Anthony Bourdain’s Death: What We Know So Far

By Karen

In case you’ve been under a rock the past week or so, on Friday morning, June 8, in Le Chambard Hotel in the town of Kayersburg, in Strasbourg, France, while on a shoot for Parts Unknown, Eric Ripert found Anthony Bourdain hanging from the belt of his hotel-supplied bathrobe in the bathroom of his room.

Bourdain’s body was transported to nearby Colmar, where it remained for five days, the typical time to complete French formalities in such situations.

The authorities almost immediately ruled it a suicide, but took urine and blood for a toxicology report.

By Tuesday, June 12, Eric Ripert seemed to be back in New York because he tweeted a landmark there.

On Wednesday, June 13, Bourdain’s body was cremated. He was to be returned to the U.S. on Friday, June 15. This is where the story stops.

But backing up a bit…

On Tuesday, June 5, photos of Bourdain’s girlfriend, Asia Argento, 42, were published online, showing her in Rome on Monday, behaving overly friendly with 28-year-old French reporter Hugo Clement. Hugo had apparently accompanied Asia to the Cannes Film Festival, where on May 19, she took the stage and denounced the festival as Harvey Weinstein’s “hunting ground.”

Bourdain had publicly praised Argento’s courage at Cannes.

More photos of Argento and Hugo dancing and flirting in a restaurant were published by another paparazzi in a restaurant sometime over the weekend immediately prior. This was the same weekend the Hong Kong episode of Parts Unknown, which Bourdain had hired Argento to direct and he considered the pinnacle of his career, was aired in the U.S.

On June 8, three hours before Bourdain’s death was announced, Argento posted a photo of herself on Instagram wearing a T-shirt that said “Fuck Everyone,” with the caption, “You know who you are.” She later deleted it.

Bourdain was not yet divorced from Ottavia, so she is next of kin and Bourdain’s mother Gladys said Ottavia is in charge of all further arrangements.

Now, here’s what we don’t know…

Did Bourdain, a prolific and constant writer, leave a note or anything explaining his mental state?

Who last saw him alive? When was that? What was his demeanor? Did he say anything?

What was the exact time of death? He missed dinner Thursday night and breakfast Friday morning before he was found. That’s a large window of time when it could have happened.

Will results of the toxicology report ever be released?

Was there any communication between him and Argento from June 5 when her photos surfaced and June 8, when he was pronounced dead?

What became of his electronic devices that would most likely have those answers: phone, iPad, laptop? Last we knew of them, they were in a safe in France.

Did he ashes arrive safely back in New York?

Has there been a private funeral?

Will there be a public memorial?

Argento has posted photos and cryptic messages on Instagram, and authorized a bizarre rant in her defense by Rose McGowan. Will those two go any further to claim attention for themselves to capitalize on this tragedy?

AND: Remember the West Virginia episode that opened season 11 of Parts Unknown? Apparently, Bourdain borrowed a miner’s lunch pail for some shooting and forgot it in the mine. That family will never forget Tony. Here’s what happened.

137 Responses to Anthony Bourdain’s Death: What We Know So Far

  1. izzy1957 says:

    Interesting thread that someone’s taken a lot of time to put together for the timeline of Bourdain’s death and “what we know”

  2. Donna Pavone says:

    I have been to Colmar,it’s beautiful

  3. catsworking says:

    izzy, I agree that link is the definitive thread, which was posted on Twitter a few days ago. I didn’t look at it when doing my post, but just pulled together what I remember from what we’ve gathered here to keep the record straight for Cats Working. So much gets buried in the comments and falls to the bottom.

  4. catsworking says:

    Tony and Eric had meal there. It may have been the one where Tony posted that big plate of meat on Instagram, his last post, and now the restaurant is a tourist attraction. The table was by a window.

    The town where they were staying looked lovely as well. When I read that he was in a “luxury” hotel, I was picturing a Marriott behemoth or something. But then I saw a picture of the hotel and the little street it’s on and thought, the staff must be absolutely devastated to have something so notorious happen in their midst. It will haunt them every time they go into that room.

    I’ve never been to the French countryside, but would like to one day.

  5. iwonder says:

    Comments on Asia’s latest instagram post:

    From justicefortony:
    Which truth? The truck that you taunted Tony for the 2 days prior to his death? The truth that he had to stop production multiple times to take your angry phone calls? The truth that you are a con artist and used him for money since day one? Yes the truth will prevail. Just wait.

    Response from mushroomgeek to justicefortony:
    yes I live in NY and I heard from people that work at CNN the same story a few days ago… ugh…
    I live in NY a couple blocks away from Bourdain family and without being specific, I am surrounded with people that work in radio and TV… New York might be big but we all know our neighbors and our hood… it is not uncommon to find out things before news / tabloids… we just ask neighbors.

  6. iwonder says:

    God, auto correct, ugh. See above:
    From justicefortony:
    Which truth? The truth that you taunted Tony for the 2 days prior to his death?
    Not truck.

  7. Laura N. says:

    He was stopping production to take her angry calls? Wow. I wonder where that info came from.

  8. Lynn says:

    “The truth that he had to stop production multiple times to take your angry phone calls?”

    ha! This is what I was saying earlier. She totally seems the type to drama queen it up, make insane demands, get hysterical, throw things, threaten suicide and make those angry calls…what a whack job. And when he had not sufficiently to her satisfaction placated her hysterics, she ‘got even’ by flaunting her thing with Hugh. She probably finds these kind of antics in a relationship a turn-on. And, well she IS Italian.

    Perhaps he dumped HER, not vice versa. Perhaps he couldn’t take the insanity anymore and said enough, hoping to reconcile when she calmed down, she ‘got even’ with the Hugh cavorting, and the rest is history.

  9. feijicha says:

    what a C…….

  10. iwonder says:

    More info:

    justicefortony comments:
    I’m very close to someone who was on the shoot with him.

    everyone was worried and checked on him all day and night on Wednesday. He had been fighting with Asia since the pictures came out. On Thursday he seemed to be doing better. He fought with her many many times before so on one expected him to kill himself this time. Everyone just hoped they would stay broken up for good. No one is talking to the press out of respect for his family. Ashes arrived last week.

    She’s been harassing people at CNN non stop, but no one would touch her with a 10-foot pole. Everyone knows what she did. She’s persona non grata. She should be happy no one is talking to the press about her. They are just hoping she’ll go away. if she doesn’t then someone will have to say something.

    mushroomgeek comment (in response to someone saying they hope she is not allowed to attend the funeral:
    yes she was not at the funeral

  11. iwonder says:

    the truth will come out and it’s really really ugly. She doesn’t deserve a gig on @xfactoritalia. They should fire her now before it’s too late.

    Ottavia liked mushroomgeek’s most recent post on instagram, so there is definitely a connection. (See above for mushroomgeek’s comments and information provided.)

    I have all of the screenshots.

  12. Adele Prass says:

    Iwonder, so there was a funeral? And Tony and Asia fought a lot?

    To torture myself, I watched the Parts Unknown Rome episode, where Tony and Asia supposedly first met. I found most jarring the conversation, where Asia said she had never voted and that being concerned about her family and her neighborhood was enough. She sounded so nihilistic and so not like Tony, who we know, was passionately concerned about many world issues. All week i’ve wanted to hear his voice about the separation of families at our borders. We still need his voice.

    And speaking of nihilism, I also rewatched the Parts Unknown Berlin episode. It was very dark, and I thought an I’ll-conceived nod to the Weimar Republic (a period, about which, as a history buff, I know a fair bit). It occurred to me that Asia spends a lot of time in Berlin, and we might have her to thank for the darkness.

  13. Bacardi1/Bonnie C. says:

    I wish I could remember where I read it, but one account supplied by the hotel management stated that when Tony missed both dinner & then breakfast with Eric, management sent a receptionist up to his room & that she found him & then returned to get everyone else. But there’s no other account of it told that way, so perhaps Eric went with the receptionist & she just unlocked the door for him?

  14. iwonder says:

    Based on mushroomgeek’s proven connection to Ottavia, if she says the funeral has occurred and that Asia did not attend, I believe her.

    The recount of them fighting comes from a new account – justicefortony – an account that has no posts, connections or history on instagram. But, I believe what they say, simply based on my own instinct from the statements made and from what has already been discovered and I think this is a genuine person who is in small way trying to get the truth out there.

  15. L Villeneuve says:

    Finally we are getting some answers. Thank you justicefortony and mushroomgeek!!!

  16. catsworking says:

    Bacardi, my memory is that Eric went to Tony’s room with the receptionist. I should think they would let his traveling companion enter first. They’d seen them having meals together all week and must have known who they were. Maybe one day Eric will tell us what happened. Or maybe not.

  17. Bacardi1/Bonnie C. says:

    That makes more sense. Thanks!

  18. catsworking says:

    I’m going to sum up my reaction to all the comments posted here. THANK YOU SO MUCH!! Upon reading that there HAS been a funeral and Asia was NOT there, I feel a great relief.

