted 20 years.

    There could have been other things going on mentally over his final months that made everything negative in his relationship with AA seem worse to him than it actually was. Kind of like an anorexic who looks in the mirror and sees a distortion of reality – a fat person.

    So I’m wondering, lets say he and AA had simply broken up – no Hugo, no photos, no odd/mean ‘fuck you all’ IG posts. Just a typical breakup. Say, she grew tired of him or got mad and ended the relationship. Would he have still ended his life? I think he may have simply bc he was sooo in love with her and as he said, she made him ‘forget himself’.

  166. Daisy says:

    Lynn, I had the same thoughts about the comment AB made after their seperation. I don’t know much about their relationship, just what I have read but I also thought the obessesion with MMA was a bit much. But like you said maybe she needed something to occupy her time and threw herself into that.

    I think there was a lot going on with AB mentally over his final days. One of the things I see is that he merged so totally in his relationships that he lost himself and when it ended he lost his sense of purpose, and reason for living. That is the issue when we give too much power to another person. They become our reason for living and if it ends we don’t want to go on.

    In the case of AA it was made even worse by the public humiliation and I think he felt she was a “soulmate” and that he had finally met someone he could share with on many levels including his work. In some ways that may have been true as far as film, creativity, work etc. but in the sense of committment and values he was deluding himself to think AA was capable of the kind of committed relationship he wanted.

    What strikes me about AB is that although he was considered an “Alpha Male” and very masculine he also had a very deep, complex emotional nature. In my opinion, it made him all the more attractive.

  167. Mira says:

    Hi,Karen and the gang, still reading your blog, I just felt that my comments rubbed you the wrong way, and that I was given marching orders, and that I am not welcome. Of course I don’t mean we are literally disturbing his restful peace, he has sorted that out for himself.
    It is only human to speculate and wonder why, and I am in no way bored by it.
    As I mentioned earlier, I am dealing with the very recent death of my mother, and have escaped into this death as a death easier to deal with, and immersed myself into the story, playing the detective, reading and comparing timelines of instagram posts of all involved. I did not move onto a ‘new and shiny thing’. I am just trying to survive my grief one day at a time, and not collapse into a heap.
    I did find the idealising of certain people, and assuming him to be the guilty party not right, and instead of saying ‘let him rest in peace’, I really should have said, that the man cannot defend himself anymore. Thank you for the opportunity to share my thoughts.

  168. Morganlf says:

    For a fact he bought Argento the house it’s being reported widely on IG. Several sources are said to be highly reliable but wish to remain unnamed. It has also been revealed he paid quite a bit more for her lifestyle.

    Ottavia worked quite a lot when they started dating and up until ther contractions started. I posted that interview earlier.

    Afterwards she was a stay at home mom with help. Always a kick boxing aficionado she developed an interest in BJJ as a way to get back in shape post baby. While I don’t know what the discussion was between her and Tony, I’m assuming he was fine with her not returning to work.
    When I first met her she was wearing a BITCHIN Chopard watch, a large black Birkin bag (Hermès anywhere from 15 to 65K) and 7 inch Louboutans…
    I believe it was his pleasure to spoil her. He tweeted once that he was returning from a trip and had made a visit to Hermès. It’s hard for me to imagine he even knew of such things.
    Early on when I first saw them 2008, they were very affectionate in public.

    Her training evolved into a vocation, her eventual goal she has stated in many interviews is to teach. I hope she gets there.

    Back to Argento, there is video of her at a block party with Hugo on June 6 posted by a friend of hers, look for the guy in the red shirt you’ll see her and Hugo, soulless empty vessel, hope she was having fun:

    View this post on Instagram

    🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻

    A post shared by angelicadimajo (@angelinaangelin_a) on

  169. I’m not sure if it’s already been mentioned, Do you think Antony’s brother Chris was his financial advisor? I’d like to think he used someone he trusted & who knew how to keeps his accounts safe and private.

  170. gettngclear says:

    Thank!you catsworking for welcoming me about a week ago! My time off from work coincides w this sad drama, so appreciate the discussion here. One thought I’ve had is that no one can really know the dynamics inside of a relationship other than the two ppl. I don’t have any personal connection to any of the people in this story. One thing that I’ve wondered is whether it may have been painful for the woman involved to have marriage off the table. I can imagine feeling hurt and angry and eventually walking away. Might be even more painful if it’s a public relationship. Just wanted to share this since I’ve not seen this brought up.

  171. Lenora says:

    Mira,
    Sorry for the loss of your mother. My mother has been gone for 20 years. We were very close. I still miss her. I found comfort in knowing we were close and had a strong bond. I completely understand how focusing on a death you are emotional removed from could be a welcomed distraction. It’s so very cliche but time does heal.

