Giuliani the Un-Candidate… Romney the Undead?

By Fred

I was sorry to see John Edwards leave the Democratic race, but I don’t blame him. Rather than taking sides with what’s left, I’ll leave it up to the convention. I commend Edwards’ pit-bull determination to stay with the issues until they were eclipsed by race and gender.

But what was up with Giuliani? After roaring out of the gate, he either hung out with total boneheads or personally had the worst idea ever: to skip the Republican dogfights in Iowa, New Hampshire, and South Carolina. He probably thought he was keeping his paws clean, but anyone who’d expect Florida retirees to propel him into the White House is too stupid to be president. Oops, except for Bush, of course.

Tim Russert summed it up when he told Brian Williams that the more people saw of Giuliani, the less they liked him. Who wants to listen to Rudy chant “9/11” like a mantra until 2012?

Buying into that, the media fostered this myth that Rudy’s a fierce junkyard dog on terrorism, but I don’t think he ever took down a single terrorist – rescued a survivor, or recovered a victim – from 9/11. Without the bullhorn, his style was to sneak around on his wife and tell her via TV he wanted a divorce, rather than ‘fess up to her face.

Some hero.

I just hope Giuliani’s whopping 15% of support will be enough to help John McCain keep the lid down on Mitt Romney’s coffin.

Romney makes my fur stand on end. With his preternaturally calm demeanor, chiseled physical perfection, and mysterious dark places in his private life, it seems he’d feel more at home in Castle Dracula than the White House. Every time he mentions Ronald Reagan, I wonder if he ever met Reagan – as a bat.

At least McCain doesn’t make you want to wear a wider collar to hide your neck.

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