    If it’s true that Asia was stalking him by phone during the final shoot, then she’s far sicker then I could have possibly imagined. She did tell the photographer in the restaurant that posting the photos of her with Hugo would “ruin” her, and he said she looked as if she was making up her mind about what to do with Hugo as they provocatively danced together.

    We know she decided to spend the weekend with him in the same hotel she shared with Bourdain, and then let herself be captured on the street Monday looking every bit like Hugo’s lover.

    So… she must have been trying to get Tony to disbelieve what his eyes had seen because she didn’t want the gravy train to stop. Why didn’t he just turn off his phone?

    Seems weird that she’s now hounding people at CNN but, if true, it explains all the silence from those close to him. I feel sorry for everyone connected to all of this, and my heart goes out to Ottavia and Ariane. Not only do they have to cope with their loss, but knowing that this insatiable, publicity-hungry she-devil is still trying to capitalize on it.

    Ottavia probably has all his electronics and knows exactly how it played out if texts were exchanged. Without a doubt, she’s got Asia’s number, figuratively and literally.

  19. catsworking says:

    Adele, I think Tony was in a dark place knowing that his marriage was falling apart, and Asia stepped right into it and led him down her rabbit hole. After watching the Naxos episode again, where they really played up his solitude and sense of loneliness (this was summer 2015, he wasn’t wearing his ring), I suspect he was reliving all his failed relationships. I wrote the quote down, but it’s not near me at the moment. He mused on whether it was worth it to be in a beautiful place with no one to share it with.

    And, actually, Naxos would have been a perfect spot for him to bring Ottavia and Ariane over for a vacay and happy family episode, and it probably would have happened in the earlier days of their marriage.

    When I watch him in these gorgeous locales, eating delicious food, talking to interesting local people, feeling that all’s well, I can’t help wondering if it never crossed his mind in his last moments that he was giving it all up forever.

  20. Daisy says:

    Thanks for the updated post Cats. I am confused. Was a private memorial service held in France already? If so, who was there? I would hate to think he was all alone.

    iwonder great work on finding the justice for Tony. I am not one bit surprised she was causing havoc on the set while he was working. Drama queen 24/7. He had his hands full all along as I thought. Typical behavior of personality disorders. No regard for your life, it’s all about catering to their insatiable need for attention. WHo cares if your working, you will stop and listen to my diatribe. Nothing is more important than you catering to their emotional outbursts! So typical. I am sure there will be lots more of this selfish, wacky behavior revealed from his work crew.

  21. catsworking says:

    iwonder, I wonder if justicefortony is Sandra Ripert, Eric’s wife. This is pure speculation on my part, but she introduced Ottavia and Tony, they’re very close friends, and she would want to see justice served. Eric could have filled her in on Asia’s antics while Tony was filming, and he may be keeping in touch with the ZPZ crew and hear what’s happening at CNN.

  22. catsworking says:

    Daisy, there was no service in France. Since Eric returned to New York Monday or Tuesday, and Ottavia was seen returning to her apartment on Wednesday, the day Tony was cremated, I’m assuming no one accompanied his ashes home. The ZPZ crew would probably have had other work commitments and returned after they wrapped up the details of the aborted episode.

    As I’ve said all along, we’ve only seen the tip of this story. Once everyone gains some distance, I think facts will start to trickle out.

    I’m still waking up every morning with my first thought being, “Tony’s gone!”

    Sorry, Trump. (She says with heavy sarcasm.)

  23. Look at Justicefortony instagram account. He posted 2 hours ago . Wow. Holy Shit Asia is 100 fucking percent trouble.

  24. catsworking says:

    Welcome, jackie! If Ottavia liked something justicefortony posted (as someone here said previously), that means she’s aware and approves. It would appear she’s allowing someone to put some truth out there in the face of Asia’s stream of self-serving BS because it would be unseemly for Ottavia to get down in the mud and wrestle that pig. Ottavia would win hands-down, of course. But Ottavia has the class and self-control not to engage directly.

  25. Thank you for the welcome. I have been reading everything here since the 8th and it’s really helping me . Asia blocked justicefortony and a few others in the night so he posted on his on page about her. I tried to screenshot what they wrote but cant get it to work. If any here can that would be awesome. They talk about her being drunk all the time and Tony firing a long time cinematographer for disagreeing w Asia.

  26. catsworking says:

    WHAT??!! His cinematographers were winning Emmys. If he fired one over Asia, that’s absolute outrageous. They were a tight-knit group. (I hope ZPZ has hired that person back by now.)

    I have no doubt, now that Bourdain is no longer around to do it, somebody will eventually write the firsthand behind-the-scenes story of shooting No Reservations and Parts Unknown, and it’s going to be a doozy.

  27. catsworking says:

    justicefortony on IG just answered one important question I posed here. He (she?) wrote:

    “By Thursday he seemed to be better and kind of wanted everyone to back off. As I said before, this is not the first time they broke up so although everyone was very vigilant during the day, no one checked on him at night because he was acting fine before heading to his room. No one could imagine what he was going to do. Everyone was just really hoping they would not get back together this time.”

  28. izzy1957 says:

    Is it possible to link to both the justicefortony and mushroomgeek instagram accounts on here? I can’t find either one. I mean to say, I think I’ve found those names on Instagram, but don’t see any posts or stories with those comments mentioned.

    What am I doing wrong? Familiar with Twitter. Instagram, not so much, though I do have an Instagram account, but I’ve never posted on it.

    Thanks for any help.

  29. catsworking says:

    If that’s possible, I have no idea how to do it. I found justicefortony with a search. The first one, #justicefortony, wasn’t it. It was just: justicefortony. Didn’t try mushroomgeek.

    But I just posted a comment to justice inviting anyone there to come here if they have some facts to add. It seems everyone is blocking each other over there and IG may be canceling accounts.

    I’m OK with Twitter, but Instagram and Facebook and LinkedIn, fuggedabouddit.

  30. izzy1957 says:

    Found it thank you, Karen! And, I did have the right mushroomgeek account.

  31. Ottavia just followed me on instagram. This means that every thing Justicefortony has said is true, as I’m sure thats where she saw my name.

  32. Adele Prass says:

    Help! Had no trouble finding justicefortony, but can’r Seem to find the right mushroomgeek — just pictures of fungi. Oh, and Ottavia started following me on IG.

  33. izzy1957 says:

    Yeah, that’s the right account Adele. It’s just that she doesn’t have anything about Anthony on her own Instagram account, but it is her who has posted on the justicefortony instagram account, which seems to be another new account based on comments that different instagram accounts and such are being reported, blocked and removed, indicating this is another new account (the justicefortony instagram account with just a black screen) to keep the real truth out there, and so it’s up for the moment, but subject to possibly being reported in some fashion again and being removed. That’s my take on it, anyway.

    It’s getting sadder to read the apparent hold she had on him, and now we better know and can try and understand the tragic outcome. I’m glad to know that people tried their best to support Anthony while all this horrible shit was going down, and obviously no one could be with him 24/7. They thought he was doing/coping better, and hoped she would remain history, and of course were stunned like the rest of the world when he was found.
    😦 😦

  34. Lynn says:

    Wow looks like many of Asia’s cult are now pummeling and threatening mushroomgeek. And I see that mushroom is posting frequently that people should follow justicefortony who ‘got blocked for knowing too much’. Not a stretch to think mushroom and justice may know each other.

    BUT when I clicked on justicefortony I get to a blank page with no photos or text, just the name ‘justicefortony’ at the top and stats saying 1 post, 42 followers. I don’t remember my login info for IG so if anyone can screenshot or copy paste what JFT is saying pls do. I can only see what JFT has said in the comments section of Asia’s posts before she blocked him/her.

    A funeral has happened? So a major celeb has had a funeral and the media doesn’t report it?? No photos/video from attendees going in/coming out? What, did they have it in someone’s apartment? This makes no sense.

  35. catsworking says:

    jackie, please keep us posted. We totally respect Ottavia’s privacy, but if she decides to say anything, we’d like to hear it.

  36. catsworking says:

    Adele, I had the same mushroom dilemma with mushroomgeek and gave up. It appears IG lets people use the same or similar names.

    It appears that Ottavia is reaching out a bit to her old friends. Please make sure she knows we’ve got her back and wish her only the best.

  37. izzy1957 says:

    I’ve already took screen shots of everything there, Karen.

  38. catsworking says:

    Lynn, I clicked on that black square and it showed likes and posts. Clicked on the posts, I think, and got to the comments.

    The black box just means no photo, I guess, but there’s content there anyway.

    As for the funeral being kept under wraps, seeing the backstory on Asia, I can totally understand why the family wanted no one to know. Best not to take any chance of that crazy bitch showing up — or sending Rose.

    I did just see a video of a woman laying flowers at the entrance to Tony’s apartment building. Never knew the name of where he went when he moved out before today. At least, I assume he went to a different building. I haven’t cross-checked addresses to know for sure.