  172. L Villeneuve says:

    If AA wants the “truth” then why just would she not just lay it out.. I think only she and Eric really knows what happened and they have both been mum.

  173. Bunny says:

    Catsworking

    You don’t like the Parts Unknown theme? Aw I love the theme they did for his show, and when CNN did that remembering AB and played the theme at the end after AB says “time to say goodbye to an old friend” I almost teared up, but that’s just me haha

  174. Daisy says:

    Morgan, I wonder if one of the reasons he bought the house for her was with the hope that they would eventually live together there. I do remember him saying in one of the articles that it wouldn’t be terrible if he and AA lived together or something like that.

    Gettngclear, I agree, it’s hard to know what really went on in the relationships and we are just speculating. I have no idea if it was painful for AA to have marriage off the table but I am not so sure it was off the table. If they stayed together he may have relented. In fact, there is a strong possibility that under the right circumstances he would have married her to “secure” the relationship.

    Also, with everything we know about AA and her history with men I doubt she cheated and walked away because of things being too “painful” for her. In fact, she said after he died they had an open relationship and loved without borders, or something to that effect.

    Who knows what was said between them leading up to all this and maybe he did agree to her seeing others. She really wasn’t very discreet with Hugo, parading around the streets of Rome. I think it’s probally more accurate to say she just did what she wanted whether AB knew or not and hoped she didn’t get caught since it would jeopardize her getting money, support, connections etc.from him. But if she did get caught then I could see her saying well your still married and use that as the excuse to give her the freedom to see other men.

  175. Mira says:

    Thank you Lenora, for your kind words. We were very close, and she was my confidante. I could count on her in whatever dire straits I ended up. I’ll try and take comfort in the fact that I was extremely lucky that I had her for so many years, and that she brought joy and sunshine to all who met her. I wish I were half a woman that she was.
    I miss her terribly.
    Hence maybe my overly sentimental posts, but AB’s story is just too close to home, in more than one way.

  176. Lynn says:

    I think she wanted to get caught. I think they had fought, maybe gone through another of their many breakups, and she wanted to anger, hurt him, make him jealous. Get some sort of rise out of him. I know the type. AA fits it perfectly. There are shots of her with Hugh where she is looking into the camera like, “yea take that, fucker.” Think about it – she’s infamous in Italy. She knew she’d be photographed. She was in no way trying to be careful or discreet.

    One thing that doesn’t make sense – if it was indeed an open relationship, why didn’t we see/hear about her with any other men the entire 2 years they dated until Hugo?

  177. Daisy says:

    Lynn, I think your spot on. It makes sense that she was trying to piss him off and make him jealous. What better way to do that then parading around Rome with a young, attractive guy on her arm.

    I doubt it was an open relationship. I think she just said that to do damage control after his death because those pictures where so damning. It’s very possible they broke up that week and she was free to date others but in that letter she made it sound like it was always an open relationship.

  178. catsworking says:

    Bunny, it’s not that I don’t like the Parts Unknown theme. I don’t like that type of music in general. If Sinatra was singing it, yeah. I’m totally a throwback to the pre-rock era.

  179. catsworking says:

    Mira, you are certainly never unwelcome here. From your last post, I got the message that you thought we should all just shut down and move on. Since I’ve been covering Bourdain for over a decade, that wasn’t going to happen in my case. I’m seeing this story through to the end, whatever the end is.

    I’m very sorry for your own loss and apologize for any old wounds the discussion here may have opened.

  180. catsworking says:

    So, Tony buys her a house and says, “It’s yours, honey. Bring home whatever you drag in off the streets and fuck his brains out in ‘our’ bed and that’s OK. We have an open relationship. We’re like birds. I just pay all your expenses.” Yeah, right.

    They were photographed together at the end of the Firenze (Florence) shoot that we may never see because he probably didn’t have time to do the voiceover. She was there. We don’t know how involved she was, but it was Italy and he probably gave her screen time to further her career (such as it is). In the photo she’s sitting with her leg up and a cigarette in her hand, looking bored, as always. He looks tired. You’ve seen it.

    So what happened between Florence and France that pissed her off so much that she had to cuckold him and throw it in his face like an ape flinging feces? THAT’S what we don’t know.

    Wasn’t the house grand enough for her? Was he supposed to make her an international sensation overnight the way Weinstein never could, given that she was an ugly, sexually dysfunctional freakazoid with a nonexistent work ethic? How did Tony fail her (in her twisted mind)?

