DC Bend Over, Here Comes Glenn Beck

By Yul

If you can’t get enough of Glenn Beck’s rants on TV and radio, you have a chance to catch his act live on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial tomorrow, where he’s holding a “Restoring Honor” rally.

Beck claims it’s pure coincidence it’s exactly 47 years to the day after Martin Luther King, Jr., delivered his immortal “I Have a Dream” speech there. Surely, Beck would never try to hijack such an historic occasion for self-glorification. He’s probably just humbly hoping that TV crews catch any black people who might be milling around looking for Al Sharpton’s King commemoration and make them look on the evening news like Beck rally attendees.

And how much do you want to bet that Fox will report attendance in figures astronomically higher than any other news outlet?

Beck also claims the rally isn’t political because he invited no politicians. That’s why he’s holding it in DC instead of some Kansas cornfield. Apparently, royalty doesn’t count, because Sara Palin, the Tea Party’s unofficial queen, will be by Beck’s side so they can egg each other on, criticizing and mocking Obama and Democrats right on their home turf.

I mean, who needs hope and change when the world would be perfect with NO progress — and even better if we could turn the clock back 50 years?

But Jon Stewart ripped Beck a new one on The Daily Show far better than this cat ever could. The segment is called “I Have a Scheme,” and I’ll let Jon take it from here.

39 Responses to DC Bend Over, Here Comes Glenn Beck

  1. Zappa says:

    The Lincoln Memorial is about a 10 min walk from my house.I’m gonna walk over tomorrow and throw something.I notice that you said “egg each other…”

    Zappa’s mom

  2. catsworking says:

    Ooh, Zappa’s Mom, you are bad!

    Was just reading that Levi Johnston has retracted his apology to Palin, saying Bristol put him up to it and it was easier to keep them happy than to be honest.

    At this point, I don’t think that kid knows which end is up.

  3. Zappa says:

    When needled on whether he was considering a run for Mayor’s office just to extend his 15 Minutes he pointed out that Bristol had agreed to appear on Dancing With The Stars for….why? I think he is a complete tool,but he had a point.People of Wasila(sp) if you vote for him,you deserve him.


  4. MorganLF says:

    Talk about a tool! This f’ er is an ex-druggie, alcoholic who turned all preachy boo-hoo. Reformed rabid-Christian dopers are you should pardon the expression, pussies.

    I mean who CONVERTS to Mormonism? Which is nothing more than a thinly disguised cult hiding out as Christians, so a bunch of old men can bone 13 year olds against their will? Nice god fearing people them Later Day Saints gang.

    This cry baby douche is SO racist he can barely stop himself from calling the president the N’word.

    Zappa’s Mom throw a few eggs for me and bounce one off that super-intellect baby maker, moose killer for me too!

  5. MorganLF says:

    Oh Jon Stewart- brilliant!

  6. Zappa says:

    Dear Cats Working
    I live about 10 min walk from the Lincoln Memorial.My neighborhood has been invaded with Glenn Beck zombies and the streets are flooded with KoolAid.Send….help…please…

  7. Tuxi says:

    Hi Yul! To me, Glenn Beck is the equivalent to what I left in the litter box this morning. If we cats here lived closer to DC, we’d have given Mom permission to take all of our Moggie Missiles and fire them at that Egotistical Load of Effluence! We saw a headline “Beck calls for thousands in DC” and thought maybe the singer Beck was asking people to donate to a cause, then remembered the Moron Megalomaniac from Fox was having this damn thing! We like the singer and his song Loser fits this asshole!

  8. Joanaroo says:

    Hi Yul! Tuxi, I would gladly take all my kids’ missiles, a box of surgical gloves and a slingshot and when the Hypocritical Hemmorhoid gets to his sphiel, TWANG! In order to keep the spot clean where Dr. King made his speech I’d put the missiles in perforated vegetable bags so Beck gets the essence of the effluence, and I wouldn’t miss! ;>) It would be hard to miss that Conservative Cesspool!

  9. Tuxi says:

    About Bristol. A star? Isn’t that on the Disney-owned network? So, she gets pregnant without marriage, but because she’s white, GOP/Tea Party trash, she’s a star? Yet the young Disney Customer Service Rep who wears a vest, shirt and pants can’t wear her hijab because it would *interfere with her costume* She’s in Administration, not portraying Minnie Mouse! Unbe-freaking-lievable! Disney better recheck their priorities!

