The hunt for Ottavia Busia Bourdain is over – and my eyes are still burning.
She’s been right under our noses for some time. Anthony Bourdain cleverly concealed her out in the open, like in Casablanca, when Rick stashed the letters of transit in Sam’s piano.
Web-surfing, I found a casual comment mentioning she was in Tuscany and on Miami Ink with him. The Ink segment’s on YouTube.
In the Tuscany episode of No Reservations, the same woman’s mysteriously sitting at the table to Tony’s right when he cooks Sicilian for his difficult director, and she declares his caponata “disgusting.” Then she’s standing by in a low-cut sundress while he learns to make pasta, and she partakes of the feast in the final scene.
Ottavia’s cute, stacked, and about half his age.
I think Bourdain’s having a mid-life crisis. After finding somewhat belated celebrity, he split from a wife who stuck by him for 30 years and tolerated loads of crap to fall for someone young enough to be his daughter. You can’t blame Ottavia for being eager to step in and enjoy the perks of his success, and she had the foresight to cement her place in his life by making him a father.
He must be thrilled now to have an adoring spouse who’s unafraid to display her cleavage and navel jewelry, and just grins like a fool while her 50-something husband has a hideous skull tattooed onto his shoulder.
I doubt Wife No. 1 could have pulled it off.
As Ottavia matures into her prime, she’ll be there to comfort Tony when his inevitable descent down the other side of the hill starts, which I hope won’t be for many years.
On the other hand, he may wake up canceled and sober one morning and realize they have almost nothing in common but a daughter. They say divorce gets easier the more you do it.
For a man so brilliant and untamed, I’m surprised he let the brain below his belt take over. When he’s pushing 70 and Ariane’s in high school, I wonder how he’ll deal with being mistaken for her grandfather?