    I pray she writes a book before she offs herself, which she seems destined to do. I just want to see how she tries to justify her unconscionably coarse, crude, traitorous behavior toward him. Tony’s fans have her number, and it’s way less than ZERO. If she ever aspired to become a big star in the U.S., she can kiss that fantasy buh-bye. Aging sex kittens covered with tasteless tats don’t tend to do well here.

  181. Lynn says:

    “So, Tony buys her a house and says, “It’s yours, honey. Bring home whatever you drag in off the streets and fuck his brains out in ‘our’ bed and that’s OK. We have an open relationship. We’re like birds. I just pay all your expenses.” Yeah, right.”

    “like an ape flinging feces”

    Karen, I’m dying. That’s hilarious lolol. To answer your question about what happened between Florence and France:

    Theory 1: He wasn’t paying enough ‘attention’ to her, attention being defined by her warped, twisted sense of the word.

    Theory 2. Her issues kicked in. The whole why does this man want ME, thing. Does he REALLY want me? And just how bad? I’m bored. I need to ‘test’ his love. I need to see passion, anger. Oh I know, I’ll fuck other men and get photographed all over Rome with one. Normally I feel sorry for people like this because they can’t ever truly accept another person’s love and are doomed to constant drama and ruined relationships. But since it’s her, nah.

    Theory 3: She wasn’t even angry at him. She’s just so unsympathetic, narcissistic and callous as a person that to her this is normal. Get bored, get tired of the man once she’s reeled him in, lose respect for him once he falls for her and she knows she has ‘won’, and move on to the next. Kind of like a mosquito. There is no fury when she bites you, she’s just doing what she does naturally. If you happen to get malaria or some other horrid malady, that isn’t her concern.

  182. Lenora says:

    Lynn, I think you need a theory 4: all of the above.

    I still wonder if AA called the paps herself to get back at Tony. I also had a theory that what set this whole nightmare in motion was AB wanted Asia to come to France while he was filming. The week before Bourdain died he was very happy and so pleased with the Hong Kong episode which was airing that weekend. Maybe he wanted to watch the show together. A viewing party. I imagine AB thought of her as his muse and thought he finally had a mate who was a collaborator. He wouldn’t be so lonely while pursuing his passion of food and travel. Asia declined the invite with a lie about spending time with her children or prepping for Italian XFactor, which must be insane and I wonder if it involves stripper contortionists etc. Then the photographs of her and the frenchy boy toy are published and goes down hill from there.

    Last week we went to dinner at a little restaurant on Long Island. Their menu represents the background of the couple, south east Asian and Italian/European. You could tell they have sunk every last nickel into the adventure and spending all their free time there. They have interesting wine list and live music on weekends. After a little wine I thought of Tony and how he would have really enjoyed this young couple’s passion and desire to bring the world a little closer with food.

  183. ABisWithUs says:

    Karen, you’re doing a great job!!! Thank you again.

  184. catsworking says:

    Lynn, all of your theories are plausible. The one thing AA needed from Tony was a steady influx of cash since she wasn’t exactly busting her balls to find work. OK, she got that gig on X Factor, probably due to her association with him.

    I think her ego trumped (god, I hate using that word now in its original context) her practical side. She just had to squash him like a bug under her heel. To show what a bad-ass woman she is. No man controls her (unless she needs his money).

    Once she’s unemployed again and at loose ends, with no wealthy sugar daddy to support her, it will be a pleasure watching her self-destruct. She miscalculated bigly in turning on Ronan Farrow, who, as Woody Allen’s only son and witness to whatever was going on there, is SUCH a sympathetic figure here, she’ll never get the American public on her side.

    And without the American public, she’ll never be more than a D-list low-budget European horror film cartoon character nobody will remember except as the promiscuous tramp who killed Bourdain.

  185. catsworking says:

    Lenora, I think your Theory 4 is spot on. A flight from Italy to France must have been a short, cheap hop AA could have taken so they could spend another week together, yet she didn’t do it. And not even after he died when she could have tried to assert herself as “next of kin.”

    That was very telling. She knew she had no place inserting herself into the tragedy. Or maybe she didn’t want to face Eric and the crew, who knew what she’d been doing to Tony by phone on that shoot.

    Since she seems to have no regard for her children (or has a live-in who raises them in her absence — who pays for that, I wonder? — or maybe her 17-year-old runs the household now since mom is obviously incapable), AA had the freedom to hop on a plane and follow Tony wherever, which is something Ottavia lost when she found her own life and Ariane started school.

