TasteTV Names Anthony Bourdain “Person of the Year”

By Karen

TasteTV is rolling out the red carpet for Anthony Bourdain. He’ll receive a special achievement award as “Person of the Year” at the 2010 Tasty Awards on January 14, 2010.

No Reservations was nominated for Best TV Food Program – competing with 30 Minute Meals, Diners, Drive-ins and Dives, Man v. Food, Gourmet’s Diary of a Foodie, and Top Chef. You can cast a Viewer’s Choice vote in that category.

No Res is also in the running for Best TV Food Travel Series, and Bourdain as Best Male Host in a Series.

No telling if Tony will be at the ceremony because the Cayman Cookout on Grand Cayman begins the same day.

When Bourdain was in Denver on November 18, he ate elk, wild boar, and reindeer hotdogs at Biker Jim’s sausage cart, proclaiming them the “pinnacle of American food.” He then bought and wore the T-shirt to his appearance and proceeded to diss New York City street food.

Commenters at Midtown Lunch responded to Bourdain’s blasphemy.

Tony also talked more trash about Guy Fieri, particularly his hair. Not sure if it’s the spikes or the color that inspire his ire.

And just to prove that Bourdain’s whining about there being nothing but chicken wings and fried mozzarella in Denver was unjustified, a special order of bacon-cashew brittle was delivered to his hotel.

Asian Foodie saw Tony with David Chang at the Union Square Barnes & Noble in New York on November 23. She found Chang dull, his constant cursing notwithstanding, and Tony tame (maybe in a mellow mood for Thanksgiving?). But he bad-mouthed New York City food AGAIN.

Joseph Bayot did a very thorough write-up on this appearance, well illustrated with shots of Bourdain’s spikeless new ‘do.

For every fan who goes sour on Bourdain, it seems there’s always a new one waiting in the wings. Things I Learned Watching TV has decided that Tony isn’t a douche after all and is now a NR devotée.

And Hey, Coach J admits she has a crush on Bourdain, even though she thinks he’s got terrible taste in clothes.

Black Cats Disappointed in Tiger Woods

By Cole

To cats, golf is like stalking a dead mouse, but Cats Working has been getting significant hits on the word tiger lately, so we feel compelled to offer a feline perspective on the Tiger Woods incident.

I was surprised when Tiger obliquely, by his own admission, admitted that he’s a philanderer. That’s assuming his public statement about “transgressions” he regrets with “all his heart” wasn’t referring to forgetting to take out the trash. And I’m betting it wasn’t because he left his socks on the floor that he jumped into his SUV to flee his home in terror at 2 a.m., hitting a fire hydrant and a tree.

Golf is so boring, it’s understandable that marrying a gorgeous young Swedish model can hardly compensate. Tiger pounced on the “variety is the spice of life” cliché to take his mind off the sheer futility of his days on the links.

But now Tiger has unwittingly unleashed a steady trickle of nocturnal bimbo types, dragging themselves out of bed before noon to grab 15 minutes of fame by claiming they slept with him — or didn’t.

Why must you punish us ALL, Tiger? WHY? Wasn’t there anyone classier you could cat around with?

Tiger has asked for privacy to sort things out. I agree he should have it. I’m sick of the sight of him everywhere. It’s not like his inability to keep his pants zipped affects anybody but the people involved. And it’s not as if golf is on most people’s list of what matters.

For all we know, under her stunning exterior Mrs. Woods may be dumb as a golf tee. But now that Tiger knows she, too, can swing a mean club, maybe he’ll have more respect for her.

To White House: Let the Ass-Kicking Begin!

By Yul

Sorry, Katie Couric. The Today Show snagged an “exclusive” with the White House crashers, with Matt Lauer carefully making them state they weren’t paid.

Now the party parasites claim a dead cell phone kept them from realizing they had no “tickets” to the state dinner for India’s prime minister. Like it was a sold-out Broadway show instead of an “invitation only” honor from President Obama.

Congress plans to grill them, but why waste time? This is a personnel matter where the White House needs to be taking names and kicking ass.

NBC news anchor Brian Williams said he saw the pair turned away at one gate. OK, that guard’s in the clear. So is the metal detector operator who ensured they weren’t packing heat.