  10. catsworking says:

    Morgan, Karen here, because Yul doesn’t know any Mormons. The only Mormons I have ever known are ones who converted in adulthood. They must have made the mistake of answering the door, and some got sucked in during lonely and vulnerable times in their lives. The Mormons seemed so warm, caring, and friendly — just what they needed. Before they knew it, they were trapped in the magic underwear and believing all the hokey history and teachings. The more I learn about that “faith,” the harder I find it to believe that any rational human being could embrace it. But the Mormons haven’t cornered the market on nuttiness. All religions seem to have a high level of, “It doesn’t make any sense, but trust us, it’s true.”

  11. catsworking says:

    Zappa, I saw in today’s paper that they are expecting 300,000 of the brain-dead to show up.

    Leonard Pitts wrote a great column today about the outrageousness of Glenn Beck trying to rewrite history and claim that neocons deserve all the credit for the success of the civil rights movement.

  12. catsworking says:

    I also saw Florence Henderson’s name mentioned, but don’t know if she’s signed on yet. Can’t you just see her dentures flying out of her mouth doing the jive?

    Bristol may be hoping that appearing on national TV in those skimpy Latin costumes will net her a new boyfriend and make Levi pea-green with jealousy.

  13. Tuxi says:

    Oh, hell! Not Ms. Brady too! Reminds me of a jingle-*This rally doesn’t have any personality! Ray Stevens of Everything Is Beautiful fame is one of these morons involved in this crap! On C-SPAN they have on the REAL rally saluting Dr. King, and if they are wanting to carry truth, they’ll show ONLY this rally!

  14. Tuxi says:

    Whoa! Wait! Two black ministers on here, white people cheering them, and black people cheering them and at the bottom of the screen it says this rally is sponsored by Glenn Beck? WTF? You gotta be kidding me? How did they pull off this clean of a rally so far? Oh no! Not animal lover Tony LaRussa too! How are these people so blind?

  15. Tuxi says:

    Oh lovely. Boy, are these people something! We thought this was Al Sharpton’s rally, but we should’ve know Beck and co. would pass themselves off as something they are not. Albert Puljols got some kind of award for stuff outside of baseball and he thanked Glenn Beck and said this was all because he found Jesus. Oh, Christ! Mom turned it because we were both ready to puke! These damn brain dead people are going to suck this up like brainwashing. Beck told people to keep their signs at home. Yeah, so people don’t see the real message these guys send! C-SPAN, you misleading bastards! And on C-SPAN 2 they have on a guy from the Heritage Foundation. C-SPAN 3 has on a broadcast from the National Cathedral fron 3/08. They should allow equal time and broadcast the other tribute being done today!

  16. catsworking says:

    Tuxi, we heard on the radio that the Beck rally is almost all white. He’s preaching bringing America back to God, so I guess that means the people who worship Allah, Buddha, or anybody else can forget it.

    It’s incredible that Beck’s followers can’t see that their insistence on “my way or the highway” with religion — AND their insistence on forcing it into government — is no different from the fanatical Muslims.

  17. Tuxi says:

    Now we have on the REAL rally, the Reclaim The Dream rally on C-SPAN. This is the one that should have been carried live, not the Beck Propaganda Show! This is the one that is the real historical one because the African-American people speaking are the ones who lived through the pre-civil rights era and are still putting up with discrimination from the likes of Glenn *I really am a racist bastard, no matter what I said today* Beck. Mom is beside herself because Beck just thinks what he does is a joke and blames *liberals* for saying he’s a racist screaming banshee. The dirty SOB, we were hoping his God would strike him down with lightning out of the clear blue sky with all the lies he was spreading, but no such luck! I guess Beck’s God doesn’t listen to the wishes of us liberals!

  18. Zappa says:

    The Tea Baggers,uh,Partyers have all left and nothing has changed.Bye

    Zappa’s mom

  19. Tuxi says:

    We cats should get together en masse and have a fish fry, nibble catnip and have a fence-top American Shorthair Idol and Grow Up, Humans rally. What I saw today at the Lincoln Memorial was akin to the dogs who pretend their chain is shorter than it really is, and when we walk near it, the cur chases us until it forgets that chain ends and it chokes itself. Let’s hope Beck finds the end of his chain! Or hope he did and no more pretending. I liked the Dunbar High School speeches and found them motivating. Mom liked the *The happy white people are here!* quote. The Beck farce was like a Klan rally without a burning cross. We cats are ready for bed. Hot weather is coming this week, starting tomorrow and we need sleep to ready ourselves for heavy napping!