    Tony may have been envisioning a woman who could share the places he went, like Ottavia could do in the beginning. But instead, AA chose to hook up with other men and generate photographic proof to throw in his face. Maybe she thought it would make him try even harder to be more devoted to her. Joke was on her. Had she paid a bit more attention to him, she’d have known he had a tendency to walk away from assholes.

    PS: That restaurant on Long Island sounds so cute and cozy!

  186. Bunny says:

    Catsworking

    Oh ok I see, well Sinatra could sing anything and make it sound good haha

  187. Anita says:

    Karen, I agree. The fact AA didn’t fly to France immediately when they found AB dead says it all. She really didn’t give one f*ck. And XFactor would certainly have held the show for her for one day.

    I also thought maybe AA was pushing marriage or a child and AB said “no” so she did the “I will show you how hot I am” with Hugo.
    It could have been very calculating on her part. Or not.

    Watched the Brazil episode with Ottavia tonight. AB looked so healthy and happy and I loved how he called her “baby”. I don’t remember seeing that show in 2012 but that was a very stressful time for me. Did watch it without tears, so I’m healing. But I am still pissed.

  188. Randi says:

    Just a thought… Tony and AA might have had a big fight before he started filming in France, and he didn’t want her there. In fact, he may have finally found out what kind a person she was and dumped her. That would surely have pi$$ed her off, and the reason she wanted to take revenge with Hugo.
    I hope someone knows the truth. There must be something on his phone or laptop – unless he deleted it all.

  189. catsworking says:

    Anita, Tony was found on a Friday morning, so Asia had the whole weekend “free.” I may be wrong, but my understanding from what I read was that she didn’t begin filming on X Factor until Tuesday or Wednesday the following week — in FRANCE.

    Randi, I think justicefortony said that they had been fighting and breaking up periodically. But she’d recently been with him on a shoot in Florence, and they took that B&W pic when it wrapped, sitting on a bench. He looks tired, she looks bored yet sly. So, they were still an item in Florence. Maybe somebody has a date for when that was. I’m guessing he may have gone straight from Florence to France since he was already over there. She returned to Italy.

  190. L Villeneuve says:

    I wonder if AA has dumped her boy toy yet. No photos showing up of the two of them together after Tony’s death. Seems rather strange.

  191. Lenora says:

    Catsworking, I certainly not sure if this accurate but based on some online comments AA went that Saturday to a tapping of Italian X-Factor. The paps caught her leaving her home and captioned the photographs that AA was going to ABs funeral (which we now know is 100% inaccurate) but in the reality it was something to do with X Factor. That Saturday was the first time AA was seen publicly after Tony’s suicide. The grieving soul mate had to get to Italian X-Factor the pinnacle of art.

  192. catsworking says:

    LV, if I were Hugo, I wouldn’t want to be seen within 1,000 feet of AA.

    Lenora, I saw those photos of AA getting into a car (with her daughter?) and the caption saying she was off to the funeral, when Tony’s body was still lying in the French morgue with no instructions. I don’t think she was going to anything with X Factor, because there was reporting when she went back to work, and it wasn’t the next day.

    https://pagesix.com/2018/06/19/asia-argento-back-at-work-after-anthony-bourdain-suicide/

    Here’s a hoot I just found searching for the link above. Argento already HAS done Dancing with the Stars, the Italian version in 2016.

    https://variety.com/2018/music/global/asia-argento-returns-to-italian-tv-as-x-factor-judge-1202826402/

  193. catsworking says:

    FOUND SOMETHING: AA on Dancing with the Stars Italy, 2016, season 11

    A few scenes of her doing not much on the dance floor. Probably the highlights.

  194. Lenora says:

    LOL What a shitty dancer. Basically she didn’t practice at all.

  195. catsworking says:

    Lenora, couldn’t agree more. I studied ballroom heavily for 7 years, and what I see in her clips is rank beginner. She didn’t practice. She was stiff, with the most elementary choreography. It was just another gig for the money, and she did as little of the work as she could.

    It looked like she was beligerent and mouthing off to the judges a lot (maybe an Italian speaker can fill us in). I haven’t been able to find how soon she got kicked off, although I know she didn’t win. From the dances shown, she lasted several weeks. The Italian version seems decidedly more low budget than the U.S., if her cheap costumes are any indication Maybe they couldn’t justify investing much into her since she was clearly not into winning.

    And I wonder why we haven’t seen pics of her performances on her social media?

  196. Lynn says:

    LMAO oh man those tats. It’s like putting a gown on a pig. How did AB get such horrible taste in women? Seriously what male in his right mind looks at that and drools? Throw up in his mouth a little is more like it!