  39. izzy1957 says:

    It occurred to me from your previous postings Karen that if Ottavia and Anthony were both visitors to Cats in the past, that perhaps Ottavia is also still keeping up here as well.

  40. Lynn says:

    Ah thanks Karen. It’s been years since I was on IG so I have forgotten many of the functions.

    This post is interesting:

    no one wanted her on his show either, he threatened to leave if they wouldn’t give her work. But then on the shoots she was too drunk to do anything. She’s been using him since day one.

    And here are some choice comments from French director Catherine Brillat about Asia. Now, I can’t stand this woman. She’s a female misogynist IMO. She is against #metoo and has defended Weinstein. The only one of her films I ever saw was gross – its basic premise being that vaginas are repulsive to men. That said, it is interesting she echos some of the same theories about Asia that have been mentioned here. Namely, Asia’s opportunism:

  41. Laura N. says:

    This is all as horrible as I imagined it would be from the moment I saw him with her. Her energy is dark and depressive. She ruined his life and she was causing chaos in his career. He didn’t stand a chance.

  42. catsworking says:

    izzy, I don’t know if either Bourdain ever actually followed CatsWorking (Tony told me he didn’t want to appear to “endorse” it), but Ottavia told me she used to check in regularly years ago when I met her. That’s when I was writing a lot about them. She was the one who first discovered me.

    I hope she’s still reading because we and the cats send her nothing but love.

    I think she has followed me on Twitter since I first joined. That’s a funny little story. When I discovered her Twitter account, I mentioned it in a blog post here. (This was when I could still find scoops.) I don’t remember the numbers, but she had followers maybe in the low three digits, if that. She instantly picked up hundreds of new ones (which told me people were reading this blog). From there, it grew organically until she became a big Twitter presence in her own right.

    Now, she seems to have moved on to Instagram, tweeting seldom. I was just looking at her page, and seeing all those pics of Tony in his gi and blue belt brought tears to my eyes. All that training, wasted. If only he’d choked Asia out. (I mean that figuratively, of course. Not condoning murder.)

  43. catsworking says:

    Lynn, I read the article you linked to. I’ve never heard of Catherine Breillat (I don’t get around too much 😉 but she seems to have some firsthand experience with Asia. I think calling her a “mercenary and a traitor” pretty much summed it up.

    Misogynist she may be, but she and I are pretty much in sync with Asia’s whole Weinstein story, as is the Italian media in general. You can’t spin it both ways.

  44. Lynn says:

    Here’s JFT’s instagram link in case anyone has trouble finding it:

  45. catsworking says:

    Laura, the accounts coming out from Tony’s new defenders on IG are hair-raising, especially about Asia’s behavior on the Hong Kong shoot. Was he REALLY so blind that he couldn’t see she wasn’t helping? Would he REALLY turn on the people he’s worked with on hundreds of shows for YEARS to defend that skank?

    It makes me more firmly convinced that something else nobody knew about was going on (medically?) and he was preoccupied with that. But rather than deal with the underlying issue, it was relatively easier to make Asia the focus and let everyone think if he fixed that, all was well.

    But when she started drowning out EVERYTHING during his shoot in France — from a distance, no less — it overloaded his circuits.

    I just wonder what made him so desperate that he felt compelled to take her phone calls and disrupt everybody’s work, even though he knew they were going in circles? Had he really lost it to the point that he thought she was his only hope? Was he afraid that she would expose some secret of his out of spite?

  46. MJ says:

    I’m so glad I found this blog. As a huge fan of Bourdain’s work, I’m still crushed and am heartened to see how much others care and are questioning things. My heart breaks for Eric Ripert to have had to find is friend the way he did, too.

    I watched the Rome episode when it was new, before he went public that he was dating AA, and I did not come away from that first viewing feeling like I’d just witnessed a great connection or love story. Time with an “exciting” edgy tatted rocker chick, maybe.

    I’m glad that Ottavia had the position and right to act as next of kin and keep class and restraint (keep the circus outside).

  47. Randi says:

    “Was he afraid that she would expose some secret of his out of spite?”
    Karen, I think you are on to something here… I thought the same. No doubt he has confided some very personal things about himself to Asia while they were together. Sadly he trusted her… up to a few days before his death. And she betrayed him big time! He was no doubt exhausted from work and confused about everything at the time he committed suicide. He may also have had medical issues to deal with. If he had, I’m sure Asia knew. Still, she chose to run around in Rome with Hugo Clement, and even stayed in the same hotel she did with Tony – how low can you get!!

    Wish he had reached out to his close friends.

    I read the link Lynn posted, it also says:

    Breillat eventually turns her attention to Asia Argento, who has accused Weinstein of sexual assault and who starred in Breillat’s film “The Last Mistress.” “To be very honest, I don’t believe Asia,” she says bluntly. “I know her, and she was very, very young…If there’s anyone I don’t believe, it’s Asia Argento. As a person, Asia Argento is quite servile. I never asked her to kiss my feet, but she’s that kind of person. I don’t believe Asia. If there’s anyone capable of defending herself, who’s not timid about sex, who does it a lot, and has lots and lots of desire for both men and women, it’s her. So I don’t believe Asia.”
    Asked what Argento’s motivations for lying might be, Breillat is just as frank. “For Asia, it was obviously, let’s say, motivated by self-interest — it was a kind of semi-prostitution. Harvey Weinstein’s not the worst man there is; he’s not the most stupid, either. Asia may have been disappointed that she didn’t become a great Hollywood actress she might have been, but there were lots of other things: drugs, many other things. She feels bitter. Because bitterness, too, can lead people to denounce if you wanted to obtain something and you didn’t obtain it, if you feel humiliated. Quite honestly, I don’t like Asia. I think she’s a mercenary and a traitor.”

  48. izzy1957 says:

    A copy and paste from a Page Six article below. But, if this is the so called truth, what really prompted its removal? The report of Anthony’s death by suicide? It just as easily could have been left up and an explanation given to clarify. Don’t forget the graphic on the tee-shirt was of Sid Vicious of the Sex Pistols, who was purported to be one of Bourdain’s favourite groups/idols. The only tie-in to Cannes would be the “You know who you are” sentiment.

    And, now with the justicefortony comments we have more background of them fighting, etc., not forgetting she also said “F**K EVERYONE.

    Meanwhile, she also took to Instagram to clear up a seemingly cryptic post she made — and then deleted — hours before Bourdain’s death was announced on June 8.

    That photo showed her wearing a ripped, black T-shirt that read, “F–K EVERYONE” with the caption, “You know who you are.”

    Argento — one of the first women to accuse disgraced movie mogul Harvey Weinstein of rape — explained that the post was in direct reference to her scathing Cannes speech last month and not about the late celebrity chef.

    “It was exactly that. The Cannes speech. ‘You know who you are,’ ” she explained in the comments section on one of her posts. “Why are these sick people twisting truth into morbid fantasies?”

  49. feijicha says:

    I don’t know that I’d conclude that because Ottavia ‘liked’ something someone posted that it’s automatically true; it certainly could mean that or it could be that she’s piecing things together and/or she’s keeping tabs on what’s out there. I tend to think she wouldn’t ‘like’ something that she knew was false, but I’m just saying we can’t say for certain. What a grim picture it all paints in any event. The fact that he ‘seemed better’ right before he ultimately took his life is not, sadly, all that unusual in suicides. Sometimes when someone has made the decision to take their life, they feel better, or relief, like, ‘ok, I have a plan and I know what my next step is’. This is not the case for everyone, but it’s what many who have attempted suicide and not ultimately succeeded have reported about their experiences. We will never actually know if he had come to a decision at some point the day of, or whether it just came to him in the moment, after some shitty phone call(s) or other communications with her. How awful for Ottavia to have to be monitoring social media to track info. But it certainly sends a message to anyone who knows anything that they aren’t upsetting her if they post what they know.

  50. catsworking says:

    Welcome, MJ! Trust me, when I heard of Bourdain’s death, the first thing I did after spitting coffee through my nose was run to the computer to put out something — ANYTHING — to give my Bourdain readers, who had mostly drifted away since his life advanced beyond what I could cover — a place to vent and mourn. And they all came back. We have a long-standing relationship with Tony, and it has hit this blog VERY HARD.

    When I saw the Rome episode, I definitely thought there was some banging going on there, but I had no idea who hard and fast he fell. I wasn’t seeing the reason for the attraction, except that she may have reminded him of Ottavia in certain ways. (Italian and brunette with tats, mainly. Turns out, they are NOTHING alike.)

  51. catsworking says:

    Randi, Asia has been making little noises on IG about “more to come” or “the truth will come out.” Don’t remember her exact words. It feels certain she knows something we don’t, and she’s figuring out how to best weaponize it. Simply to clear her name (which she can never do, the photos don’t lie)? Or perhaps to get a gig on CNN if she promises to keep the memory of their greatest star untarnished (rotsa ruck with that)?

    Who knows? I don’t put anything past her. If there’s anything she has from this relationship that she can turn to profit, she will. Just like she did with Weinstein.