  20. Zappa says:

    Hi Guys!
    Let’s piss off the Tea Baggers and outsource that Fence Top Howl-In to Belgium while we do imported catnip!

  21. catsworking says:

    Tuxi and Zappa, I like your idea for a rally. How about we hold the Million Meow March on Washington. The Mall full of cats as far as the eye can see, all yowling to end human stupidity. I bet it would get Congress’ attention faster than Beck and Sharpton put together, and you could throw in a LimPaw, too.

    I’m sorry to say that the Richmond paper today was boasting it sent 15 busloads of Tea Partiers up there, and the Amtrak trains were packed, too. But that also meant it was a good day to be out and about because the town was refreshingly free of the stupid people.

    Tuxi, thank you for providing the running commentary during the rallies. Karen wouldn’t let us watch them because Cole and I can get carried away with the whole “Black Power” thing and get feisty. Karen said Adele didn’t need any more reasons to have her tail in a fluff.

  22. Tuxi says:

    Yul, you’re welcome! The only part Mom missed was Princess Palin the Shrill Shill’s speech. She and Mom Terri went to a craft sale and chix BBQ, but I watched the hussy. What a load! Mom got some cat crafts, a matted (the picture, not the cat) cat with sunglass picture-the photographer’s cat, and some woodblock note cards of cats that he made. Very nice! Mom is putting all the pictures in climate-controlled storage until she paints the indoors, then the house gets decorated in Cat Art!

  23. Tuxi says:

    I love the Million Meow March Idea! All the outdoor and semi-outdoor cats can pledge that they will allow mice and rats to take over all places occupied with GOPers! Sounds good to me!

  24. catsworking says:

    Tuxi, it sounds like your house is headed to look like this place. Our mantel is crammed with wooden cats Karen has collected in her travels. She started when she realized a big ceramic vase of silk flowers was doomed sitting on that narrow ledge above the slate hearth that we cats could reach via the ceiling beams > high bookcases > mantel. I’ve tried strolling among the cats and have knocked a few off, but they don’t crash well. No fun at all.

    People also give her a lot of cat stuff. For every occasion, the answer to, “What should I give Karen?” seems to be, “Something with a cat on it!” Like having 3 real ones isn’t enough. It’s kind of insulting.

  25. catsworking says:

    Letting the red states become overrun with vermin sounds like a plan to me, Tuxi. And the next time some crackers like Beck and Palin decide to spew their thinly-veiled racist nonsense by co-opting a place with historical significance for blacks, black cats (and tuxedos, of course) should gather on the spot for a mass sit-in.

  26. Tuxi says:

    And if they are as superstitious about black cats, as we think they are, they will be fleeing the beltway with tails between their legs. We can wear vests saying *Never forget the Salem Witch Trials! Never forget the cats who died at the hands of Christian fanatics!* That’ll shake them up a bit!

  27. catsworking says:

    Tuxi, I think what you’re suggesting is what Glenn Beck would call “reclaiming the legacy.” I like it!

  28. All in all, I like the guy. Yes, I think he is dramatic at times, but it seems like everyday communication includes a little showmanship to convery your message. I’ll tell you, he seems to be calling it accurately so far. If nothing helps, he make everyone think just a little bit more!

  29. Adele says:

    Since I was having 10 people over for dinner Saturday night, I just didn’t pay as much attention to the Glenn Beck extravaganza as I should have, but thanks to you, Yul and Zappa & his mom and Tuxi, I feel as though I’m caught up.

    I did notice that on Twitter, people were referring to it as “the million moron march.”

  30. catsworking says:

    By “calling it accurately so far,” would you be referring to when he called Obama a racists who hates white people, or when he just admitted he sometimes shoots his mouth off and gets it totally wrong?

    Unfortunately, his followers can’t tell the difference and take every word he says as gospel, and he’s marching them straight back to the Dark Ages while making himself rich off their gullibility.

  31. Wendy says:

    I went to the rally and enjoyed it.