Other than that, everyone else should be in deep doo-doo, facing serious — possibly terminal — disciplinary action.

The Today Show’s “legal expert,” Dan Abrams, said the couple may face no criminal charges if no one can prove they lied to anybody.

So if they had climbed a fence, crawled in through an unlocked basement window, and spoken to no one until they shook Obama’s hand, that would be all right?

The couple knows they crashed. They didn’t stay for dinner because they had no seats. They’re pros. The blonde routinely pretends she’s a former Redskins cheerleader to crash their reunions.

They can protest ‘til the cows come home, flashing their carefully worded e-mails with overly polite, unsuspecting dupes they exploited on the inside, like Pentagon official Michele Jones, who actually got them in to a morning ceremony that was canceled.

The couple is notorious in Virginia political circles, with a long-standing reputation for name-dropping and party-crashing, according to Governor Tim Kaine and Senator Mark Warner.

Until they’re locked away, far from the rich and famous, no social event is safe. The stupid media has shown them how easy it is to seize the spotlight, so unless they go to jail, we’ll never be rid of them.

Bourdain’s Been Clipped

By Karen

I’m finding it impossible to report this without sounding like a shallow groupie, but I was startled to find recent photos of Anthony Bourdain with a crewcut. I’m not kidding. Joe DiStefano at Serious Eats snapped some shots while Tony was in Flushing, N.Y., right before Thanksgiving — filming a commercial for Chase Sapphire.

The second most startling thing was reading that Bourdain used his signature line, “…and I’m hungry for more,” to shill for Chase, but we all know that couldn’t have been his idea.

Could his sleeker new look be a response to certain cruel comments (Ahem, Morgan?) about his former spikey, over-gelled ‘do?

La Diva Cucina was in Miami on November 13 for Bourdain’s appearance with Jacques Pepin and Eric Ripert and provides a beautiful illustrated write-up. While Ripert and Pepin competed in a cook-off, Tony chugged a beer in the background, not even pretending to be anybody’s sous chef this time. You have to wonder how much longer the press will persist in calling him the “bad-boy chef.”

La Diva also feels much the way I did about being forced to watch live cooking on stage through the lens of a camera, which I experienced at the Capital Food Fight on November 11.

Guest blogger Natalie at Corn Commentary rips Bourdain a new one for the way he answered her question during his appearance in Columbus, Ohio, on November 21.

While Tony was in Columbus, Restaurant Widow got asked to arrange dinner for Tony and Michael Ruhlman at her favorite restaurant, Kihachi. During his appearance, Tony told the audience her blog was where he learned about the restaurant. He’s been saying he now relies on local bloggers for dining recommendations.

It’s another reason I’ll never hear him utter the words “Cats Working” in public. There isn’t a restaurant in Richmond, Va. I could recommend (not that there probably aren’t some great ones — I just don’t get out much). My favorite is a nearby award-winning barbecue joint called Q.

Diners Without Frosted Tips got some illicit video of Bourdain talking about his favorite breakfast during his appearance in Rochester, N.Y., on November 20.

I Appreciate That admires polar opposites — Anthony Bourdain and Woody Harrelson. I wonder if she’d think less of Tony if she knew he has been known to say unkind things about Woody’s eating habits? (Somebody help me out here. It was on No Res, speaking before a large group. Was he in New Zealand?)

Why Aren’t White House Party Crashers in Jail?

By Yul

The social parasites who crashed the first White House state dinner (unnamed to avoid feeding their rush upon Googling themselves), stood up Larry King to shop their story around the networks for hundreds of thousands of dollars.

They need the money. Blondey allegedly hasn’t paid her hairdresser since 2002, and her polo-playing hubby sent his parents’ Virginia winery into bankruptcy.

But instead of talking TV deals, this pair should be talking to the CIA — in an undisclosed location under a naked bulb while being beaten senseless with rubber hoses for making President Obama look like a fool in front of India’s prime minister.

I rarely miss the Bush administration, but Cheney would have known how to handle this, and it wouldn’t have involved posing with trespassers for Facebook.

Let’s hope no network is stupid enough to take their bait. These people aren’t news, and they’ve already made too many front pages. If we keep feeding freaks’ insatiable need for attention, they’ll never go away. Hear that, Jon and Kate Gosselin?