    But whatever inside knowledge she may have, I feel it will be made public from another quarter, if only to render her powerless if she gets too pesty. The truth is just beginning to be told. Now we just have to hang on and see where it takes us.

  52. catsworking says:

    izzy, thanks for this info. I have to laugh. So, Bourdain fans are “sick people” with “morbid fantasies”? Maybe she should select her words a bit more carefully. “Everyone” is pretty all-encompassing, but it was supposed to be clear she meant only people at Cannes. Yeah, whatever. Pretty lame excuse, even for her.

  53. Lynn says:

    I can see how he’d defend Asia to anyone who spoke against her and push even friends away if they expressed any distrust of her. That’s what people do who are crazy sick in love with someone. I also get his attraction. (Emphasis HIS attraction; not that I think most men would be into her. Tony wasn’t most men, in good and bad ways.)

    I found out they were a couple after the Rome epi and immediately thought ‘of course’. I could totally see why he was into her. She’s gross, damaged, dangerous and bad for him – all the stuff he loved. She was the personification of the drugs, cigarettes, alcohol and other harmful things that he was drawn to throughout his life. She was dark and he loved dark shit. Plus she was into and highly knowledgeable about film and music, his passions outside of food.

    But sadly he had a lot of empathy and sensitivity which she clearly does not and that’s a big way they differ. I can’t imagine him flaunting a new relationship in her face the way she did to him. I don’t even understand half her posts. ‘Life’s a bitch and then you die’? How is this inspiring to anyone in or out of the #metoo movement? How does this help any woman who has been assaulted?? Just cryptic attention-grabbing BS. I’m sure there are plenty of media outlets who’d salivate at the chance to interview Asia for ‘her side’ of things, CNN aside. Or maybe she’ll have ole crazy eyebrows/bad facial work Rose do the interview as a proxy.

    What I don’t get is how Tony could ever let anyone compromise the WORK. That work was sacred to him. So how, even if he loved the person, could he let someone do a shitty job, be drunk on set, and waste time and money during shoots? It’s like he was hypnotized by her. I wonder if Eric was one of the ones trying to warn him about Asia and how he reacted. But really no one could have changed his mind. I’ve seen this with girlfriends who date bad men. If you try to warn them you get nowhere.

  54. catsworking says:

    “What I don’t get is how Tony could ever let anyone compromise the WORK. That work was sacred to him.”

    Exactly. And you’re so right about him being attracted to all her darkness. She brought out and validated all that he thought was the worst in him.

    He went into a tailspin and became suicidal after Nancy, even though he initiated the breakup. Bounced around with a few women until he met Ottavia. Then he evened out and cleaned up his act once he became a dad.

    But once things with Ottavia went south, he must have been in the greatest despair of his life. I think he and Ottavia could have coasted along co-parenting for years, except that he had the misfortune to meet Asia and seal his fate. She never could pull him off the path to self-destruction. If anything, she’d have committed suicide with him just for the notoriety.

    It wouldn’t surprise me if she isn’t already shopping her story to see if she can cash in on interviews while she and Rose are working on the book she’s undoubtedly going to write. I just hope American outlets realize what they’re dealing with and tell her to get lost. We need her to stay on the other side of the Atlantic.

  55. Bacardi1/Bonnie C. says:

    I strongly doubt that Tony would give a damn about Asia announcing any underlying medical condition he had. Really doubt he would care about something like that at all. In fact, I doubt he did what he did because of any “fears” concerning her whatsoever.

    He was smitten/entranced/whatever, & decided that this was the last time that he was going to go through this. The only illness going on with him was most likely mental illness, which is frankly what suicide (outside of terminal illness cases) are. He wasn’t a 16-year-old kid; he was a 62-year-old man, but wasn’t functioning the way a normal 62-year-old adult would after being faced with another breakup & life challenges. Most adults can go thru relationship changes/breakups repeatedly thru life without tossing in the towel. He couldn’t. And should definitely have searched for help, but apparently even that wasn’t in his mindset.

    Don’t get me wrong – his death is positively TRAGIC, & I will miss his shows terribly. I have nearly all of them recorded or on dvds, have all of his books, & even went to see him & Eric Ripert in person (front-row seats) when they were on tour.

    But suicide outside of the terminally ill IS & always will be a mental dysfunction, & I think that – regardless of Asia’s actions – we will all have to eventually come to the realization that Tony had deep problems that he never properly addressed with someone who could help. Asia may have helped in taking him from the world sooner than anyone would have liked, but it would most likely have happened anyway at some point if he hadn’t gotten professional help.

  56. feijicha says:

    I’m not sure she would have committed suicide with him, notoriety or not. I think she just liked messing around with shit that made her seem dark and dangerous but really she’d hang around for the notoriety. If she killed herself she’d miss all that. She lives for the attention.

  57. catsworking says:

    Bacardi, we’re going to have to agree to disagree on this one. If it was Parkinson’s, that would have been a deal-breaker for him. He was too proud to let the world see him slowly deteriorate, and if he couldn’t live on his terms, that was it. Asia and her shit just hastened a decision he may have made months ago.

    And in the reams and reams of writing he did for print and TV, I don’t see evidence of serious mental illness. Unless you count the graphic novels and comic books. Those were weird. But I’m no psychiatrist, so I could be completely wrong.

    One thing stood out to me in something justicefortony said, which was than Bourdain seemed fine when they last saw him Thursday. Some mental health professional I saw said that people about to commit suicide may appear normal or even happy because they’re relieved that they’ve finally made the decision to do it. Could that have been the case here?

  58. Bacardi1/Bonnie C. says:

    Well that’s what I specifically meant Karen – the mental illness, or if you want to call it warped thinking, that causes suicide. Nothing else. Folks who give up with that finality do have a mental wire loose somewhere.

    And if he had been diagnosed with something like Parkinson’s, I doubt he’d suddenly do away with himself during an episode shoot like that. It would have been better planned, & Asia antics wouldn’t have had a thing to do with it.

  59. izzy1957 says:

    Ottavia and mushroom geek have also shockingly followed me back on Instagram, and I’ve never posted a single thing there. I’m on Twitter:


    I got quite pissed the other day when I saw Asia’s Twitter post about always being kind and then her cryptic added comment about “For nothing is concealed that won’t be revealed, and nothing hidden that won’t be made known and brought to light”, implying perhaps there is something more here as others are also now wondering, and that perhaps Anthony even shared something with her that hasn’t come out yet. Said I was having difficulty with her continued posts/messages, and that the world is waiting for her to reveal the truth, so if this is an offer we’re waiting to hear what happened between them or STFU!

    Had some back and forth with some other Twitter posters who saw my reply to her, and only one of which was defending Asia and chiding us for blaming and piling on a grieving woman crap, and as I said, “To post her comments to the meme is like playing a child’s game. We’re adults. It’s almost like giving a hint to that there’s something more but not saying what.”

    I just simply got angry, and angry enough to respond.

  60. catsworking says:

    He may have already have made the decision to commit suicide whenever an illness became something he couldn’t hide. But if Asia was that much of a problem during the shoot, and if they had broken up, he knew he was never going to hear the end of questions after the way he stuck his neck out to extol and support her. Keep in mind, he was constantly giving interviews. This would have been a daily thing.

    “What, you just shot Hong Kong with her, said it was your best work, wanted to hire her as a regular but couldn’t afford her, and now she’s suddenly history? What’s up with that?”

    So rather than face the humiliation of that (compounded by withdrawal from his heavy Asia addiction and the prospect of being alone again), and any illness, he just decided, “Fuck it. I’ll go ahead and check out right now. Problem solved.” At that point, he wasn’t thinking of anything or anyone else.

    Had it not been for Asia’s histrionics, I agree with you that he would have done it in a more discreet and planned way if that’s what he was going to do. Although he did say in an interview in February or March that he intended to “die in the saddle.” He did it.

  61. catsworking says:

    izzy, I just followed you on Twitter. I’m out there as CatsWorking, but be warned: don’t follow me if you like Trump. He’s my grappling dummy on Twitter.

    I’m seeing a pattern here. We’re virtually circling the wagons and Ottavia is apparently with us. We shall all get through this together. In the end, Asia will never prevail, online or career-wise. She has no idea how totally outnumbered and outclassed she is.

    For example, the state of New Jersey is talking about establishing an official Bourdain memorial “food trail” of 15 restaurants Tony visited when he shot a show there. He grew up in Leonia, NJ.

    We’ve got NEW JERSEY on our side. Morgan knows how huge that is. I’d dare Asia to walk into any one of those places and find out what kind of welcome she gets.

  62. L Villeneuve says:

    Just some thoughts,

    Tony with history of IV drug use and playing the field,
    ex-wife prints photo of him naked in a pool with another man,
    domineering mother, second wife has affair with mma grappler,
    girlfriend with history if IV drug use and promiscuity ++.
    Perhaps HIV?

