Some humans with grossly underdeveloped palates are turning cats’ most intimate “business” into a Halloween dessert. It’s called kitty litter cake, and it looks revolting enough to make Andrew Zimmern retch.
Let me set the record straight on this: No self-respecting cat would ever let a litterbox get to this advanced state of “use” without protest – probably through an artistically arranged “pile” in your clothes basket that wouldn’t be partially melted Tootsie Rolls, or perhaps a puddle of pee on your pillow.
Even Mark Mason, who regularly publishes the purloined writings of his cats Mars and Indy on Cat Diary, has embraced this feline culinary fetish.
The Web has many similar recipes. All the ingredients are edible, and they carefully specify use of a new litter pan and scoop, but the very thought of anyone eating a faux cat turd – particularly a dried-out one draped over the side of a box – makes even me a little queasy.
Going back to Cat Diary, what’s with those pathetic humans trying to look like cats? And here’s another one, a computer programmer named Dennis Avner who has tattooed himself from head to toe.
They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery but, guys, your getups aren’t exactly an homage to the beauty of cats. If I weren’t fighting the urge to hurl from the cake, I’d be laughing.