NBC news anchor Brian Williams aptly compared the crashers to “Balloon Boy,” the kid whose father pretended his son was trapped in a runaway balloon to land a reality show. He pleaded guilty to a felony. Shouldn’t invading the White House carry a stiffer penalty — say, a few years of hard time?

Obama simply can’t let this pair get off scot-free — or sit back and let them profit from their dishonesty — or he’ll cement the growing perception that he’ll roll over and play dead on just about anything.

Goalie Penalized for Kindness to Cat

By Cole

Being a sports-loving cat can can get you in trouble in Croatia. When a stray cat wandered onto the field of a soccer match (they call it “football”) in Sebenik, the goalie for the visiting Medjimurje Cakovec team, Ivan Banovic, carried it to safety and put it through the fence under the scoreboard.

Then the referee penalized Banovic with a “yellow card” for leaving the field without permission.

I’m wondering what the stupid referee expected the players to do with a cat on the field. Trample it to death, kick it for a goal, or hit it with the soccer ball?

Even though Banovic’s team lost 0-1 to Sebenik, fans cheered for him the rest of the game to register their approval of his kitty kindness.

Maybe some soccer fan can tell me what a yellow card is. Does soccer have different colored cards for different penalties? Do players collect the cards and trade them? Do their uniforms have special pockets to hold the cards while they’re playing?

Instead of throwing flags, just imagine American football referees — I mean real football, with the flattened-out ball that bounces funny — handing out cards to naughty players.

Not to miss a chance for product placement, Hallmark could provide the cards, inscribed with poignant verses reminding players of their neglected mothers and moving them to tears, causing even more time-outs and extending already-interminable games into all-day events.

Referees’ flags would become hankies for weeping tight ends, and teary commiserations would be shared during huddles, which would be renamed “support groups.”

Somehow, I think cards would take all the fun out of the chasing and tackling, although all the male bonding would probably cause a marked increase in butt-fondling.

New Moon Sucks the Life Out of Vampires

By Karen

I was sort of railroaded into seeing New Moon last week (don’t ask). I know I’m spitting in the face of the film’s rampaging success, but as a vampire aficionado, I hated almost every minute of it.

At least Mathew DeKinder of the St. Louis Suburban Journals is in my corner.

First, I don’t understand why author Stephanie Meyer gave nocturnal titles to any of her 4 Twilight saga books. She could have called the series High Noon. By ignoring or failing to research vampire legend, her vampires are basically ordinary folk with pale skin and red eyes — more albino than bloodsucker. They don’t drink human blood. In daylight, they sparkle like jewels. Sunlight doesn’t even sting.

Nighttime, coffins, native earth, crosses, mirrors, stakes, running water. Forget ‘em. These pathetic excuses for vamps probably order extra garlic on their Domino’s pizza.

I know, I know. I need to read the books to see why vampire Edward Cullen is so mesmerizing. But I never read the books because I suspected no good could come from a Mormon writer playing with the undead, and New Moon proves me right. She’s steered a whole generation wrong on vampires.

The audience consisted mostly of teen girls. God help them if they identify with boring Bella Swan. Bella loves the vacant Edward, while a werewolf named Jacob loves her, and we waste the better part of 2 hours watching the 3 of them stare deeply into each other’s shallow eyes.

In Twilight world, the ultimate sin a vampire can commit is to go shirtless and let people see him sparkle.

Werewolves don’t fare much better. A full moon doesn’t trigger their transformation. Just annoy them and they turn furry. As humans, they wear nothing but shorts year-round in the Northwest. Shorts that seem to miraculously disappear and reappear. I wondered if they represented the ubiquitous underwear Mitt Romney refuses to talk about.

The film never explains why Bella loves Edward, but much of her screen time is spent is moping around after he disappears “forever” to protect her — from what? Another vampire sparkling at her?

Except for a few moments of spectacular werewolf special effects, New Moon is sheer tedium, the brief appearance of Michael Sheen (Tony Blair in The Queen, David Frost in Frost/Nixon) as ancient vampire Aro notwithstanding. Why, Michael, why?

