Have a Crazy, Catty Christmas

By Max

This year, we’re getting real. Our Christmas tree didn’t come out of a box in the closet. Karen went out and killed this one. She wanted the house to smell like Christmas.

(Adele footnote: It really came from Home Depot. I saw the receipt.)

(Adele footnote: It really came from Home Depot. I saw the receipt.)

What’s even better, it’s just my size!

Its little branches can hold only a few ornaments, so we dug out the best —our own personal ones, of course — and those of the late Fred and Yul. I’m told those guys loved Christmas.

I helped decorate.

We also hung bells. Lots of bells. Those were NOT my idea.

We also hung bells. Lots of bells. Those were NOT my idea.

(Unfortunately, the camera flash doesn’t let you see how beautiful the tree is all lit up, so here’s another shot.)

Colored lights make it look like a giant cat toy.

Colored lights make it look like a giant cat toy.

Unfortunately, this tree has almost no smell at all. I check it every day.

Sniff… sniff… Nope, must not be Christmas yet.

Sniff… sniff… Nope, must not be Christmas yet.

Karen hung our stockings on the chimney with care, but she still hasn’t found a better alternative to all the stupid buttons on mine. So she let me raid her jewelry box and jazz it up with all her cat bling.

Adele is pea-green with envy.

Adele is pea-green with envy.

Once all the presents were in place, Cole conducted an inspection, found our section, and declared it a ColeZone. He’s taken a special interest in one sweet little parcel wrapped in red tissue paper.

Every Christmas tree needs a guard cat to watch the presents. Cole parks himself on that red one like a mother hen.

Every Christmas tree needs a guard cat to watch the presents. Cole parks himself on that red one like a mother hen.

Adele should go to work for the TSA. I think she must already know what Cole’s red present is.

Who needs a body scanner when you have claws?

Who needs a body scanner when you have claws?

Adele also became suspicious of a green present for our cousin Noel and wasted no time making sure Karen wasn’t trying to smuggle desirable flavors of Fancy Feast out of the house.

Hallelujah! Noel’s getting all our yucky Turkey & Giblets!

Hallelujah! Noel’s getting all our yucky Turkey & Giblets!

Me, I’m more interested in the tree. How often does a cat get a piece of the forest in his own living room? The only thing better would be if Karen invited my squirrel from the deck inside.

Good thing Karen used sturdy boxes, or somebody’d be having a smashed Christmas.

Good thing Karen used sturdy boxes, or somebody’d be having a smashed Christmas.

I’m looking forward to the Cats Working traditions of a special breakfast and playing with whatever Santa Kitty brings us, then settling back with treats and fresh ‘nip to watch Video Catnip.

It’s a wonderful life.

Adele, Cole, Karen, and I hope Santa Kitty is good to you and your kitties and you have holidays you’ll fondly remember.


16 Responses to Have a Crazy, Catty Christmas

  1. britta says:

    Thank you kitties for the report. Given that all of the Moore clan are seniors, we don’t have the jubilant Kitty Christmas excitement we used to have and miss the celebratory plundering. We will try and spin up our group with some good nip and treats but alas, the days of tree and package exploration are behind us. Merry Christmas to all!

  2. annie pelfrey says:

    Christmas IS all about our “babies”- too cute!

  3. imabear says:

    That is adorable!

  4. Bacardi1 says:

    Same right back atcha, Karen & the gang!

    We bought a lovely 8-1/2 footer, but haven’t put it up yet thanks to visions of what our own dear “Ming the Merciless” will do to it. This will be his first time ever of seeing a Xmas tree, & the way he considers the entire house his personal Mt. Everest, I can already see the cat-astrophe!!

    Merry Christmas, all! 🙂

  5. jimmie chew says:

    moewy xmas you guys!

  6. catsworking says:

    Meowy Christmas to everybody!

    Bacardi, I hope you get your tree up soon so Ming doesn’t miss out. Last year Karen put up her big fake tree and left it undecorated for a week to give me ample opportunity to do my worst, since it was my first Christmas. I climbed all over that thing and got it out of my system pretty well before she tarted it up with stuff I wasn’t supposed to touch.

    With this little tree, as much as I have “leaned” on it, it’s a miracle it hasn’t fallen over. But we have another little fake tree (you can see a bit of it in the first pic. it’s sitting on a little table right in front of Fred Astaire). It’s got fiber-optic lights and Karen doesn’t decorate it. As soon as she put that one out, Cole had knocked it off the table within 5 minutes. He didn’t mean to, but he freaks out whenever anything changes, and that little tree displaced a lamp and he was disoriented.