  63. Lynn says:

    I agree with Bacardi. No one can make the claim that Asia’s actions directly ‘killed’ Tony. After all, plenty of famous people get publicly humiliated by exes. (Unless of course there are texts of her flat out telling him to kill himself. There has been at least one case of that kind of bullying on Facebook where the perpetrator was held liable for the victim’s suicide).

    But..that doesn’t mean she wasn’t a big factor in his decision on top of whatever depression/mental illness had made him off and on suicidal for years. The timing is just too on the nose. I also have been wondering would he have ultimately killed himself if he hadn’t met her. I would vote probably yes.

    Either through smoking and increased drinking (some sort of terminal disease), or there’d be another woman, another breakup. And as his situation with Nancy shows, a woman didn’t have to ‘do’ anything mean or vindictive to put him in a suicidal mood after a breakup.

    IF there was a bad diagnosis, that’s a no brainer to me, as he has often said he wouldn’t want to live with some awful disease. But as Bacardi said, it’s not like Parkinson’s goes from barely noticeable to incapacitated overnight, so why do it during a shoot?

    I wonder how much Eric knows – how much Tony confided in him. Men can be surprisingly hush hush with even their closest guy friends about this kinda stuff. So alas Asia may be the only one who knows the full story (barring anyone finding emails and texts).

  64. catsworking says:

    OK, LV, you’re hitting me with some new stuff here. IV drugs and screwing around – check.

    Ex-wife prints photo of him naked with another man – ?? Which ex? I remember seeing a photo (on TMZ?) of him naked in a pool, but I think he was alone, and he seemed to know who did it, but I didn’t get it was a wife.

    Domineering mother – maybe, probably? She was Jewish. There’s a stereotype.

    Second wife affair with grappler – hmmmm… I read a very damning article about him being made a cuckold by all the young studs Ottavia spent her days with, but it seemed all conjecture, and it was shortly before they announced their split. I’ve never seen another word about her with other men outside of the gym. Have you got some proof?

    Girlfriend druggie, skank – check.

    HIV? It’s a possibility, but I doubt it. I have a client in my day job who generates a lot of material about HIV/AIDS and there are amazing drugs now to prevent it and make it virtually disappear. After all these years, if he felt exposed, it seems he’d have protected himself. I’m still thinking Parkinson’s is more plausible.

  65. Bacardi1/Bonnie C. says:

    I do agree with you that Asia’s antics were most likely what drove him over the edge, but also that there had to be an underlying mental/depression thing going on as the basis.

    I still don’t think it had to do with anything physically wrong with him.

  66. catsworking says:

    Barcardi, he had dark personality traits without a doubt, and said he couldn’t be left alone and idle for any length of time because it could get bad. I don’t know the answer to this, but are people who suffer from depression able to be so consistently productive? Or do they periodically withdraw and go into nonproductive funks? I can’t recall a time since I’ve known of him that he withdrew from the public eye, except during his Augusts in the Hamptons. If anything, he was consistently manic. But he also seemed genuinely happy about life.

  67. Bacardi1/Bonnie C. says:

    And come on people!! I really think we’re letting our imaginations run away with us big-time. Parkinson’s?? HIV??

    This was a inwardly tortured depressed soul who didn’t get the help he needed & was pushed over the edge by a wrong relationship.

    I know that we’d all like to think there was more to it, but I sincerely doubt that was the case.

  68. Bacardi1/Bonnie C. says:

    We seem to have posted at the same time, Karen.

    But yes – depressed people can frequently be highly productive. Just look at bipolar disorder for a start. Most of those folks are outrageously productive interspersed with dark periods.

  69. catsworking says:

    Bacardi, thanks for talking us in off the ledge. 😉

    However, from the way he looked in the last year, I do think more was going on than Asia and depression. Hope I’m wrong.

  70. izzy1957 says:

    In all of my research on learning more about Bourdain, I came across an article somewhere, where he specifically mentioned by name who it was that he blamed for the “nude pics” of him in the pool in St. Maarten being stolen/leaked and given to TMZ. It wasn’t stated as proof by him, but obviously a strong belief of whom was responsible. So, it wasn’t his ex-wife Nancy, but some other male in his industry, and that is why he didn’t associate with that person anymore and had written him off.

    I’ve done a ton of reading, and did try to check my history to try and find it again a couple of days ago, but came up empty.

  71. Lynn says:

    People can look like holy hell and not have an underlying serious disease. Anyone check out keith richards lately? They said he was smoking a lot. That alone can make you skinny. Lots of nervous energy can contribute to making you skinny. Add MMA to that? And increased drinking and exhaustion. Years of not using sunscreen. Not surprising he looked old and haggard. Plus some people just don’t age well. Michael J. Fox (who actually has Parkinson’s) looks 15 years younger than Tony did and he’s only 4 yrs younger.

  72. Bacardi1/Bonnie C. says:

    Agreed. I continue to believe that no physical medical condition contributed to this.

  73. catsworking says:

    Lynn, true. It’s just that he seemed to age so much so fast. I’m still watching my piled up episodes and watching the dates to see if I can get a better handle on when the serious slide started. But all your points do contribute to aging.

    I’d said earlier that Tony looked a lot older than Christopher Doyle in the Hong Kong episode, who I took to be about 80. Just looked him up and he’s only 66. So… neither of them were aging well. Joke’s on me.

    I think the sun is a huge culprit in aging, and I’m betting Bourdain wasn’t one to be slathering on sunscreen every few hours when he was shooting outdoors. He was starting to look like leather.

  74. catsworking says:

    izzy, same here. I’ve read SO MUCH about Bourdain over the years, it’s like a needle in a haystack to find tidbits I’ve seen. Chances are I either posted or linked to them here and they’re in the archives.

    But I feel I read something recently about the nude pool pic, and I believe he thought it was someone in the restaurant business. Aha! Here’s a link to the photos on TMZ:

    Nancy took them in 1999, but they weren’t published until 2011, so who else had them? The article doesn’t say.

    He also posed himself for the infamous “boner” photo where he was holding a huge bone over his junk. And we saw enough of him in various spas on his shows.

  75. Bacardi1/Bonnie C. says:

    Again – people, you need to get a grip. Bourdain wouldn’t give one whit about those pictures. You guys need to calm down.

  76. catsworking says:

    Bacardi, never fear. Now we’re just reminiscing. Of course he didn’t care. The days when we could get excited about a boner pic seem so innocent and long ago…

  77. Lynn says:

    I don’t think I’ve ever seen that pic. lol He didn’t look so hot then, either. Really skinny. Just sayin’. 🙂

  78. Lynn says:

    Ok, WOW. This Rolling Stone piece on a 26-year old Asia is both disturbing and hilarious. Just please do yourself a favor and don’t read it while eating. What pretentious garbage.

    An excerpt:

    Then we spoke our mind. Rather, we blurted the words. “What kind of girl are you?”

    Without pause or discomfort, she said, “Very solitary, creative and introverted, but also outside of myself, and a bit twisted. I am young. I didn’t know that. But I don’t recognize myself. That’s my problem with the mirror. Who is this? I don’t know. I see only the ugliness. My teeth represent me. They tried everything when I was a child to make them straight. I told my father, ‘If you’re going to put braces again on me, I am going to kill myself.’ He said, ‘Fair enough.’ Now they are as crooked as my soul. I like them. I am oblique.”

    Teeth as crooked as her soul. lol Yep, copy that.

    She says her fave smell is “a lover’s armpit”. LMAO Because, of course it would be.

    Her fave movie is Freaks. Because, of course, why wouldn’t it be?

    And then there’s this:

    “I am melancholic only when I deceive myself with dreams of being able to have a boyfriend or live with somebody or have a normal love life.”

    “Maybe I’m scared of intimacy,” she said, calmly enough. “Or maybe I’m disgusted by it after a while.” (Bingo!)

    “With guys, it’s always like, ‘Do you love me? Why do you love me?’ It’s never free. I want somebody to have fun with, and it’s never like that. Guys want to put a cork in my mouth and censor me. They’re scared of my past and the fact that I’ve been a very curious person all my life. I’ve never had a guy who encouraged me. They want to change me.”

  79. feijicha says:

    ok well that last bit sure as hell doesn’t sound like Tony:

    “Guys want to put a cork in my mouth and censor me. They’re scared of my past and the fact that I’ve been a very curious person all my life. I’ve never had a guy who encouraged me. They want to change me.”

  80. catsworking says:

    Not in 1999 when he was still cooking. But the literal “boner” pic was Bourdain at his finest. He was nicely filled out but not paunchy, and not so many tats.

  81. Bacardi1/Bonnie C. says:

    When I saw him live with Eric Ripert back in 2011 he looked just fine. Both of them were thin but fit.

  82. Morganlf says:

    Ottavia is monitoring and showing tacit support by following supporters. I can see who she follows since I follow her on IG justicefortony & mushroomgeek are on her radar. I hope it gives her some relief to see we are all here.