Dracula, Nosferatu, Lestat, and Eric from True Blood must be curling in their coffins to think the torch has been passed to a droopy drip like Edward Cullen.

I’m counting on Johnny Depp to restore vampires to their former gory glory in 2010 when he plays Barnabas Collins in the remake of Dark Shadows.

Feline H1N1 Takes a Deadly Turn

By Yul

H1N1 isn’t just a ferret-killer. Since I last reported on it, at least three more cats have caught it and one of them died.

Buddy Lou was a 10-year-old male cat who lived in Oregon. About a week after a child in his house had H1N1, Buddy developed a weird pneumonia (view x-rays) and tested positive for H1N1. Antibiotics and oxygen failed to help. Buddy deteriorated over 4 days at the vet’s and he died on November 7.

Buddy Lou (Photo - Chicago Now/Steve Dale)

Buddy lived with 3 other cats who started coughing and sneezing, but none tested positive and all recovered.

The following week, a cat in Utah got sick after its owner had H1N1. This cat was having trouble breathing, and an initial nasal swab was negative, but further testing confirmed it was H1N1. That cat recovered.

Nine ferrets in Oregon came down with H1N1 after humans in their household had it, but they all recovered.

AnnArbor.com reported that 2 cats, 13 and 14 years old, also contracted H1N1, but they both recovered. Since none of these cats were named, it’s impossible to tell if they were additional cases or not.

Humans take note: NO ONE has reported cats passing H1N1 to humans.

Cats have no vaccine for H1N1. Dogs so far are unaffected, but they have their own flu, H3N8, and they do have a vaccine for it. (It figures.)

People, watch your cats for lethargy, poor appetite, fever, runny nose and/or eyes, sneezing, coughing, or changes in breathing (including difficulty breathing). It could be H1N1 and the cat needs to see the vet STAT.

If you are sick, protect your cat as you would try to protect your kid. Don’t sneeze into your hand and then pet the cat. It can lick the virus off its fur. Cover your face when you sneeze or cough to keep the virus out of the cat’s air space. Don’t handle the cat or its belongings with germy hands.

The Latest Bourdainia

By Karen

Actually being with Anthony and Ottavia Bourdain temporarily interrupted my usual cyber-hunting, but my Bourdain calendar is blank the rest of 2009, so I think Tony may be wrapping up his appearances this year. Here’s some catch-up…

Hill’s Kitchen caught a pic of Tony when he was in Des Moines on November 5.

Des Moines will be included in a Midwest episode of No Reservations during Season 6. Tony killed 2 birds with one stone by filming a scene at Bistro Montage while he was there.

AnnArbor.com snagged an interview before Tony’s appearance there on November 7.

Go Ahead and Snicker saw him in Ann Arbor and offers favorite Tony quotes.

While in Ann Arbor, Tony ate in some restaurant where he met chef and cookbook writer Max Sussman and posed for a picture. Sussman wrote Freshman in the Kitchen: From Clueless Cook to Creative Chef with Eli Sussman.

ClubFood shot a really creepy video about why Anthony Bourdain is her hero. Not sure about her dates, since I wasn’t aware he appeared anywhere on November 9. But between her drugged/hung-over(?) demeanor and her peeling orange nail polish, I’d say he has much more to fear from fans like this than the middle-aged ladies who read Cats Working. ClubFood even caught a snippet of illicit footage from his appearance. which you’ll find at about 5:30. And then her first commenter, the charming Deathrape2001, gets Bourdain totally wrong in every way.

Washingtonian.com had the most interesting recap of the Capital Food Fight on November 11 I’ve seen, and they critiqued Tony’s garb for the evening.

Next, Bourdain and family headed to Miami for a celebrity chef event with Eric Ripert and Jacques Pepin on November 13, and allpurposedark snagged a little Q&A. (Note to Morgan: Tony uses the word douchebag.)

Miami New Times reveals that Bourdain is on the short list of chefs (with Ripert and Ramsey) whom Ingrid Hoffman of the Food Network’s Simply Delicioso would like to cook naked with, in the answer to what has to be one of the most stupid interview questions ever.

TimesUnion.com interviewed Tony by phone before his appearance in Schenectady on November 15, after which he was flying to Ecuador to film No Res.