  32. Zappa says:

    The weather was nice and it was a pretty day


  33. Tuxi says:

    But it wasn’t accurate, it was all pretend. Would the 2 black ministers have been there had the Obama as a jungle warrior and Obama as an ape signs been held by attendees? Would the rally have been seen as such a *positive, inspirational, Christian* event had Beck been doing his television ranting on blacks, President Obama supposedly being an alien resident and Muslim, and if Beck had included all the anti-muslim rhetoric being spouted by the right? Beck wants politics to be all-Christian, so there’s your constitutional GOP wanting to deny all other religions an opportunity for representation. By the way, Beck can put that idea where the sun don’t shine! The Founding Fathers DID NOT found this nation as a Christian Nation (God forbid!) but as a nation with separation of church and state, With Liberty and Justice FOR ALL!

  34. catsworking says:

    Tuxi, you said it. Separation of church and state, not neocons ramming God (which, backward, spells “dog”) down everybody’s throat. That Beck presumes to know what God’s intentions are for this country is just proof of his delusional windbaggery. If America really wanted to “reclaim” its greatness, it would show some intelligence and independent thought and laugh Beck, Palin, and their sheep-herding ilk back into the obscurity they deserve. Then they’d have to find real jobs to make a living, instead of sucking their fortunes out of the rubes who worship them.

  35. Tuxi says:

    Mom has dyslexia, which she notices is more pronounced the older she gets, but she loves the T-shirt with the running dog on a leash saying *The Dyslexic Untied Church of Dog*. She uses the back key alot when on a typing fury because she will spell a word changing letters around, then go back and change it. She gets to laughing when reading and tells me what word she thought she read and what the word really is and the first version can be pretty humorous. She does treat it seriously but it does not have her in any danger. She would like to see Princess Palin shouting at bears instead of shooting at them!

  36. catsworking says:

    Tuxi, I think our new next-door neighbor, Heidi the German Shepherd, who spends her days trapped on her deck because the backyard of her house has been allowed to grow wild and who-knows-what is lurking back there, would prefer to belong to the “Untied Church of Dog.” She’s got the crazy eyes of a frustrated nomad.

  37. Tuxi says:

    That’s messed up! I hope for Heidi’s sake with the hot weather that they have shade for her and plenty of cold water to drink! Dog owners really make me wonder! Before I checked back here, Mom texted the Weather Channel and it’s 97 with 26% humidity and a 57 degree dewpoint. We’re hoping Earl and Fiona give us some rain! It’s dry as a hayfield here! We also were thinking about this post and the Belgian cat post and how similar they are. The Beckies don’t want the Muslims to have their center, they don’t want illegals in the country, but what do they think of legal immigrants? Many Muslims who have been discriminated against are first- or second-generation American born! And in Belgium it’s all purebred cats! No Moggies! That sucks. I see a Hitlerian tone in both. In Beck’s case, he felt he had to pretend he was someone he really isn’t to gain attention. That sounds like that German monster of the 20s and 30s who charmed the German public and military into doing what he wanted. He had them in the palm of his hand wlth the ugly speech of the *inferior races* Don’t know what Belgium is trying to prove, but I don’t trust Beck as far as I can spit, which isn’t far!

  38. catsworking says:

    There are lots of trees in Heidi’s backyard, so she’s got plenty of shade. Don’t know about the water. Can’t understand why her stupid humans let her sit out there and bark all day. I think they’re at home. This is not the type of situation that Karen will put up with for long. She’s already been over there once to talk to them about the barking.

    Heidi’s not a bad dog. She sounds bored. We’ve never seen them walk her or play with her. Why the hell have a dog if you’re going to shun it 24/7? I just don’t get it.

    I also don’t understand why humans feel they have to exterminate anyone they don’t like. Bedbugs, OK. But cats and immigrants?

    Maybe Beck should take a page from Belgium and start talking about mandatory sterilization for anyone caught in the country illegally. The very thought of the old snip-snip might keep some of them from coming here in the first place.

    I think it’s only a matter of time before Beck’s got his followers goose-stepping around the Lincoln Memorial.

  39. Tuxi says:

    And let’s hope Beck makes himself an example and does the snip-snip first! What a looney toon! I read where he joined the LDS because a chick said she’d let him service her cooter if he did. YUCK! The ultimate in stupidity! So, let’s put him, the tiger smuggler, the Coventry C. U. Next Tuesday and all the other i-doits in a boat and sink it in the gulf with the newest oil rig that exploded and has a mile wide oil sheen already! Drill Baby Drill? Nah! Palin already had her lobotomy!

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