    On IG I use another name with a private account:Rb_queene

    But that’s me in the comments section. And for all you Argento fucks who’ve been coming at me…bring it, I’m from Jersey.
    Rb queene is a nick name from high school, Rumble Queen, take from that what you will.

    I also posted on twitter under @morgan_lf to @aanelvictoria
    That post has been viewed 2,850 times.

    Wagons circled.

  83. catsworking says:

    Lynn, thank you for that link. I am definitely going to read that article. Sounds like she’s revealing the origins of her madness. But I’m pooped for the night (long day working like a slave on an article for a client) and can’t do it justice.

  84. iwonder says:

    Tony’s belief was that it was Steven Tempel, his former sous chef, who sold the picture to TMZ. It is in the following interview, where (oddly for The Guardian) they have made a mistake with Steven’s name and stated his surname as Moore. It was reason for him not to be in contact with Steven anymore, but he did not seem troubled about it.

    “Steven Moore, my sous chef during the ‘90s, was the best one for practical jokes. If someone only put a potato in his shoe, he’d remove the door from their locker and fill it high with porn mags. (Sometimes he used to arrive at work with sperm on his shoes.) I still appreciate that he had no shame whatsoever – an admirable quality, of sorts. But I’ve no connection with him now, since it is my belief that he sold a dick pic of me to the gossip site TMZ.”

    Full article:

  85. iwonder says:

    Also, I didn’t see this posted here before, but in case it hasn’t been, this is a wonderful interview covering Tony’s life in depth:

  86. iwonder says:

    And this 24 minute interview Tony did with Fast Company this past September really gives an insight into his state of mind at that point in time. Still grateful, driven and committed to quality work. Still kind, perceptive and humble. “Life is good.”

  87. Lynn says:

    Bruce Elliot, friend of Tony who appeared on at least one Chicago episode, is really giving it to Asia and Rose on his blog. He’s the first person I’ve seen do so non-anonymously. I love how he points out that if it were reversed, if Asia had seen Tony cavorting around with a younger woman, and she killed herself, #metoo and Rose especially would be “up Tony’s ass” blaming him.

  88. bamboo.skewer says:

    Thank you for gathering all the info here! I am slightly obsessed with following this trail about Asia. I’m motivated by exposing injustices. Narcissists enrage me. Their existence, what they can do to good people. It’s so unjust and unfair. (I’m not talking about “too many Instagram selfies” type narcissism — I mean the chaotic, destructive, gaslighting narcissist that will feed on your soul for their benefit. Sound like anyone?)

    There’s a meme going around with the question “What does depression look like?” It shows a smiling happy person. Yes absolutely, a person can have depression and people may have no idea. You can function well in public. You laugh. You smile. Maybe too much, because you over-compensate. No one wants to be around a sad person. You can be a leader in your career, run a meeting with the top experts in your field, then drive home ruminating about your worthlessness the whole way. People at work would be stunned to know what goes through your head, because they don’t see the you that you know.

    Nearly everyone who commits suicide has depression. They also call depression a hidden disease.

    I would not want a person who is wrestling with themselves to fall for someone like Asia. These articles describe the person he was dealing with, and these are older. Surely during the ensuing years, Asia further honed her craft in “being Asia:”

    A narcissist doesn’t just want to benefit from you. If they don’t get their way, they want to wreck you. Who knows what he dealt with those last few days.

  89. iwonder says:

    Hi Lynn, yes that blog is pretty great. And good to hear from someone who knew him.

  90. feijicha says:

    thanks for posting Bruce Elliot’s blog. Wow. I don’t know how copyrights might work with blogs, but here are a couple choice bits that really struck me (feel free to remove this if it violates intellectual property rules):

    Argento seems to be a woman who lives without aim or end. Her life appears to be little more than a series of domestic calamities. She has two children, but if she ever sees them she’s keeping it a secret. ….. One minute Anthony is “One of the wisest, kindest, and superior men that ever lived,” and then a few days later, “Tony embellished his own amours considerably. His love for me never existed, or if it did was much exaggerated. Our relationship was a tragically absurd, satirical burlesque. It is hardly necessary for me to offer anyone an explanation for my actions, especially an explanation to his vulgar admirer’s, who are nothing more than a pack of idle dogs.”

    …In fairness to Argento, Anthony was not a perfect boyfriend. She says he would cobble together five-days a month to spend with her. I assume the rest of his very limited free time was spent with his 11 year-old daughter in New York. Anthony constructed a life that distanced him from over-strained social interactions; I think it was obvious to his most observant fans that he not so secretly bore the scars of long held resentments, and disappointments.
    Anthony and Argento did not make for a healthy couple. They bore a striking contrast in personality, manner, temper and talent. Argento’s eyes reveal an expression of slyness and design; there is also an expression of anger tempered by caution. She reminds me of a rattle snake. “You’ve been forewarned by my rattles, when opportunity offers I will strike without mercy.”

    … I think it is quite possible they were mutually tired of each other. After exhausting the attention her romance with Anthony had provided her, and not hindered by conventional manners, Asia was looking for an opportunity to escape their relationship. All well and good. However, she gratuitously decided to rub Anthony’s nose in shit to achieve this end. When she was making a scene with young Hugo Clement in Rome, it would be interesting if at any point she felt the slightest qualm of conscience for her romantic peccadillo’s? Anthony knew she was no virgin. I don’t think tears of jealousy filled his eyes when he saw the photos of Hugo and Asia. I think it was her calculated vindictiveness. Instead of jealousy, I think he was overwhelmed with humiliation.

  91. feijicha says:

    sorry, hit send too soon. He also states that there are rumors that Rose McGowan is quite jealous of all the attention Asia is getting. Coz that’s what you worry about when a friend dies. smh.

  92. feijicha says:

    A link to a couple of women who worked with Tony, one was his producer for 10 years. No real news but they confirm what he was like to work with:

  93. iwonder says:

    Oh, Diane is wonderful. If you can find it, watch the episode of No Reservations ‘Making of India’ for an incredible behind the scenes insight into Tony’s crew and the whole crew’s bond. She features heavily in it and makes me laugh with her realness and being just generally fun.

  94. catsworking says:

    Morgan, thank you. I know I can count on you to help me set things right and get the truth out there about Bourdain. As we always have.

  95. catsworking says:

    iwonder, thank you so much for that link. Excellent reporting! I read this interview just recently, which is why I had vague recollection. I’ve read so much about Bourdain in the past week and a half, it’s all running together.

  96. catsworking says:

    iwonder, yes, this is a great interview. Lots of research done. For someone who hasn’t read his books, it’s an excellent mini-bio.

  97. catsworking says:

    Lynn, I wasn’t able to find the blog post about Asia and Rose. In your post from the link, he says he’s going to do it, but then there’s a random list of other posts to the left and no search feature that I can find to locate that follow-up. I would like to see it and how far he went. I’m mulling my own strategy right now.

    Here’s another post he wrote about a conversation he had where Tony was very disenchanted with life on the road.

  98. catsworking says:

    Welcome, bamboo.skewer! If you hate gaslighting narcissists, you have found a home here. Trump’s attempts to mind-fuck the world for his own glorification bear creepy parallels to Asia’s relationship with Tony. More on that later.

    Thank you so much for the links. The NY times piece about her movies is particularly disturbing. This is one sick, sick woman.

  99. izzy1957 says:

    Yeah, she’s not coming out smelling like a “rose”, is she now?

    If I were “Rose McGowan”, I’d be distancing myself from Asia for more than possible reasons of jealousy, albeit, Rose has been relatively quiet on this front as of late, leaving me to wonder if Asia’s narrative to Rose is perhaps crumbling away and not holding up quite so well.

  100. catsworking says:

    feijicha, you obviously found the blog post I couldn’t. I am in awe of Bruce Cameron Elliott as a writer and for laying it out about Asia. I can’t agree with him more, and noticed myself that she always had a sly, self-satisfied expression (when she didn’t look drunk or stoned) in photos with Bourdain when he looked like a man in love. At least in the earlier photos. Toward the end, he just looked tired.

    Because I feel Bruce’s purpose is to try to explain what was going on with his friend, I don’t think he would mind your excerpts appearing here to expand his audience. Just as I don’t mind someone lifting from Cats Working if it helps to spread the truth about Bourdain’s last days.

    Yesterday I received some reliable information that I will share as soon as I get time. A client’s project has a deadline I’m still working on. Once that’s off my plate, I’ll be back with a few more answers to our questions.

  101. catsworking says:

    issy, Rose may have her hands full. She’s facing 10 years in prison in Virginia for cocaine possession. She claims Harvey Weinstein framed her.

  102. sheilawinona says:

    Few days from now it’s his birthday. I hope he is truly in peace. And I also hope that Eric Ripert or someone close to tony will speak up about the tragedy in full details..

  103. catsworking says:

    Welcome,sheilawinona! Yes, Tony’s 62nd birthday would have been June 25.

  104. Lynn says:

    So Asia tongue kissed a dog and ‘incorporated him into’ her pole dancing for a movie. (NYT article 2007). She is so gross and disturbed.