  197. Lenora says:

    Cat, I am sure in Italy like in the US, if you can bring drama to a reality show you extend your shelf life. So staying longer certainly isn’t a guarantee of talent.

    Lynn, On a certain level Tony’s insecurities may have played a role?Maybe he felt AA was the best he could do? Some men are drawn to the crazy like moths to a flame.

  198. L Villeneuve says:

    It’s only been a month… but it feels like yesterday. Still missing him.

  199. Adele Prass says:

    I’ve been amazed by the people, who’ve been touched by Tony’s death. An artist friend of mine created a piece in his honor; friends of mine keep sayin, “I wonder what Anthony Bourdain would say about . . .,” and last night I was at the drugstore, asking about the People Magazine issue that I never got, and the clerk started talking about how great he was and how much she’d learned from him. Tony touched so many. I’ll miss him always.

  200. catsworking says:

    LV, I’ve realized in just the past few days that Tony is no longer my first thought when I wake up in the morning. But neither is Trump! So that’s progress.

    But I still do think of Tony many times throughout every day, remember that he’s gone silent, and I grieve a little more.

    Adele, since you were one of the “originals” here when I was the only blogger covering Bourdain regularly, you share my amazement at how we went from him and Ottavia personally monitoring what we were saying about him, to him becoming a household name known by just about everyone on the planet. What we DIDN’T know was the overwhelmingly positive impact he was having on so many people.

    The loss of Bourdain’s voice is beyond devastating, particularly now, when we have Trump overseas bashing and bullying all our European allies in the coarsest, most ignorant possible way (while General Kelly sits there smiling with approval) before he goes off to file his progress report and kiss the ring of his master, Putin.

    When he gets to England on Thursday, I hope the British people are in his face with sheer disgust every minute he’s there, even in the remote locations he’s being shuttled to avoid seeing how much Londoners despise him. The Angry Orange Baby Trump blimp over London will be a nice touch.

    Lynn, I laughed at “putting a gown on a pig.” Actually, a pig would pull off the look better. Every time I see AA’s bare skin smeared with all that black scribbling, I get the icks.

  201. Lenora says:

    I absolutely believe Bourdain would be surprised over the outpouring of grief over his death. I suppose if he really deep down knew how much people deeply appreciated his perspective he would have never committed suicide. In many ways Tony was CNN best correspondent. He just had such an unique perspective. I’ve been trying to pay homage to Tony by trying local restaurants that in my mind he would enjoy. This week is Pine Aire Seafood. The restaurant is famous for its El Salvadoran seafood stew. Furthermore, Pine Aire is in the neighborhood that Trump and his evil Kebler elf Sessions have been using as a backdrop for their MS-13 propaganda during trips to Long Island in order to justify their racist anti-immigrant agenda. So I am going to eat seafood stew, honor Tony and think, “F@#$% U Trump.”

  202. Lynn says:

    That orange baby blimp is brilliant! It makes me LOL every time I see it, especially from the back. That phone, those tiny hands, that big diapered ass. One trump cultist said it’s ‘the most disrespectful display to a sitting US president ever’. I certainly hope so. The fucker couldn’t even manage to select a woman for SCOTUS.

    HAHA I see the toxic twat has put up a new IG photo of her all sweaty in a boxing ring (puke) and has re-enabled comments, which continue to call her out for the truth she is hiding. How addicted must she be to attention to continue enabling comments? It’s like she can’t help herself. Maybe she’s such a masochist she gets off on the insults. IG user Caramelleacid is doing a particularly good job at eviscerating her:

    “are you going to come out and explain why you had @rosemcgowan lie about your relationship with Tony? How are you and Hugo these days anyway?”

    “poor Asia, denied the abuse of @coreyfeldman, signed a petition to free a pedophile, and cheated on her boyfriend shortly before he committed suicide. poor Asia! ignore these trolls and keep doing the shitty things you do girl! ”

    Damn I didn’t know she signed a petition in support of child rapist Polanski. Hypocrite, much?

    https://www.instagram.com/caramelle.acide/?hl=en

  203. catsworking says:

    Lynn, in a boxing ring, of all places? What, she’s trying to get up in Ottavia’s grill now? Ottavia could undoubtedly snap her neck like a twig — and enjoy doing it.

    Lenora, if he weren’t so bone-weary, I do think Bourdain would have taken comfort in knowing how much he was needed — if only there had been a way to convey it to him. Unfortunately, he seemed to be living in a bubble during his last days and couldn’t see beyond it. LOVE that you’re branching out with cuisine for Tony. There’s a new Thai restaurant right down the street from me that I’ve been meaning to hit as an homage.

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