Rachael Ray is Gagging Dogs

By Yul

If you don’t think Rachael Ray’s so hot with people food, you’ll love this. She’s now selling her own line of dry dog food and putting her big ugly bitch Isaboo on all the packaging.

I’m not kidding. It makes me glad I’m a cat.

It’s called Rachael Ray Nutrish™. What, not Rachael Ray’s DFoo? (Rach, if I ever hear you using that name, even in fun, you owe me royalties.)

Nutrish is supposed to contain real meat, natural ingredients, no filler crap, yada, yada, yada. Apparently, it’s only people she doesn’t mind feeding frozen, processed, or straight-from-a-can junk to.

If the food’s all that, I’m taking bets that if the canine market pans out (which it should, since some dogs will eat cat poop), Rachael will somehow turn it into human snacks.

But it gets even better. There are also crunchy and chewy Rachael Ray Isaboo™ Treats that look suspiciously like Girl Scout Cookies®. Her “Booscottis” come in Bacon Flavor and Peanut Butter Flavor.

I’m thinking the word Flavor is her sneaky way of admitting the treats are basically doggie Dunkin’ Donuts®.

If you know a dog who needs a handout, she’s giving away free samples of Nutrish.

Interestingly, Nutrish’s home page and the Sunday newspaper coupon insert claim, “All of Rachael’s proceeds go to help animals in need.” But go to the Nutrish Story page and she writes…

“And you know me. I’m all about giving back, so some of the proceeds from Rachael Ray Nutrish go to charities that take care of animals who have no one else to look out for them.”

Anthony Bourdain could have a field day with this.

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9 Responses to Rachael Ray is Gagging Dogs

  1. Adele says:

    Watch out, Yul, next thing you know, RR will be making cat food. Wonder what she’ll call it — maybe Su-Purr.

    Isaboo may have a very nice personality, but she does have an unfortunate name. Good thing RR doesn’t plan on having kids.

    BTW, Alice wanted to know if you guys caught the Kitty Halftime show on the Animal Planet Puppy Bowl. Yes, it was exploitative, but the kittens were very cute. Alice felt compelled to point out that it’s not a stretch for a kitten to be cute, but she and I were both impressed by Pepper, the African Grey Parrot’s rendition of the national anthem

  2. Bob says:

    Found this on a Fan Wiki site.. Seemed appropriate given the topic..

    http://image.wetpaint.com/image/1/jEueEbQvC1abK5MGELucag152700/GW360H480

    Well what she makes already is pretty close to dog food anyways so it’s really not that much of a stretch.

    Hope that link works

    Burrr it’s cold here.
    Bob

  3. Oh, do I hope Anthony Bourdain does decide to have a field day with this. It will be hilarious!

  4. catsworking says:

    Since RR seems to think the sun rises and sets on Isaboo, I’m feeling pretty confident she’s a dog person and would never risk foisting her concoctions on cats, who would prove a much tougher audience.

    And you’re right about the name. I feel kind of sorry for that poor dog. She’s ugly enough, and now has to go through life with that cutsey-putsey name.

    No, we missed the Kitty Halftime show. I wonder if it’s on YouTube?

    Adele and I were adorable kittens without any effort at all. Nobody here ever saw Fred as a kitten. He was already battle-scarred and street-smart by the time he found Karen, estimated by the vet to be 6-10 months old.

  5. catsworking says:

    Bob, the link worked. I almost coughed up a hairball. Priceless!

    We were watching the South Carolina episode last night where Bourdain asked a waitress about Rachel’s tipping when she was filming “$40 a day.” They said 10%, but they may have been being kind because the question got such a strange reaction.

    I will be very surprised if he lets her current venture into dog food go without comment.

  6. MorganLF says:

    Any grown 40+ woman with a hideously raspy annoying voice still trying to capitalize on the somewhat “cuteness” she marginally had 10 years ago, by deliberately truncating words( sammies, E.V.O.O., Refers to herself as Rache, Nutrish)is on a douche level that defies comprehension. I can’t LOOK at that dopey mellonheaded weeble anymore! Dear god make her go away!!

  7. Adele says:

    Yul, I know you can catch Pepper’s rendition of the national anthem on YouTube, so I’d expect you could see a little bit of the Kitty Halftime show as well. Alice just bets you were an adorable kitten. She’s too modest to bring it up, but the first time I saw her (a friend had taken her pregnant mother in, and I first saw Alice at 3 weeks) I thought she was one of the prettiest kittens I’d ever seen. I wasn’t looking for another cat, but when she was 7 weeks old, she moved in.

  8. Melissa says:

    This stuff is hella spensive too. Walmart has a 6 pound bag for $9. Plus one of those “natural” ingredients is everyone’s favorite “iron oxide.” Mmmmmmm, rust. Delicious, delicious rust!

  9. catsworking says:

    Melissa, you’ve got me rolling on the floor with my legs in the air, laughing! Iron oxide!! All I can say is, if Rachael Ray thinks rust is “yummo,” I’m glad she’s feeding it to DOGS.

    And you know if it’s $9 a bag at Walmart, it’s probably $11+ anywhere else (the price probably includes a royalty for Ray’s picture on the bag). Karen’s got to make a run to PetsMart for us this weekend. I’ll remind her to check it out.

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