Let Supreme Court Star in Crush Videos

By Yul

In a breathtaking departure from sanity, the Supreme Court decided 8-1 in U.S. v. Stevens that cold-blooded, premeditated murder is a freedom-of-speech issue and struck down the “Crush Act.” Depictions of helpless creatures being brutally tortured and killed is once again a legitimate form of expression.

The court has reinstated perverted carnage as a dandy form of entertainment because they thought the wording of the Crush Act was so broad, it might impinge on the rights of hunters to film legal animal slaughter.

Now Dick Cheney need never fear he’ll be denied a photo op while mowing down defenseless birds or friends of his. The court has made it once again open season on innocent puppies, kittens, and other small animals who will meet horrible ends to satisfy sickos’ sexual fantasies.

It’s too bad all the justices except Samuel Alito, the lone vote of compassion, won’t ever enjoy the thrill of being under a dominatrix’s stiletto as she slowly grinds it through their livers while talking dirty and laughing at their agonized screams.

Fortunately, we animals have other humans watching our backs. California Congressman Elton Gallegly has introduced H.R. 5092 to make the Crush Act’s language more specific and overcome even the most blood-thirsty justices’ objections.

The ASPCA is also on the case. Cats Working urges you to visit their Advocacy Center to find out if your representative is a co-sponsor of the bill and, if not, urge him or her to become one so it can be passed quickly.

The Supreme Court is WRONG. Crush videos must NEVER be allowed to regain a foothold.

10 Responses to Let Supreme Court Star in Crush Videos

  1. Tuxi says:

    When I heard about this I knew Mom would go ballistic, and she did! She’s pissed at the SCOTUS for that Give CEOs The Government ruling and this makes her want to rent a highway roller and iron out those black robes with the f**kers still in them! Yes, we cats use the f-bomb too! Mom said she’ll sign every petition and call our worthless GOP Rep. and our 2 Dem. Sens. Stupid Supreme Assholes!

  2. catsworking says:

    I like that steamroller idea! There’s nothing “supreme” about that bunch, and I pity the poor fool Obama picks to join them.

    It seems to be time to start talking about a mandatory retirement age for that bunch of Fruit Loops.

    Forget about protesting healthcare reform. This issue should unite every pet owner in the country because it’s PET animals those crush videos specialize in.

  3. Zappa says:

    I am clawing the sofa in outrage! How can I manage to wear my mom’s high heels and get myself over to the Supreme Court? It’s just a few subway stops away from my house,do you cats have any suggestions?


  4. catsworking says:

    Zappa, since we’re never allowed out of the house, we don’t have any transportation tips. However, if you know any really big dogs, maybe you could talk one into stealing his owner’s car and driving you into DC. Dogs are better able to reach the pedals, although your agility might come in handy when it comes to lifting the keys and you could certainly help steer.

    You’ll probably have to hop the subway to get home again because the dog will get arrested for parking illegally while you’re in court shredding the judges.

  5. Joanaroo says:

    Wow! It’s gonna snow purple in SEPA! Our GOP Rep., Jim Gerlach, is well known for being bedfellows with big business and big energy and being against everything for the common man, even tho he claims not. But he is a Grand Ol Pet-Lover whose only attributes are he is a co-sponsor of the legislation to overturn this SCOTUS ruling on crush videos and has written legislation against puppy and kitten mills and has worked for pets in emergency shelters. So I can call and thank him for that. Yes, I can do that!

  6. catsworking says:

    Joanaroo, whenever you catch a human behaving well, you should praise him for it to encourage him to do more of the same. If the only ones who are going to benefit from Gerlach being in Congress are corporate fat cats and animals, then definitely put in a good word for the animals!

  7. Joanaroo says:

    I called his office in DC and I got his voice mail, which is better since they have a record of my address and name which lessens spelling errors. Whenever I’ve signed animal welfare petitions he’s written back so I asked for a letter letting me know how the other bills on animals did that he authored or cosigned. Still tho, I could smack him one because he can be very callous about people issues. I e-mailed him about falsehoods he was pushing about health care reform that were proven false. Never heard from him about that!

  8. Joanaroo says:

    He had sent me campaign material which I kept that had those falsehoods printed on it, and that got me steamed during the Obama Ordeal of dealing with the GOP. I’ve been having a positive (animal issue)/negative (people issue) relationship with him since the early 80s and he probably was so glad when in the mid- to late- 80s I went to college in central-PA out of his district! =)

  9. Imabear says:

    I don’t understand why they don’t arrest these people making films on animal cruelty charges. I mean, what more evidence do they need????

  10. catsworking says:

    Eric Cantor persists in sending propaganda here. ERIC CANTOR! The Repubs’ fair-haired boy (well, actually dark-haired) whom they put forward to shoot his mouth off on every issue. His backward thinking is much beloved in these parts.

    Sounds like Gerlach went on a bender with the Palin Kool-Aid at some point. Drink it, and there’s no telling what lies will start spewing from your mouth.

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