    Christmas morning last year was kind of a bust because none of us kitties participated much, so Karen is hoping for better this year, now that I’m older and more “paws on” with the preparations. Adele was probably mourning the loss of Fred and Yul, because they always made Christmas fun, but from her interest in the presents, I hope she has regained some of her spirit. And Cole… who knows?

  7. Zappa's Mom says:

    Zappa is EXTREMELY jealous! I am far too lazy and I don’t want to clean up his mess! He does have such a good time helping me wrap gifts that I often consider a tree the next year. Maybe I will buy a wreath today.
    Merry Christmas to all of you,Karen,Adele,Cole,Max and all of the fun contributors that make me laugh out loud all year long.

  8. catsworking says:

    ZM, it is your DUTY as a parent to give Zappa a good Christmas. He’s showing his spirit by helping you wrap gifts. At least meet the poor guy halfway! From the sounds of it, I bet he’d be THRILLED to find a crumpled ball of tin foil on the living room floor Christmas morning, if you told him it was left by Santa Kitty.

  9. adele says:

    First of all, thanks to the CatsWorking crew for the birthday tweet. I’ve been having computer trouble,so I haven’t been around much (my keyboard is sticking like mad, for no apparent reason)

    Alice, Dorothy and I wish all the Cats Working crew and readers a very Merry Christmas. I thought about getting a tree, but Dorothy is a one-kitty destruction crew, and I don’t think it would stay standing long. She has a habit of racing from one end of the apartment to the other, always landing on the console table I have behind the couch — she’s already knocked two lamps down, and that’s where I would have put the tree. Alice,the recluse,just lives in fear that a gent in a red suit will come through our fake fireplace.

    I’m doing Christmas Eve, too — Feast of the Seven Fishes. We’ll see how everything turns out.

  10. catsworking says:

    Adele, Karen rewrapped that Fancy Feast Turkey & Gibs yesterday, and in no time SOMEBODY had ripped it to pieces again, even though Karen craftily placed it in another area under the tree.

    And last night Cole went uncharacteristically Christmas Eve Eve berserko and dragged his red present from under the tree and tore into it a bit more, but we still can’t tell what it is. From the length of it, I’m afraid it’s SWITCHES!

  11. Bacardi1 says:

    Just returned from a last-minute run to PetSmart for dog & kitty treats & toys (to add to the 30 or so toys already scattered all over the house. . . ). Kitty highlights? A wicker ball with a bell inside, A new fuzzy catnip mouse to add to the burgeoning catnip mouse collection, & – the piece de resistance – a rather large (8″-9″) felt bird with a real feather tail. When you so much as just touch it or move it, it bursts into real bird song (has a sensor inside). Just bringing it into the house had “Ming the Merciless” running from window to window thinking there was a bird close by.

    Tree still isn’t up yet, but tonight’s the night. Snow is starting to come down like gangbusters at the moment. We might have a white Christmas after all.

  12. colehauscats says:

    What a lovely tree! Looks like you have the right decorating bug! Hope you had a wonderful day! Purrs…

  13. Bacardi1 says:

    Well, we finally got the tree up (9-1/2 foot tall, actually) on Xmas Eve. Had to brush the snow off of it & let it dry a bit before decorating. Dear “Ming the Merciless” examined it while it was still buck naked, but after a brief foray into the lower branches, apparently decided it wasn’t worth his time or efforts, & had completely & totally ignored it!!!

    Just when you think you have a cat pegged, he totally amazes you by doing the complete opposite of what you expected. . . . .

  14. catsworking says:

    Man, Bacardi, talk about cutting it close! And I know what you mean about having a cat pegged.

    As hot as Cole was to get into that red present, he actually didn’t succeed in opening it until last night (Dec. 26). It’s one of those toys on a stick with a bunch of neat new stuff we can watch Karen dragging through the house. And there’s even ANOTHER present under the tree for us that we haven’t opened yet. Karen likes to drag it out through New Year’s Eve, since we usually all just sitting around here staring at each other anyway. (Why am I saying “usually?” This is only my second time at this. Adele’s jaded attitude must be rubbing off on me!)

  15. Zappa's Mom says:

    Max,I wanted you to know that while Zappa didnt have decorations to destroy,he was thoroughly spoiled by Santa! He got two different kinds of treats and several CW-approved toys.And of course,the boxes and bags that the gifts came in!

  16. catsworking says:

    ZM, I am so glad to hear that you did right by your Zappa. He deserves the best (as do all kitties).

    Sorry it took so long to get back to you. Karen was taking a break, so she took away the keys to all the computers! We were lucky to slip a few tweets past her.

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