    According to justicefortony, the cinematographer whom Asia demanded be fired (and Tony agreed due to his his love-haze/hypnosis) was Zach Zamboni. I also was reading a Hollywood reporter article by Tony in which he says he got an ‘Asia Argento’ tattoo. He didn’t elaborate on what it looked like. Did it have devil horns? A succubus? Oh, I know – a garbage can with ‘look at me!’ spray painted on the side. Or an ashtray. How about a stopped-up toilet? Ok I’m stopping.

  105. catsworking says:

    Lynn, congratulations! You have officially given me my laugh of the day. I’m still laughing at your possible tattoo designs!

    I’ve seen a photo of Asia in the dog scene and it’s absolutely revolting. If they’d have asked her to fuck that poor animal, no doubt she’d have done it with gusto. At the end of an article I just read about her movie credits, she mentions that someone told her the dog had died, and made a joke about hoping it wasn’t from their kiss.

    And I just learned five minutes ago from poring over IG about Zach. I’m working on a new post right now with some other stuff I’ve learned.

  106. Daisy says:

    Cats, I saw that same photo with the dog and it is disgusting. Did you catch in the Rolling Stone article that her father actually filmed her losing her virginity for a movie. I can only imagine what that does to the psyche. Also, as a child instead of fairytales for a bedtime story he read horrror stories to her…Isn’t that sweet. This is all very wacky, sick stuff. Is it any wonder this is the outcome. It pains me to think she is actually “raising” two children.

  107. Bacardi1/Bonnie C. says:

    Oh Wow – Zach Zamboni of all people. I understand that he & Tony were fairly close. In fact he starred with Tony in the “No Reservations” Maine episode, which is where Zamboni is from.

  108. Lynn says:

    Just shows how far into the succubus Tony fell. I just saw the dog images. That poor dog. He looks like wtf is this rancid thing? I hope he got extra treats for having to smell her mouth. Maybe they had to put the treats IN her mouth to get the dog anywhere near it.

    Yes Daisy there are many obvious reasons why she’s messed up. Her childhood was awful, her father downright perverted and unfit to raise anyone. None of that’s her fault, but there are many screwed up people out there who still manage to treat people decently and act like a professional on a shoot.

  109. Daisy says:

    This thread is moving fast since I checked yesterday. I want to thank everyone for such great comments!! I learn so much from all of you.

    Bamboo Skewer, Totally agree with what you wrote about the Narcissist. I have experienced it first hand and it can and does send people into a total breakdown. There is no way to describe it unless you experience it. I am grateful I came out of it alive!

    There is no doubt in my mind AB was dealing with either a Narcissist or there Twin a Borderline. Both are your worst nightmare. In the beginning It feels like you met your soulmate, you can’t believe how perfect it is….BUT then they change. Things go from good to bad to much worse. The cycle repeats and with each repeat you are sucked further into this black hole. A crazy love addiction cycle ensues and it’s hell to get out. It is truly awful. I have total sympathy for AB and I know he went thru hell with this woman long before the suicide.

  110. Daisy says:

    Lynn, Oh yes, I agree with you totally! I am in no way defending her behavior at all. A messed childhood does not give anyone permission to act out or hurt others. Her childhood was very sad and her father a real sicko. But, as an adult she is responsible for her behavior. The thing is personality disorders are very difficult to change. It is the rare one that will actually seek help. The best defense is to stay away from them and have NO CONTACT.

    I don’t have time to write more so will quickly wrap up and say I think AB as we all know was in a vulnerable state and that is exactly when they see opportunity.

  111. catsworking says:

    Daisy, it’s like Asia was raised in an X-rated Addams Family.

    We must have read the same article about her movies. The link is here somewhere. She was 22 when her father filmed her nude. She was 21 when Weinstein went down on her, proclaiming herself such a shy and innocent flower she had NO IDEA what to do. But she was perfectly OK getting naked in front of Dad a year later to simulate full-on sex.

    And when you read her filmography, it’s like she’s always been the go-to girl for the most lurid and depraved parts ever written. It’s no wonder she’s so totally twisted, but why didn’t Bourdain’s instinct for self-preservation never kick in?

  112. catsworking says:

    I certainly hope ZPZ has hired Zach back. In fact, I hope they rehired him the minute they got back from Hong Kong and just kept him out of Asia’s line of sight.

  113. catsworking says:

    Lynn, you are simply killing me today! I’m picturing the makeup people smearing Asia with bacon grease to make the dog get chummy. She must have loved it.

    It brings to mind a close-up photo I keep seeing of her with her hand to her face, fingers covered with rings. One has spikes sticking out of it. WTF? How practical is that, unless you’re looking to hurt yourself – or somebody else.

  114. Justice says:

    The “Asia Argento” tattoo AB had was a traditional Japanese tebori tattoo that matched one Asia had of a chrysanthemum, but his was blue.

    This all brings to mind the “dark triad” personality traits of narcissism, Machiavellianism, and psychopathy that are apparent in people with parasitic behavior and a history of deceit. She’s high drama. It sounds like she’s used many people. Unfortunately those traits can sometimes include a degree of personal magnetism.

  115. catsworking says:

    Justice, welcome! Especially if you’re THE Justice. You’re doing great work in bringing the truth to light.

    Now, holy, holy, shitballs. Tony had so many tattoos that I kind of lost track of them all, but THAT was the Asia tat? I watched a video of him getting it. It was HUGE. And very blue.

  116. ABisWithUs says:

    Hello catsworking, thank you very much for providing this forum. My heart goes out to his family, friends, and fans. You are always here AB!

  117. catsworking says:

    Welcome, ABisWithUs. I feel like Bourdain is somewhere out there shaking his head in disbelief at all this. But at least he’s safe, far out of reach of Asia’s poison.

  118. Farid says:

    Long time reader, first time commenter.

    Thanks for providing this forum for folks to grieve, to share stories, to provide information on how we managed to lose one of the greatest raconteurs of our time.

    Tony is gone and that is the reality that we have to grapple with and it’s hard. VERY HARD. It’d take me a long time to speak of him in the past tense. I hope he is in peace now …

    Thanks again Karen.

  119. catsworking says:

    Farid, welcome! I love your use of “raconteur.” You are totally accurate in that he was one of the best in fostering conversations among people you’d think should never converse.

    As I respond to comments here, I find myself correcting my verb tense from present to past. Still hard to absorb that he is gone. Thank you for joining us in recognizing the loss of Anthony Bourdain as a force that made our lives more tolerant and inclusive. If only Trump had been watching and taking notes.

  120. Phoenix says:

    What I don’t understand is Asias net worth is 16million according to google, ABs is exactly the same too, 16mil. Why did she have to use him for money?

  121. catsworking says:

    Phoenix, I was just trying to remember Ottavia’s age (40), and what I found in many articles all over the ‘net was age 51. Lesson: You can’t believe everything you read.

    A couple of clues tell me Asia’s not too well off:

    1. Rose McGowan, in her big defense, said Asia “needs” to work for her children’s sake.
    2. Tony said CNN couldn’t “afford” to have her as a regular director. (On second thought, that could have been a double entendre; he could have meant either money or her disruptive temperament that kept the crew in turmoil.)
    3. I remember being surprised by how dumpy-looking her apartment was when Tony had dinner with her kids in the Rome episode.

    If I wanted to get real catty, I’d add that her clothes always look like they come from a thrift store and she probably cuts her own hair, but I won’t go there.

    And if she came from so much wealth, why did she spend years accepting major gifts from Weinstein?

  122. keely says:

    Yeah, I don’t believe her “using” had anything to do with money. I was in a relationship with a nearly-sociopathic narcissist (and that’s being nice, he probably was an actual sociopath but since he didn’t kill me, I try not to speculate LOL). He often made weird comments about money, like assumptions and bizarre accusations about how much I/my family had, but when it came down to it, that wasn’t important to him. What was important to him was destroying me. By the time I finally cut off all contact with him, I was pretty fucking broken like Tony must have been.

    But back to the money: my “ex” — if you can even call him that, he was sleeping around the whole time we were together, just like Asia — would tell me I was rich when I wasn’t; in fact, I’m certain that his family had more money than mine. But he seemed to be very jealous of the fact that I was HAPPY with what I did have. People like this, like Asia, don’t seem to ever be happy with what they have. It will absolutely never be enough. Nothing. Ever. Will. That is what everyone has to understand. There is nothing you can give to an Asia that will ever satisfy. That is why we call them vampires!

  123. keely says:

    Actually, just to clarify, I do not have any insider knowledge that Asia was cheating on Tony the whole time as I implied in the first comment. But I have read some articles where a friend or friends of Tony did say that they felt she had been doing this.

  124. keely says:

    By the way, if you go back to like October or November 2017 on Asia’s Instagram, there should be a picture of her laying down in what many people would probably identify as a bed, with a guy kissing her on the cheek. It really didn’t look innocent or platonic to me. The guy was tagged, he is some semi-famous musician. She may have deleted it by now though, of course. I think there are/were other photos like this throughout the months that she & Tony were supposedly boyfriend and girlfriend, but with a bunch of different guys. Just like my ex, she had no shame. It’s pretty clear.