Speaking of Ecuador, We Travel World did a little fixing and got to meet Tony and crew while they stayed at the Mandala for 2 nights. Bourdain apparently wasn’t much-recognized outside of Quito.

Here’s what the TimesUnion reporter had to say after Bourdain’s Schenectady appearance.

Denver Post got an advance phone interview before his sold-out November 18 appearance there, and learned that Bourdain is now actively seeks to undermine the “bad boy” tag he can’t seem to shake.

Just to rub it in that Bourdain once vowed never to return to Denver after saying he couldn’t find any good food, Mayor John Hickenlooper presented him with the “Fork to the City.”

Café Society ran a contest to recommend 3 good restaurants for Bourdain in exchange for a pair of tickets, and this was the winning entry. After his appearance, they also posted one of the worst pictures I’ve ever seen of him.

A.V. Club reports on what Tony said in Denver and offers a bit of illicit video from the Q&A portion.

ROCNow scored an advance phone interview with Bourdain before his appearance in Rochester, NY, on November 20. Bourdain says he realizes that writing will be his fall-back after TV, and hints that maybe he’s getting weary of No Reservations.

James Leach with Rochester City Newspaper got another advance interview where Tony talks about becoming famous and offers a tiny preview of Season 6 of No Res.

DemocratandChronicle.com reports that Rochester gave Tony a standing ovation just for showing up.

AskMen.com did its annual ranking of the most influential men and places Bourdain at No. 73, although readers rank him 94th (the lower the number, the more influential). In 2007, he was No. 19. I’m guessing the husband-father thing may explain the slippage.

Karl Klockars, a food blogger in Illinois, wants to know what Bourdain has written lately to deserve the laurels he’s resting on, and criticizes his diligence in following Web buzz about himself.

Alice at Uncommon Sense writes an eerily lyrical love/hate letter to Bourdain that makes her regret her humdrum existence as a college student in Texas.

Finland has launched a campaign to get Bourdain to pay a visit.

In honor of the upcoming holiday…

Here’s a video clip of Bourdain preparing a turkey and stuffing from his only holiday special. It’s the closest Tony may ever come to doing a cooking show. Pass me some of that stuffing, Tony!

If you’re in New York City, Tony will be at the Union Square Barnes & Noble TONIGHT with David Chang at 7 p.m. and it’s free.

Will Sarah Palin Ever Run Out of Scapegoats?

By Adele

Short answer? No. And Oprah Winfrey walked on eggs trying not to become the next one. Sarah Palin’s book, Going Rogue, began polluting bookstores yesterday, blaming everybody for everything. Now she’s whining to Rush LimpPaw, Barbara Walters, and anybody else who can listen to her with a straight face.

Oprah seemed unusually subdued for most of their chat, carefully lobbing softball questions as if she’d been ordered, “Don’t try to make Sarah ad lib an original thought or say anything she can’t readily quote from the book.”

Oprah did dare to replay the infamous clip of Katie Couric asking Palin about what she reads. Palin’s still oblivious to the fact that she’s the only one who detects malice or a hidden agenda — and she still can’t name a title.

New York Times book reviewer Michiko Kakutani has pegged Going Rogue as “part cagey spin, part earnest autobiography, part payback hit job,” and hinted that Palin’s co-author, Lynn Vincent, features editor of an evangelical magazine called World, did Palin no favors by not cleaning up nonsensical imagery like this sentence from the first paragraph:

“I breathed in an autumn bouquet that combined everything small-town America with rugged splashes of the Last Frontier.”

Oprah only seemed to thaw out when she got Palin to say Levi Johnston has an open invitation to Thanksgiving, right after she trashed him by claiming he aspires to a porn career because of his relatively modest Playgirl spread.

Speaking of trashing, Palin also did a number on John McCain’s key campaign staff, especially manager Steve Schmidt, who calls the book “total fiction.” McCain has only said he’s “disappointed.”

So the dimwit thinks she gets the last word by putting her delusions in print.

The Associated Press did some fact-checking and, not surprisingly, found Palin’s facts lacking.

I confess, like President Obama, I will probably never read Palin’s book because Karen won’t let me. But the buzz tells me if you’re looking for reasons Palin would make a good president, they aren’t in Going Rogue.