Jon and Kate: Who the &$*%! Cares?

By Cole

OK, maybe I was out of touch in the joint (my former home, a no-kill shelter), but now that I have more access to TV, I keep seeing these stories about Jon and Kate and wonder why.

In case you’ve been living on Jupiter, Jon and Kate are probably getting a divorce.

At first, I thought they were just some D-list actors I’d never heard of, but they refused to go away. It didn’t take much digging (I Googled “Jon Kate” and got 34.1 million hits) to learn they’re a mixed-race pair of irresponsible breeders, famous only for having a litter of 8.

Eight kids who enabled Jon and Kate to cash in by having TLC put cameras up everybody’s butt. And now these wonderful, doting parents are splitting up so their kids will grow up ping-ponging between them — and the cameras are still rolling.

Touching, isn’t it?

I haven’t watched one minute of what’s got to be the most pathetic excuse for “entertainment” ever, but millions of people have. Why? Aren’t your own families interesting enough? And why didn’t TLC immediately pull the plug when this mob ceased being a real family? Now all they’ve got is a pack of sad, confused kids led by a pair of attention-hungry humans who need to be neutered and spayed before they find new breeding partners and mate again.

In my book, these two are Non and VaKate, they’re lowering the IQ of television into minus numbers, and they deserve to be cast back into obscurity.

9 Responses to Jon and Kate: Who the &$*%! Cares?

  1. Adele says:

    Cole, popular human “culture” must be quite a shock to you, after your years of confinement. I know it’s hard to believe that humans could be so interested in other humans, who become famous just for having litters. There’s another family, called the Dugars, who have 19 or 20 kids; I think they have a reality TV show, as well.

    Ask Karen to let you watch “Network” sometime. Although it came out in 1976, when you were just a sparkle in your great, great, great, great grandfather’s eye, the movie was remarkably prescient when it came to the future of television.

  2. catsworking says:

    Adele, you’re right. In the joint we saw cats and dogs brought in just about every day for doing the same thing as this Jon and Kate (breeding indiscriminately) and nobody was making celebrities out of them. In fact, they made sure pretty quick that it wouldn’t happen again!

    Thanks for the tip on that movie, too. I know I’ve got a lot of catching up to do.

  3. zappa says:

    Hi guys!
    I’ve really missed you! The Human’s laptop was at the vet and there is just no getting to her Blackberry!(you’d think it was peoplenip!!) We don’t watch this show in my house because my mom hates them and calls them awful names!
    Don’t you think that the TV Humans should makea show about rescue shelters? I bet you guys have tons of stories about the drama and catfights behind-the-scenes.That would be juicy,pawlicking television,don’t you think?


  4. catsworking says:

    Zappa, welcome back. You are so right. Kitty reality TV would be almost too much for humans to handle. The nonstop drama in the joint is off the charts. And they wouldn’t let us have any ‘nip to take the edge off at the end of a hard day of being cute for the lookie-loos who might take us home because they feared we’d start a riot and stampede out of there. It was hard enough just sneaking out of the big cat room to use the computer to practice our typing and surf the Net at night.

    Sorry to hear about your lack of access to the computer. Hope the human’s got everything under control now. You wouldn’t have liked the Blackberry anyway. The keys are too small for kitty paws. You’d have just gotten frustrated, batted it under the fridge, and ended up in big trouble.

  5. MorganLF says:

    And why is that chubby cheatin’ husband getting any? Is it me or is just ugly?

    Speaking of Cats typing has anyone ever read the “Silent Meow” by Paul Gallico? I read it as a kid you all will love it.

  6. catsworking says:

    No, Morgan, we have not read “Silent Meow.” Will have to look into that. Thanks!

    Kate is doing an “exclusive” interview on the Today Show on Monday morning, first one since her split with Jon. I have a feeling we’re going to see her stupid face on every talk show on TV over the next few weeks. And his.

  7. MorganLF says:


    I am trying to remember the premise of “The Silent Miaow” (soory spelled it wrong before) it seems this tough writer type finds an unusual manuscript one day next to his typewriter.

    Its all gobbledygook until he decodes it by figuring out if a cats paw was striking a key what other keys would it also strike. Ultimately he decodes the entire thing that was written by his cat in the original feline, and it turns out to be a manual for cats to train their families.

    My mother got a great kick out of it as did my cat Charlie.

  8. cpt/bustamante says:

    i have seen the show once and hated it, the kids are adorable but it seems to me all jon and kate do is argue, and that is not a healthy environment for children to be raised in. i think the divorce was unavoidable, and please america aren’t your own families interesting enough, i mean we should be watching good wholesome shows like no reservations. sincerely the cpt =)

  9. catsworking says:

    Hi, cpt, welcome back! Thanks for offering some insight into the show, since I’ve never seen it. All I’ve heard is that Kate’s a control freak and Jon is too uninvolved. Guess that was a recipe for divorce. What’s the fun of living with somebody who refuses to ask “How high?” when you say “Jump!”

    I didn’t watch Kate’s “exclusive” interview on the Today Show either, but I think she said she was keeping her wedding ring on for the sake of the kids. And then a few days later I heard a promo that she was going to take it off. So much for the poor traumatized kids. Sheesh! Are they going to alert the media every time she changes her underwear next? Too much information!

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