  125. catsworking says:

    Welcome, keely, and thank you for that perspective. What I see in Asia is the same insatiable need for attention that I see in Trump. And they’re both desperate for approval. But when they don’t get it, they assume a “fuck everyone” attitude like it doesn’t matter, but it probably eats them up.

    Asia is definitely what I’d call a vampire, even though she’d probably like that description.

  126. catsworking says:

    Keely, from what I’ve seen of Asia, if she was on a bed with a guy, it wasn’t platonic. I don’t think she even needs a bed.

  127. keely says:

    LOL. On another note, I’ve been thinking more about the motivations behind my ex’s strange statements, and I realized something. This is important to share because it relates to Asia as well. So what I realized is that it may not have actually been that he was ‘jealous,’ but rather, he wanted me to question everything. When you question or second-guess yourself and all that you know to be true, it becomes that much easier for the narcissist/abuser/sociopath to establish control over you. Classic gaslighting, right?

    So basically, yes, Tony DID have a pretty strong sense of self and a powerful “bullshit detector” — I call it intuition, but those are his words, as you quoted somewhere — but this is EXACTLY what makes someone the perfect target for a narcissist! If they can break a person who is this powerful, then they will get a high that they can’t find elsewhere. Their favorite thing in the world is dominating, controlling and eventually breaking someone who they essentially recognize as powerful — in a REAL way, since they know they are just frauds. And, again, this is why the word ‘vampire’ is so apt. A vampire doesn’t have any use for someone who is lacking in energy/life force/power.

  128. catsworking says:

    keely, yes, one of the biggest tools in the narcissist’s toolbag is gaslighting. You didn’t really hear what they just said. You did really see what they just did.

    As a country we’re being gaslighted from Washington right now with such intensity, it’s a wonder we haven’t all blown up or been asphyixiated.

    Once the initial shock that her punching bag was gone for good, Asia realized that all her tactics had worked and she’d managed to “break” the great, seemingly indestructible Anthony Bourdain, so she danced around to “Stayin’ Alive” to gloat.

  129. mrc551 says:

    Karen, Maggie here, and if you don’t mind, just some random thoughts.

    I forgot to mention that I first found your blog back in 2007, April or May. It was around same time Ariane was coming into the world. I remember back in the day when AB stated he wasn’t interested in social media, especially Twitter. He did not seem eager to jump onto the social media wagon. So ironic now that we see how his final days played out on social media in the grips of a toxic relationship.

    I started following Ottavia on Twitter when she had like 99 followers. I saw a photo of her and AB in a low-slung sports car, she was wearing sunglasses and a scarf. I told her she looked like a movie-star. She did. They looked good, both of them–smiling and the picture of health. Better days. It makes me sad even thinking about it.

    Also…been poking around here and catching up on some of your older posts. The one about AB not being keen to show teeth in photos… Speaking as one who dealt with “teeth-issues” for many years until I had them fixed…nothing pissed me off more than having people tell me to “smile” or “show your teeth”. AB had a somewhat crooked toothy-smile. On him it looked good. So what if his teeth were not perfect? But maybe he was self-conscious about it. A lot of folks have undue awareness about their flaws that other people actually don’t even notice.

    My hope is that AA never makes a cent of profit from her relationship with AB. I am here, and also on @justicefortony as a way to lend support. Maybe media outlets, publishers, etc might have serious doubts regarding AA’s credibility and not do business with her. To say that Anthony Bourdain was a once-in-a-generation voice sounds cliched, I know. But true, and I will miss him for the rest of my life.

  130. catsworking says:

    Maggie, the image you’re remembering of Ottavia in the sports car is from the Rome episode of No Reservations they did together. That’s one of my favorites, but Ottavia has said she had a cold and felt miserable the whole time.

    I think WordPress might have dropped the earliest months of my blog because I feel sure I was blogging about him before September 2007, which is the earliest post I could bring up. I’ve got them all somewhere, and I’ll have to check. I started this blog to support my book, How to Work Like a CAT, which was published in late 2006 and I think that’s around the same time I discovered Bourdain. I’ve always thought I started blogging sometime in early 2007.

    I could always tell when Tony was genuinely having a good time by the way he’d forget about his teeth and smile broadly which he does in a lot of the family meal scenes. You can look at thousands of pictures of him posing with fans and never see a tooth.

    Unfortunately, I feel AA will undoubtedly find a way to monetize her time with Bourdain. My bet is on a book deal.

  131. ganjamastaakush says:

    Just want to add this extremely important detail if no one has connected the dots yet about the ripped T-Shirt that Asia posted before Tony took his own life. That post, and tshirt with the crptic message -Fuck Everyone- “you know who you are,” was not directed at the media, or reporters as people think ,or she said, but If you look at Anthony Bourdain’s instagram profile a bit further back before all this unfolded, he made a post with Sid Vicious holding a guitar wearing a coat that says, “This means you.” Those two incidents are directly related, because the Tshirt Asia was wearing was Sid Vicious. From what I can conclude from the timeline, and common logic, that was her way of saying “Fuck you tony”. This whole situation has me heart broken, been severly depressed since this all unfolded, barely got out of bed, or worked. Tony was one of my heros in life when it came to food, culture, traveling, and just being a genuine good hearted human being. I knew though the day it happend that something wasn’t right. None of this has sat well with me well, and frankly dealing with being bipolar, and severe depression I dnt know if or when it ever will. Just want the truth to be known at this point 😥

  132. catsworking says:

    ganjamastaakush, you have done some serious research in trying to connect the dots. If we believe what poster justicefortony said on Instagram about Tony and AA arguing over the phone in the days leading up to his death, and Eric Ripert saying Tony was in a “dark mood” at that time, then the signs do seem to point to AA putting on the “Fuck Everyone” T-shirt to taunt him. And then like the typically passive-aggressive bully, say it was directed to people at Cannes, but pull it offline anyway.

    Just like Trump telling us Melania’s “I don’t really care. Do U?” jacket was directed at the “fake news media.” That claim doesn’t even make the slightest bit of sense.

  133. joan lazzerini says:

    karen do u or the cats have any info about whether anthony kept up any kind of connection with nancy after the divorce apart from his health scare e mail? i think he should have stuck with her!

  134. catsworking says:

    Welcome, Joan. No, I have no idea if he and Nancy kept in touch. I don’t think they hated each other, but once he remarried, there would be no reason to keep Nancy on a front burner.

    Your question caused me to go to my bookshelf and rearrange all my Bourdain books in order of publication. He dedicated the first 7 to Nancy, ending with the Les Halles Cookbook in 2004. I seem to remember Ottavia saying something to me about Tony’s mother being upset that he’d dedicated a book to Nancy, even after they were apparently kaput. It must have been the cookbook.

    He dedicated his next book, The Nasty Bits in 2006, to the Ramones (I assume) — Joey, Johnny, and Dee Dee. This would have been when he and Ottavia were just dating, but the manuscript may have already been with the publisher before he even met Ottavia.

    His next book, in 2007, the No Reservations companion book, was dedicated to Ariane. Ariane his daughter was born in April 2007, so I’m assuming he meant her, not the Ariane (somebody) his daughter was named after.

    As far as I know, Nancy has maintained silence all these years, except for that one interview (New Yorker? Vanity Fair?) where she talked about Tony’s health scare in France and how he contacted her.

    What’s weird to me is that over the years I’ve had various questions and comments that are pro-Nancy, and they always seem to come from a Joan. Coincidence?

  135. joan lazzerini says:

    thanks for ur reply karen and the cats. It must be a coincidence because i’ve never written to u before! makes u wonder though doesn’t it? I share ur opinion about asia and wish he had stayed with nbr one or two but this was a man of addictions. Moderation was something he was unfamiliar with and it appears he was addicted to asia also the drinking didn’t help. he should have cut that out when he ended his other addictions. as i write this i realize that we can see others’ problems with much more clarity than we can see our own. sincerely,joan

  136. catsworking says:

    joan, here’s a hoot. I was just searching to see if Nancy’s sister’s name is Joan (I think it is) and I found this TOTALLY CRAZY website that purports to know Nancy’s weight, bra size, favorite actors and other shit. Says she has no college, but she graduated from Vassar. It also claims that her net worth is $2 million.

    But the information on it is SO SCREWED UP. They seem to think Ottavia is Nancy because there are several pics of Ottavia and NONE of Nancy. And the 3rd photo down, of the woman in the orange jacket with Tony, is ME! (I guess I do look more like Nancy than Ottavia ever will.) We took it the last time he came to Richmond. I’m looking at it framed on the bookcase beside my desk right now.

  137. joan lazzerini says:

    dear karen and the cats now that it has been a year since anthonys death have any of his intimates, his other brother eric ripert lydia collins made any remarks about asia argento except that she was his girlfriend? just wondering joan

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